I was here years ago ranting about how worthless my life was and how much I wanted it over. My life never got better it’s worse now. I’m looked down upon by everyone, I have no friends, I cry myself to sleep every night. I can’t get a girlfriend at all. I want love, happiness and joy but yet it has still avoided me. Nothing in my life has ever gone right, it feels like on the rare occasion I have a happy day, the next day is a completely depressing day. My car I just bought is broke down, several best friends abandoned me, the girl I thought was the one completely ditched me without saying even a good bye, no one respects me or even rarely acknowledges me. I feel like a ghost. I have absolutely no one to help me, no one who cares. Is this why I was born? To life a life of emptiness? I’m not doing it anymore, I can’t. I’m lethargic all of the time. I :, ( can’t take it anymore. I can’t. Nothing fucking happy ever happens to me. I’m nothing. I’m ending it tonight, there’s no reason for me here, there never was. My whole life was like this. I don’t even know why :, ( I’m not “ugly” I treat people with respect, I just :,( :, ( :, ( don’t fucking understand what the FUCK is wrong with me :, (. But it’s alright, because it will be all over in a couple of hours. Bye cruel inherently evil world, I should have never been birthed upon your shores, it’s a world of greedy whores, where those who care, get thrown to a bear, but yet I will miss your promises of hope, of your lonely singing insects, that filled my nights with ease. But yet here I am at the very end of it all, and I feel a happiness I have never felt, a cold happiness for I know it’s all over, no more wretched lonliness, no more hopelessly longing for love, no more of anything..just deep silence and an eternal sleep. I love you, I just wished I had someone to say those simple yet beautiful word to, a girl to cuddle with me and say it’s alright, and that she will be there no matter what, if she had only ever existed. Good bye world, I’m leaving for eternity, my memory will fade over time and I will just be another nameless human who once walked upon your desolate cities and deserts.
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5 comments
How old are you ? I have the same feeling , I feel so worthless as well . & I have no friends either . As for that female ? Her loss . Theres no need to end it . You don’t need to kill yourself , you may just have bad luck . I can feel you on the not be able to find love & being depressed . Theres people you can talk to . Such as me . But please dont end it , you may feel empty , but people love & care about you .
I am 20. I came on here when I was 16. Met good people. Parents discovered I was suicidal, long story short..alot of shitty counseling from counselors that don’t know shit. I’m just worried I’ll grow old and have alot of regrets and sorrow. That scares the death out of me. I just don’t how to get over this depression. How do you beat your own mind? Thanks your comment made me feel better. I will try to help you with your pproblem whenever I’m on here.
If we knew the answer to that eternal question, I am guessing none of us would need to be here lol. If the counselors couldn’t answer that question for you, I imagine it hard for any of us to give you any profound insight. After all, that is what they are paid for.
But, nonetheless, keep going. Keep persisting. Drunk people are really persistent. They say what they want. They do what they want. They don’t care about what others think. Persist like them, except preferably, sober.
If you don’t feel like doing anything, then don’t. Once you feel like doing something again, then do it. If you don’t feel like being happy, then don’t.
As for me, I scared my mind by looking down from a 75 ft bridge into dark waters. It was so scared, it stopped thinking. It just knew it didn’t want to die. It was kind of funny.
I usually do mindless , numbing activities . Such as listening to music , in some cases people might smoke / drink . I will admit I have ran to those options . It makes the pain go away for a while . Same with sleeping . Same result . & my problem is impossible to get rid of . It’s Unrequited love , unfortunately ..
Please Nihilism000 have a little bit more faith,you have to hold your faith inside.We look like comments on a computer screen but we really are people.If we understand you then i KNOW that you’ll find this person outside of this screen.It’s only common simple logic.I know what it feels like,i am at the same cloud as you.Just imagine that it’s a beautiful day,with your favorite smell (do you like the smell of rain?) and you’re a child, running free and excited out of your mothers loving hands. 🙂 Give yourself a second chance <3