I have issues with eating too.
Not because I have major self-image issues, (I do, but not MAJOR,) i mean, I want to kill myself for it, but I don’t obsess over it.
i just either don’t have an appetite,
or sometimes, I feel like the food in this world is contaminated and so I wont eat.
Or the area that I am in.
I know I got some bad germaphobe problem, but I am very grateful I don’t have it too hard.
I am very. very grateful for that.
My self image issues are nothing short of constant obsession. It’s truly a miracle of The Divine that I haven’t resorted to the box-cutter already. Because it’s always on my mind. Like a looping song. Over and over and over and…
I hope you don’t mind that I laughed when you said “(I do, but not MAJOR,) I mean, I want to kill myself for it, but…”
Only on SP would that be considered non-major. Haha.
And wow, that germophobia/contamination delusion sounds rough. I’m really sorry about that. I’ve never felt that way exactly, but I used to get myself trapped in rooms because I would believe that if I touched the doorknob to open the door, a “poison” would leech out of my hand onto the knob and sicken whoever would touch it after me. Sorta similar. It also compelled me to avoid making food for people, looking them in the eyes, or touching them, for the same reason.
Ha ha 🙂 Only after I wrote that had I realized how funny it sounded.
🙂
Really put a laugh out.
Yes, doorknobs freak me out, but I can control it, and I think thats what matters the most about problems: Its not the problem itself, but how you cope/deal with it.
I enjoy talking to you.
🙂 You sound cool.
Haha, well then, if it made you laugh, there’s a silver lining after all. 🙂
And you’re absolutely right, about coping. I’m glad you can cope with some of your problems. Especially obsessions and delusions. Those are utter madness.
So, i have to … write this comment without using words that start with the letter “a”… challenge on!
I wonder, is that condition due to you having some bit of extra weight or is it just your perception of it? because if it’s just your perception, i have to put this question on the table: do you get some sort of relief by eating less? i guess partly i’m sort of questioning the why of your decision, not because i want to convince you otherwise, but because there has to be some reasoning behind that decision.
That said, i do eat the minimum sometimes, but it’s mostly because i used to be obese, so i’m kind of obsessed with not going back there. And yup, it took me some good while to find ways of making this comment have sense, while not using the words starting with the “A” letter, lol.
It’s partly dysmorphic perception, and partly the burden of legitimate extra weight. So both.
That last paragraph you wrote? That pretty much explains my own motivation. Formerly obese, and the mere thought of ever returning to that state makes me freeze, makes me panic. Can’t ever go back to that. I won’t allow it. Won’t allow it.
Jesus, then i understand completely. Took me decades to find a healthy compromise between the fear of going back to my former self and eating properly. So… yup, it’s hard dealing with that, but it can be done. People still tell me i’m way too thin at times (which to their eyes i’m pretty sure is true, not to mine) but as long as my weight is above the underweight/normal weight line they can keep their opinions to themselves, heh.
My oldest was over weight her entire childhood. She snuck food all the time. Her pediatrician drove me nuts trying to make me put her on a diet, making me test her for diabetes. I told her nope, not going to do it. Not going to force my daughter, who already has a clusterfuck of problems from her father leaving her, to go on a diet because you don’t like her weight. It would have just made the situation so much worse. I just didn’t stock any binge worthy foods like chips and cookies but she still stashed food in her room. I would go in there to clean and find plates stashed all over the place.
But you know what, I left her alone and she slowly got better. It wasn’t overnight, it wasn’t some kind of magic fix. I just supported her and trusted she would find her own way if I just supported her. She is a normal weight now and has found her peace with food.
I’ll also add she used to slice up her thighs, she still has some scars. They are very faint. She made it through the other side in one piece and has a very healthy outlook on life now. No idea how she did it or how I helped her achieve it or how this even really fits into this thread. Chalk this mini rant up to too much fried rice and diet rootbeer tonight.
Whiskered and Mf: would it be insensitive of me to quote Wallis Simpson by saying “you can never be too thin or too rich” Myself I like the rich part best.
That’s what I’ve been doing for a while, actually, but I always run out of food and end up relapsing. Because I’m the only one in my house who is on the diet/tries to eat healthy.
Of course you’d still like me as a person. And please, please understand that I’m so very grateful for that. But even so, you would still consider me ugly, probably. And here’s why that matters:
Humans are programmed with a subconscious prejudice against overweight people. That’s just a fact. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, either. It’s an evolutionary thing.
When I was thin for the first time, I was instantly treated better than I ever was as a fat girl. I refuse to let myself be “the ugly one” ever again.
