what is this

maybe its just me and these strange feelings. I have no idea what it is nor how it started, began, developed and spread faster than a wildfire in the chamber of my heart.
you know that frustrating feeling when the person you care most about is in pain and all the loving, all the caring you poured into will never be able to take the pain away. shes my best friend but maybe shes more than just that, she sees me as any other friends she has but to me, shes a genuinely nice individual whom i cant bear to see in pain.
and all along i was hurting while she was hurting, who hurt more i did not know. all i do know is that she has absolutely no idea how much im hurting over her each day. i try to always be there, i let her pour her woes to me, try to make her trust me with everything, i got her food and treats to make her feel better but none of it changed. i feel like the wood in a fireplace, throwing myself in to let her burn longer but in the end, im burnt out.
then again perhaps this is love, i dont know, anyone ever felt this way?
please let her get better, i’ll bear her pain and let it fester inside of me, let it kill me softly just as long as she gets better, as long as i get to see a genuine smile on her face each day. I do not care if it means spending less time with her, if it means hanging out with someone else more significant to her would cheer her up. i’ll take it all, the emptiness, the loneliness and she never has to know how much i’ve ever felt for her. If shes happier with anyone else so be it. I just want her happiness back for her and she deserves the world. all along ive only wanted her
to be happy and im willing to make sacrifices.