FYI: “Psychoface” is my endearing term for a psychiatrist 🙂 Actually, she’s a certified nurse practitioner, but I chose her because she’s a native English speaker. She’s turning out to be no better or worse than the MDs I’ve seen recently, except for this one thing….
Just wondering how many of you have been prescribed antidepressants for bipolar type I or II disorder and of you how many have benefited from them? I was diagnosed bipolar II and general anxiety disorder, and I haven’t read a lot of benefits from taking antidepressants and that it can induce manic episodes (which I don’t need more of).
Just for some background, I was on lithium, lamictal, and clonazepam (PRN) for about 5 years before the lithium seemed to stop working. I was weened off lithium and my dose of lamictal was increased. Then I had to be weened off the lamictal due to a high white blood cell count. I transitioned to gabapentin from lamictal a few months ago, and then the new CNP I’ve been seeing since January prescribed buspirone. I wasn’t sure about the buspirone, but it seems to be helping with the anxiety so that I don’t feel the need to take clonazepam as much. The only problem is that I think that the buspirone in conjuction with the gabapentin is giving me a high/hot flashes, but I had a blood test and spoke with my family doctor and it doesn’t seem like it’s anything more than just side effects, so I guess I can deal with it if the positives outweigh the negatives.
So that’s all well and good, but last time I saw her, the CNP wanted to prescribe zoloft. Despite my reservations, I was just like whatever, but when I read up on it online, it doesn’t seem like it would be good in any way. It seems like she’s focusing too much on the fact that I feel depressed right now and less on the fact that bipolar II isn’t depression. I’ve also told her that I am having trouble controlling my anger (not hitting anyone or trashing anything, but having VERY strong impulses to do so). She said something like, “Don’t you think about walking away when you get angry?” And when I said, “No, I don’t really think about it when I’m in the moment,” she just looked at me like I was insane. I don’t think that it’s abnormal for people to get caught up in anger and not think about walking away….
Anyway, this is a bit of a rant, I guess – I’m just so frustrated and stressed about it. I’ve been to like 3 psychiatrists in (what I consider to be) a relatively short period of time, and I’m getting tired of it. Nothing feels right. Just looking for any advice or general support. Thanks guys.