I think I will finally end it all today. This will be the second time I try to kill myself, but this time I’m not going to take some pills. I have a razor blade next to me and plan to get in the shower and cut myself open. I just wanna tell my story to someone and anyone who is willing to read this. This is not an impulsive thing I’ve been in pain for a very long time and am so tired of trying to hold on. I was bullied all of my life, and no I’m not exaggerating, ever since I started kindergarten I’ve been bullied. My parents got a divorce when I was 8, but for a year before the divorce me and my mom lived with my oma and aunt and cousin. During that whole time I always felt like it was my fault. Now I’ve come to realize that’s partially true. My mom hates me, and as far as she could be concerned she only has my little sister and she’s happy with that. I have no one in this world to understand how I feel about things. I’ve lost everything in my life that ever made me wanna hold on. So, I’m finally done trying, finally done smiling while I bleed and cry inside. I am utterly alone in a world of dark nothingness. I know there are people out there who have lives much worse than mine and if you’re one of those people I’m glad you could find a way to cope with the pain, but I can’t . To everyone who reads this thank you I wish you a much better life than I have had.