Wednesday – my official day off. My daughter works at the same office so I dragged myself out of bed and drove her to work. I would usually stop for a bite to eat on the way home but I’ve felt like puking for three days so I just went home, back to bed and waited for the sun to make my room too hot to tolerate again.
I ran out of pain meds days early so the “rationing” has me fighting withdrawal again. I don’t see the quacktitioner until Friday and the HMO I have wants all their patients off pain meds so thy don’t piss off the politicians. The appointment will be just another argument with them trying to make me do things I cannot do. I’d rather live a day pain free and die of a fucking overdose than go on this way.
Maybe I wouldn’t want to die so badly if people had something better to do than try and control me. I wish I had the guts to slice an artery. Why can’t I do it???????