Author

Isolated

Who’s to blame…

by Isolated 8/10/2017

written by Isolated

So I just told my family that I was sexually assaulted a few months ago and my last boyfriend (3 years ago) use to abuse me. They yelled at me for creating my own drama.

The reason I finally told them was because when I was assulted I was at a gig wearing a low cut top. After it happened I blamed myself. I shouldn’t of worn that, it was my own fault. After about 2 weeks I realised that if a person gets raped it’s not their fault no matter what they were wearing! It’s always the offenders fault. I wasn’t raped but I […]

8/10/2017 4 comments

What do I do?

by Isolated 7/12/2017

written by Isolated

Okay so usually the depression and anxiety is constant without any particular reason as to why I feel that way. I’m sure you all get that and know what it’s like. However I currently have a problem and I don’t know how to fix it. I have been isolating myself, trying to ignore it but obviously this is only making me feel worse. So please tell me what the right thing is to do. I am already a piece of shit and I don’t fancy the idea of hurting those around me.

They story begins with me and my best friend. Everyone thought we were an […]

7/12/2017 5 comments

Please help me.

by Isolated 5/11/2017

written by Isolated

I was anxious for a month. Every day I would wake up feeling anxious. Living in fear of when the next panic attack would take over. Then one day it went. I didn’t wake up anxious. I was so so relieved. Unfortunately, this only lasted a few seconds. Then I sunk into depression. A depression that keeps on going and is consuming me at a rapid pace. Its worse by myself. I can’t get out of bed for most of the day. I’m tired all the time. There is no point. I can’t stop thinking about dying. Sometimes when I’m with other people I feel […]

5/11/2017 5 comments

I Ruin Things

by Isolated 4/28/2017

written by Isolated

I ruin things. I can’t help it. It’s what I do. It’s who I am.
Every time something is going right for me i sabotage it on purpose. I don’t knowingly do this at the time but when I look back I know that I have screwed it up for myself and that maybe deep down I can’t help but do this.

I’m also a quitter. I quit things all the time. As soon as someone praises me on my abilities I quit. But as soon as someone tells me to stop, that what I am doing is unhealthy or wrong. It becomes an addiction. […]

4/28/2017 2 comments

People are selfish

by Isolated 4/14/2017

written by Isolated

Life was going well. I was coping. Yes there are still weeks where it’s hard and the depression and anxiety completely takes over but I was handling it. But now I’m not.

Most days I am anxious and depressed for no particular reason. But now my mind won’t switch off and it’s making everything ten times worse and I don’t want to leave the house, I don’t want to see my family for Easter. I just want to dissapear.

I am a loyal person. I drove 3 hours after uni/work all day just for a friends birthday. On my birthday she didn’t even bother to show up […]

4/14/2017 2 comments

I can Live

by Isolated 6/5/2016

written by Isolated

It use to only be when I was alone that I thought about dying and killing myself. But tonight while I was out clubbing with my friends all I could think about was death and how much easier it would be. As I stood there trying to dance I looked around at all the other people of the dance floor and they looked so happy and carefree and I just couldn’t help but think how stupid it was because life is pointless.

It’s funny. I never published this post because my friend came and jumped in my bed because she could tell I was upset and […]

6/5/2016 2 comments

I want to be wanted…

by Isolated 5/3/2016

written by Isolated

I sit alone in my house, overwhelmed by emptiness which I must admit sounds like a strange sensation. It began in my chest and climbed its way up my throat and just sat there. The pressure is unbearable and it is a struggle to breathe. I can feel my heartbeat pounding in my head and I lay down and concentrate on my breathing. Breathing in I try and count to 9 then attempt to hold the air in my lungs for 9 seconds before breathing out slowly for 9 seconds. I read online that this was meant to help. It does to an extent. Although […]

5/3/2016 2 comments