But if that’s what you want we can meet and I scream OMG when I see you, HeHe. I’m attracted to women my own age, and I like em thick….. Don’t get me wrong I am Happily Married and It appears that I flirt here,,, Be sure that, that I’m like that to everyone.
How about joining a gym. Working out will help you both physically and mentally. My membership is not expensive at all and well worth it. Please consider it.
I’ve considered it. It doesn’t even sound like a bad idea— the only thing that’s ever stopped me from doing so is the fact that I still can’t drive, and that I hate exercising (or existing, for that matter) out in public. I could probably get over the second hang-up, though.
Well well, hopefully i don’t sound insensitive but I hope it works out for you.
And yes unfortunately people are wired that way.
its actually a shame society makes people go to such measures. But society is full of judgmental people. Um, i feel, I’m going to sound like a prick here, but I would want to be liked because of what i do, not because of my appearance, I mean, society is meant to be civilized, right? Clearly isn’t..same crap goes on with wild animals…
i give a shit if I’m ‘liked’ but… ok you want people who like you for who you are. Inside..
i cant go on anymore, i just sound like an asshole sorry
Oh, don’t worry, NIIL, I never mind your comments. We all talk about ourselves on other people’s posts, and that’s alright, in my opinion. We’re here to pull each other up, so, mi casa es su casa.
And you’re right, in any case. I ought to worry about actually being a likable person, whether in personality or in deed, instead of focusing on my appearance. I sound really shallow on this post, in these comments. It’s sad. I don’t consider myself a shallow person, and I don’t want to be one.
I just have lived my entire life with my worth as a human being hinged on my appearance, and now that I’m as old as I am, my programming is now so automatic, so deep seated…that I just have trouble respecting myself if I don’t look the way I’m supposed to.
Ok, I can completely understand the feelings you are having. I have my own long standing food issues or whatever they are. 20 some years and counting. I have had weights from seriously underweight to moderately overweight. I beat myself up about it constantly. I’m not going to tell you to eat (even though food is not the enemy) but I will say try to take care of yourself the best you can.
Well, I’m willing to listen. But I honestly don’t see how it’s dangerous. Or at least, how it’s more dangerous than eating yourself to death (what I’m currently doing).
Eating disorders are one crazy ride. You start easily, almost always through the idea that eating is a bad thing you can’t control . Truth is body is tricky, and it has needs.
Actually the word disorder is plain it means you get deorganized with how and what you eat, simple and direct word.
But what it doesn’t imply is how much stress it generates to the body the fact your mind is saying that what it needs is bad. So you think, ok easy: deny the need, feeling thin is important. (And it is, it’s related with self stern and with how we relate with the world through our bodies, so it is not superficial at all)
Body has several options, there are three very famus ones: being denied and then afront it in numbness and silen fake resignation (bad thing); or become revelious and making your desire for food more unmanageable, wish means it can either make you want to purge or make you eat non stop.
And no, I am not being dramatic here. The step between having a healthy relationship with food and having a nightmare at hands is so small most people don’t even know when they took it.
And whisky we know we of all people can’t take that risk, we are more vulnerable (and I am sorry if I am talking out of line here).
The road you need to take is one that is more demanding: a reorganization of your relationship with food…
I don’t know if I am making a point here…. 🙁 but it worries me you want to play with fire
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46 comments
I have issues with eating too.
Not because I have major self-image issues, (I do, but not MAJOR,) i mean, I want to kill myself for it, but I don’t obsess over it.
i just either don’t have an appetite,
or sometimes, I feel like the food in this world is contaminated and so I wont eat.
Or the area that I am in.
I know I got some bad germaphobe problem, but I am very grateful I don’t have it too hard.
I am very. very grateful for that.
My self image issues are nothing short of constant obsession. It’s truly a miracle of The Divine that I haven’t resorted to the box-cutter already. Because it’s always on my mind. Like a looping song. Over and over and over and…
I hope you don’t mind that I laughed when you said “(I do, but not MAJOR,) I mean, I want to kill myself for it, but…”
Only on SP would that be considered non-major. Haha.
And wow, that germophobia/contamination delusion sounds rough. I’m really sorry about that. I’ve never felt that way exactly, but I used to get myself trapped in rooms because I would believe that if I touched the doorknob to open the door, a “poison” would leech out of my hand onto the knob and sicken whoever would touch it after me. Sorta similar. It also compelled me to avoid making food for people, looking them in the eyes, or touching them, for the same reason.
Ha ha 🙂 Only after I wrote that had I realized how funny it sounded.
