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Supposedly, I have daddy issues and that I’m slightly sexually frustrated, even though I haven’t had sex. Is that possible? And what do both of these really mean?

I can’t keep living anymore, I thought I was slightly getting better but I was wrong I feel worse. I just want to die, every night I hope not to wake up the next morning. I hate everything about life there is nothing to look forward to in the future I WISH I WAS DEAD

I am going crazy right now. I’m going back to school tomorrow after a month and a half, and I can’t stop thinking about tomorrow. And my schedule completely changed, so now I don’t even want to go to school anymore. I hate my life. HELP???

I have been going to a high focus center, so I would “get better.” I haven’t gotten better, I’ve been eating less. I want to lose weight. Plus, I’m not allowed to cut myself, so if I can’t cut myself then I’d rather starve myself. My mom asked me the other day, are you trying to make yourself suffer? I told I did it so I would feel something. She knows I’m not eating so I could lose weight. But I tell her that I’m not hungry, and yeah part of that is true. It has officially been a year since I started eating two […]

I know its a horrible thing to always rely on someone or something, because one day I know I’m going to lose it. Like I am in an online relationship, I don’t know whether or not to think of online relationships, REAL Relationships. I mean like him and I have been together for 6 months now I believe, and we used to text each other basically everyday. At first, I had no interest in him because I thought he was going to be like every man-whore that texted me. But after 2 months I started to really like him. Then something had happened where my […]

Ok so I want to write my stories down and other than on here. I need website suggestions. Some websites like WattPad would be great. Even apps would be better too.

Got any suggestions?

We have never met in person or spoken on the phone. Only messaging, we have been talking almost for half a year. When we had first started chatting he said that he was just around the same age as me (he said his age number but I don’t want to mention it on here) and so I felt pretty comfortable. But yesterday he had told me that his birthday is a month after mine. So I thought I was older than him for a second, so I ask him what year he was born and then he tells me that he is 2 years older […]

So I don’t go to regular school anymore, or at least not for now. But right now I’m going to a high focus day school, it has been 3 days going there. I can’t seem to focus at all over there, and I have to do introductions everyday and shit. Ugh and I’m getting medication to help me. I hate knowing that I am going to have to take it. I love the people at the group, but I hate that I am not allowed to have any outside contact with them 🙁  But I also love that I get school work help and I […]

I don’t know why it came to me, but I remembered about the fakes that I have spoken to in the past. So I searched up descriptions of guys, and like that I found out that, there are way more fakes that I’ve talked to. I mean like I was kinda using them too, but they were fake. I told them who I was. Now I feel like shit. I was used. I was going to be used as a sex object by multiple people. Even some that were twice my age. I could’ve been raped. I feel like a fucking piece of shit. Ugh… […]

It’s insane! I might as well be put into a hospital or something. Anything I have to do, someone has to know. This website is hidden though and so is my online friend. If anyone see me talking to him or writing on this site, I’m done for. Even though I gave small hints on these both subjects. But I really can’t do anything without someone knowing. I can’t even throw my trash out without someone having to look at what I’m getting rid of, sometimes if its a note or a paper I would have to wait until I get to school to throw […]

I went to sleep early 2 days ago and I woke up tired. I went to sleep at like midnight last night, and I’m not as tired as I was 2 days ago but I’m still tired. I was doing homework and I fell asleep, and woke up 3 hours later. I told my mom that I just wanted to sleep all day, and she told me, that’s one of the side effects of depression. Yeah she’s right, but I still can’t keep sleeping because I have to go to school. I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. I want to […]

Nothing is going to change my mind about leaving this hell! I can’t do this anymore. Can’t they see that helping me isn’t doing anything. I’m just getting worse! Their help is useless. Their help isn’t doing anything. I give up… wait no… I already gave up, a while ago. I’ve been hanging onto a thread for the past two months. But they came along with the scissors and are cutting the thread. My suicide is getting closer by the second… I can feel it.

I just found boric acid in my house. If you drink it, it does kill you right? And would it burn a lot if swallowed? Or if inhaled would it kill me?

preparing me for high school? This year is pretty much an extra year of high school then.

But if high school is going to just as stressful as this, I don’t think I’m going to go to high school.

Is high school really this stressful???

Am I hungry? Yeah, I am.

Am I going to let it stop me from not having a meal? Of course not.

Every time I get a little hungry I take a cough drop, it gets rid of my hunger.

And it’s only 10 calories.

No weight gained, just another pound lost.

3 meals=3 cough drops=30 calories per day.

It’s perfect!

And if I over dose on the cough drops probably even better.

All I do is keep on eating 2 meals! I ATE 2 MEALS, AGAIN! I know I shouldn’t be eating at all. This whole month I’ve eaten lunch. UGH!!! 3 DAMN POUNDS I’VE GAINED! I’M SO FAT!! I know some of you are going to tell me that it’s no big deal. But to me it means a lot. It’s been 10 months skipping 1 meal a day, but I started skipping lunch too. From then to now I’ve lost 27 pounds without the one meal. Soooo if I skip 2 I’d lose x2 the weight. And I want to lose at least 50 more […]

I don’t feel like going home from school anymore. But I don’t feel like going to school anymore either. Only solution? Running Away

A lot has been going on and all I have been doing was making it worse. My death date in going to be sometime in May 2017. But what I can’t handle, is going on now and I want it to end sooner. In May I have 3 important things that I have to go to. 1. is my grandparents 50th anniversary party, 2. is my aunts wedding and I’m going to be part the whole thing, 3. results if I’m getting into one of the schools I want to get into. If I do it now, I won’t be around to see any of […]