I cannot believe how much my life has changed in 6 months. I loved life, had amazing friends, family, educational and social life. I have always had quite a hard family life where I have had to help care for members of the family doing this daily made me think I was a good person.
My life is so different now. A video of me has went viral. I was drunk and have absolutely no idea wat the content is but EVERYWHERE I go I get laughed at, made fun of and have comments shouted at me. I have left my job because the abuse I get is so bad. I use to have so much respect for myself now I have none. Every day I go to bed hoping to not wake up, I make every excuse to not leave the house.
My family are the only reason I’m still alive. My dad cried the other day beggin me to get help because he’s worried what I’m going to do. He has no idea how much I just want to be dead. I need to be dead. I didn’t deserve any this.
Christmas 2015 is the night itl end for me.
I’m so sorry to my family I was jus not strong enough to get thro this.
4 comments
if you want to we can talk on skype a bit i have got a lot of time at the moment, all your choice : phil2921
I’m sorry to read that things have turned out badly. Life changes fast but our speciality is adapting to change. Personally 1 video of someone being drunk doesnt undo a load of hard work or caring that friend has shown over the months and years prior. Listen to your dad and speak to someone about this. Its great you have vented here but ending it all isnt worth it right now. It sounds like you’re riding on emotion and while I know it can be hard to shake, it wont end well :-/
You’re so much more than 1 video. Irrespective of what it did or didnt show. And frankly your friends should know when to stop if you have stopped leaving the house, changed job and I’m sure you are more reserved outside too now?
I’m sorry it isnt much, but Merry Christmas, please talk 🙂
I cannot face being alive another day. Social media is full of digs at me to. I come from a town that is 100 miles apart from the town I go to university and receive abuse in both. This video was taken in summer and it’s nearly January I have took months of a use hoping it would die down but it only gets worse. I just want it to stop anybody that knows me knows I’m a kind caring loving person and this had ruined my life.
I’m sorry you feel theres only one way out but theres gotta be a way to rise above the crap people say. I know its easy for me to say etc. but if its caused you to move jobs and stop leaving the house, clearly your dad sees your pain. Can any of your family help you out? Also the abuse you get online, if your friends are doing it thinking its just a laugh, do they not listen when you tell them straight that its well beyond a joke now? Personally I am surprised and diappointed to hear that it would continue after all thats happened and after do long…