🙂
Really put a laugh out.
Yes, doorknobs freak me out, but I can control it, and I think thats what matters the most about problems: Its not the problem itself, but how you cope/deal with it.
I enjoy talking to you.
🙂 You sound cool.
Haha, well then, if it made you laugh, there’s a silver lining after all. 🙂
And you’re absolutely right, about coping. I’m glad you can cope with some of your problems. Especially obsessions and delusions. Those are utter madness.
Lastly: Aww, thanks. 🙂 The feeling is mutual.
So, i have to … write this comment without using words that start with the letter “a”… challenge on!
I wonder, is that condition due to you having some bit of extra weight or is it just your perception of it? because if it’s just your perception, i have to put this question on the table: do you get some sort of relief by eating less? i guess partly i’m sort of questioning the why of your decision, not because i want to convince you otherwise, but because there has to be some reasoning behind that decision.
That said, i do eat the minimum sometimes, but it’s mostly because i used to be obese, so i’m kind of obsessed with not going back there. And yup, it took me some good while to find ways of making this comment have sense, while not using the words starting with the “A” letter, lol.
It’s partly dysmorphic perception, and partly the burden of legitimate extra weight. So both.
That last paragraph you wrote? That pretty much explains my own motivation. Formerly obese, and the mere thought of ever returning to that state makes me freeze, makes me panic. Can’t ever go back to that. I won’t allow it. Won’t allow it.
Jesus, then i understand completely. Took me decades to find a healthy compromise between the fear of going back to my former self and eating properly. So… yup, it’s hard dealing with that, but it can be done. People still tell me i’m way too thin at times (which to their eyes i’m pretty sure is true, not to mine) but as long as my weight is above the underweight/normal weight line they can keep their opinions to themselves, heh.
My oldest was over weight her entire childhood. She snuck food all the time. Her pediatrician drove me nuts trying to make me put her on a diet, making me test her for diabetes. I told her nope, not going to do it. Not going to force my daughter, who already has a clusterfuck of problems from her father leaving her, to go on a diet because you don’t like her weight. It would have just made the situation so much worse. I just didn’t stock any binge worthy foods like chips and cookies but she still stashed food in her room. I would go in there to clean and find plates stashed all over the place.
But you know what, I left her alone and she slowly got better. It wasn’t overnight, it wasn’t some kind of magic fix. I just supported her and trusted she would find her own way if I just supported her. She is a normal weight now and has found her peace with food.
I’ll also add she used to slice up her thighs, she still has some scars. They are very faint. She made it through the other side in one piece and has a very healthy outlook on life now. No idea how she did it or how I helped her achieve it or how this even really fits into this thread. Chalk this mini rant up to too much fried rice and diet rootbeer tonight.
Whiskered and Mf: would it be insensitive of me to quote Wallis Simpson by saying “you can never be too thin or too rich” Myself I like the rich part best.
Apples, is that the word?
Algebra, or Airplane, Asparagus
AMSTERDAM
Allergies, Arugula, Alphabet….
Artichoke.
Alabama.
Archimedes?
Alaskan aspirin and adorable associated after an accident are a at any additional all anus April application almost anything
You’re getting warmer…
(Please don’t make me keelhaul you, ToTrees. I like you, and I’d miss you.)
ABRACADABRA! that has to be it!
(yeah i know, not that but… cmon, that one’s magic).
All joking aside, I do care about what happens, and I hope you will be all right.
If she keelhauls me? Be alright? Oh you were talking about that Bearded Clam,
If she keelhauls you, can I have the Hershey bar that was next to the rooster?
Thank you, Cordless. And thank you especially for not trying to change my mind. I appreciate that.
Just stick to meat and Vegi’s fruit but not a lot o fruit just an orange or banana a day
Stop eating bread potato’s rice pasta, and the like,
you will be surprised how quickly your weight goes down.
That’s what I’ve been doing for a while, actually, but I always run out of food and end up relapsing. Because I’m the only one in my house who is on the diet/tries to eat healthy.
I know its freekin hard TOO eat no bread stuffs,,,
.livestrong.com/article/72025-stomach-yeast-infection-symptoms/
Check out this article
The link is broken, I think.
i wish you could see your self as we do..
Thanks, sportsnut, but that’s just it. You don’t even know what I look like.
I bet we would like you anyway, even if we did know.
🙂
no i don’t.. but your soul shimmers
I already like her
Of course you’d still like me as a person. And please, please understand that I’m so very grateful for that. But even so, you would still consider me ugly, probably. And here’s why that matters:
Humans are programmed with a subconscious prejudice against overweight people. That’s just a fact. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, either. It’s an evolutionary thing.
