You tend to forget how sadness and depression can have various different aspects to it. Just different types. Here I go, for another round, and I know that I’m not ready for this and honestly, I know there is never a good time, but this has got to be the worst time. This old life was actually starting to get a bit of flare and things were all good for once, despite the massive fuck ups. Its been such a shit year and for a few months things were appearing to be very pleasant. Just going through day by day, not having to worry, just being stoic dealing with this ruined psychology of mine.
I don’t know what I am supposed to do. I’ve known depression for a long time, but this time its something else and I don’t know where to begin, or how to even try and control it. All I know is that I’m losing him – he’s slipping away from me. And I can feel myself slipping through my fingers at the same time. But I honestly think that he was the reason that I was kept together. I don’t know where to go, because for such a long time I was holding his hand as he lead me through a place I’ve never been.
4 comments
The greatest gesture of self love you can do right now is get help. If he still cares for you then he will find this to be very encouraging. In the long run nobody likes being around someone who doesn’t love themself. I’m sorry if this is hard to deal with, but it’s true. I hope you find the help you need.
Things like this happen all the times… Be strong, and remember ‘when one door closed another will open for you’. (hah, sounds like a fortune cookie, but i mean those words)
*closes (ahh this typos)
Hi, Quiet.
This is one of those posts that makes me wonder what I could say to help you, and makes me want to go there where you are and give you a hug. I can feel so much sadness in your words. Some special people leave our lives forever sometimes, but are always with us in a way… If he really slips away from you, someday you two can be reunited again. Truth is that we never really know, but keep the memories close to your heart and be strong. Hug.