I should be asleep. I have to be up in 5 hours. The loneliness is eating at me again. I so badly want someone to understand what’s really going through my head. I want to be wanted for who I really am, rather than who I pretend to be. But it’s impossible. Necessary, but impossible. Can’t let go of it. Can’t fulfill it.
Wish I had something to knock me out every night. During the day I can fill my head with crap to drown out the loneliness.
Instead, I’m stuck in this cycle of feeling exhausted during the day, and then anxious/lonely at night.