When I was thin for the first time, I was instantly treated better than I ever was as a fat girl. I refuse to let myself be “the ugly one” ever again.
And thanks ToTrees, sportsnut.
you can’t even begin to tell me how I will feel.
But if that’s what you want we can meet and I scream OMG when I see you, HeHe. I’m attracted to women my own age, and I like em thick….. Don’t get me wrong I am Happily Married and It appears that I flirt here,,, Be sure that, that I’m like that to everyone.
I will even get the Shirt
<—- I'm with Ugly.
Thanks, man. Guess you’re right. A bit presumptuous of me to tell you how you’re gonna feel. More than a bit presumptuous.
and you have known from the start you are one of my faves..
I know, and I’m immensely grateful for that. I am.
Like I said, I know that no matter how I look, most of my friends will still be my friends. And that at least I am glad for.
How about joining a gym. Working out will help you both physically and mentally. My membership is not expensive at all and well worth it. Please consider it.
I’ve considered it. It doesn’t even sound like a bad idea— the only thing that’s ever stopped me from doing so is the fact that I still can’t drive, and that I hate exercising (or existing, for that matter) out in public. I could probably get over the second hang-up, though.
Well well, hopefully i don’t sound insensitive but I hope it works out for you.
And yes unfortunately people are wired that way.
its actually a shame society makes people go to such measures. But society is full of judgmental people. Um, i feel, I’m going to sound like a prick here, but I would want to be liked because of what i do, not because of my appearance, I mean, society is meant to be civilized, right? Clearly isn’t..same crap goes on with wild animals…
i give a shit if I’m ‘liked’ but… ok you want people who like you for who you are. Inside..
i cant go on anymore, i just sound like an asshole sorry
I’ll shut up now..
One last… do it for yourself, not to be validated by others (i would not want people in my life to judge me on appearance)…
If you feel it might make you healthier…
I’m sorry. Just forget my whole freaking post!!!!
@ not interested in life.. may i ask you a question
Oh, don’t worry, NIIL, I never mind your comments. We all talk about ourselves on other people’s posts, and that’s alright, in my opinion. We’re here to pull each other up, so, mi casa es su casa.
And you’re right, in any case. I ought to worry about actually being a likable person, whether in personality or in deed, instead of focusing on my appearance. I sound really shallow on this post, in these comments. It’s sad. I don’t consider myself a shallow person, and I don’t want to be one.
I just have lived my entire life with my worth as a human being hinged on my appearance, and now that I’m as old as I am, my programming is now so automatic, so deep seated…that I just have trouble respecting myself if I don’t look the way I’m supposed to.
Ok, I can completely understand the feelings you are having. I have my own long standing food issues or whatever they are. 20 some years and counting. I have had weights from seriously underweight to moderately overweight. I beat myself up about it constantly. I’m not going to tell you to eat (even though food is not the enemy) but I will say try to take care of yourself the best you can.
Thanks, Wintergirl. I will try.
And I agree. Food is not the enemy. I am the enemy.
Wintergirl, have you ever read the book Wintergirls by laurie halse anderson??
Hey Whisky, sorry but don’t. I need to say this, I know what I am saying…. don’t. Please don’t. This is really dangerous. .. so don’t. .. 🙁
Well, I’m willing to listen. But I honestly don’t see how it’s dangerous. Or at least, how it’s more dangerous than eating yourself to death (what I’m currently doing).
Eating disorders are one crazy ride. You start easily, almost always through the idea that eating is a bad thing you can’t control . Truth is body is tricky, and it has needs.
Actually the word disorder is plain it means you get deorganized with how and what you eat, simple and direct word.
But what it doesn’t imply is how much stress it generates to the body the fact your mind is saying that what it needs is bad. So you think, ok easy: deny the need, feeling thin is important. (And it is, it’s related with self stern and with how we relate with the world through our bodies, so it is not superficial at all)
Body has several options, there are three very famus ones: being denied and then afront it in numbness and silen fake resignation (bad thing); or become revelious and making your desire for food more unmanageable, wish means it can either make you want to purge or make you eat non stop.
And no, I am not being dramatic here. The step between having a healthy relationship with food and having a nightmare at hands is so small most people don’t even know when they took it.
And whisky we know we of all people can’t take that risk, we are more vulnerable (and I am sorry if I am talking out of line here).
The road you need to take is one that is more demanding: a reorganization of your relationship with food…
I don’t know if I am making a point here…. 🙁 but it worries me you want to play with fire