I went to see my therapist a week ago. I told her I was starving myself, and that when I do eat something small, I purge. She looked at me and said I was fine. I don’t think I’m skinny enough anyways, but what bothered me was that she just glanced at me and in less than a minutes she decided I was fine. Is that normal for therapists to do? Or I am just exaggerating and I’m perfectly fine? My psychiatrist said the same. But everyday the first thing I do is weigh myself. I love seeing the number drop. I hate when it goes up. I feel like I’m a failure. Can you help?
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First off, are you actually fat? Or are you what people would consider a “normal” weight? Being an actual fat person (like I am pretty fuckin fat) who has disordered eating habits, they might not be taking you seriously because you are not at a low BMI and they see whatever you are doing as healthful. All a lot of people give a shit about is weight loss for fat people, they don’t care how about you go it as long as the end result is weight loss, which is a very unfortunate and harmful mindset. So if you are fat (or even if you don’t look fat, overweight), that is something that a lot of therapists think, even though it is a bad mindset that leads to undiagnosed eating disorders. Clearly, as you are not eating (and getting rid of what little you do eat), you do have an eating disorder. They just might not see it due to the fat factor or, if you aren’t actually fat, due to it not being strictly anorexia/bulimia. I would find another therapist, honestly. Unless you downplayed your situation accidentally to the therapist, they should be talking about it more with you and encourage you to seek help from them for disordered eating.
If you do not mind, how long has this behavior been going on? How much weight has been lost (this is something that is a part of the anorexia diagnosis guidelines–you used to have to be under a certain BMI, but I believe they changed it to a certain percentage of body weight lost in a certain amount of time)? Have you experienced any of the negative physical affects of withholding food, such as dizziness upon standing, fainting, etc.? Sorry for all of the questions, but what your therapist did is totally unprofessional and am trying to see somewhere where they might have misinterpreted your eating behavior to seem not that bad (even though that is still bad on their part, as the deadly effects of eating disorders don’t necessarily come at a lower weight). I really hope everything gets better for you.
I had trouble with eating disorders as well in the past. I was bulimic and I have starved myself (eating one meal a day). A problem with binge eating and starving is that your body will go in starvation mode, gain the weight back, and you feel much worse. The only thing thay really helped me (considering I lost 25lbs) was dieting properly. Eating clean (whole foods which helped with the mood). You are what you eat.
I’m not sure but try checking out paleo or keto. I did a low carb diet and I lost fat (I guess what people are too concerned is weight but not fat loss). It’s all in our head how we see things but I know nutrition plays a huge role. Eat good feel good.
I hope this helps and wish you the best in conquering your eating disorder.
I say the weight scale is influenced by water (weight starts to fluctuate) so it is best to measure yourself to feel your body tight. Cuz someone with the same weight as you could have a bigger fat percentage etc.
Honestly when I was 150 2 years ago, compared to 150 now, I have less body fat (I worked out as well).
you’re not fat. i can tell even without pics. if they looked at u and said that ur fine.
I have had similar experiences with every therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, or counselor I have ever went to. I’ve been through so many and finally just gave up on trying that over a decade ago. It wasn’t about an eating disorder, but it didn’t feel like a single one ever actually listened. I was just kind of “looked over” and they knew what was wrong because a book told them that’s what was wrong. All talking with mental health professionals did was make me feel more alone and put me in the hospital again. So I learned to avoid telling them how I was really feeling. Not that they truly listened anyway, but even if they did, what good can a guide do when you can’t even give them the map?
I struggle with no eating too. The last couple weeks when I was off work, I probably only ate 7 times in 12 days and I’m considering something like a grapefruit a meal. Of course, I had no energy and kept falling asleep all that time I had off from work, but it was nice to see I’d lost a little more weight. I just wish all the fat would go away. I can eat very little each day but it never goes away. Even after losing as much as I have, it’s still there. I always look fat no matter what I do.