For general topics related to the site.
its not the same but its getting more familiar and easier. its hard to forget the past when the past is so painful and still fresh. every time i see her i think of that one post. So i pack another bowl and take another hit to forget it. But i swear her words are burned into my brain. I wish i could tell her but i feel like i would break down and thats the last thing i need. I need to be fine but im afraid its getting bad again.Â
Since I was seventeen I have suffered from an anxiety disorder so that’s four years now. It gets better then it gets worse. The constant up and down exhausts me so much. I have tried all types of treatments and I consider myself quite a worldly and wise person for my age. I have tried much self therapy and my own things to help with recovery but I have only gotten so far and fallen back in the hole that is my disorder. I have contemplated suicide numerous times but have never actually attempted it. I’m sick of it and I’m just tired so tired. […]
This Saturday, I’m going to a One Republic concert. I was really excited because I was bringing my best friend Kathrine and my other friend Morgan. Morgan and I used to be best friends, but she started ignoring me this year. In school, she would give me these short bullshit answers every time I tried to talk to her. We used to sit right next to each other, but she put two people between us. And then when we got home from school she would text me, acting as if she’d never done those things. So, I started ignoring her outside of school. She got […]
Is it wrong to leave suicde letters? Does it just make things worse when you are gone?
Each day that I wake up I am just adding time onto my pain. I distract myself with T.V , this website and the internet to keep from killing myself. The urge is there. Sometimes I feel this deep rage inside me and a voice screams in my head “YOU NEED TO FUCKIN KILL YOURSELF” and I have to convince myself that the time isnt right now. Why am I lying to myself? I think is just the will to live. My heart, mind and spirit are all at war within me. My heart and mind says its over and this is the end but […]
To whomever reads this
I see a therapist to deal with my anxiety disorder that is heavily plagued with panic attacks and I am often ‘scared’ into a state of immobility where I cannot think move or breathe for short periods of time.
Anyway, we were discussing characteristics of what a person with anxiety exhibits and whether there are any common links. He had studied all his patients (and aside from other details he wasn’t able to release under confidentiality laws) he was able to tell me 64% of his patients were aquarius.
It is funny that this statistic exists. A profiling overview of an aquarius person states […]
I think I finnally understand why you people want to kill yourself and why my brother killed himself. I guess you have this image of what you want to be and a totally opposite image of what you think you are. You think about yourself in a very negative way and “all” you want is to be is perfect,so you would stop letting everybody down. And you just cant change. You stay the same negative person and you want to be positive more than ever. This gap between who you are and who you want to be is getting bigger and bigger until… Someone said, […]
So, I have been planning on suicide on the 3rd next month. People are telling me not too but, I literally can’t take the pain anymore. I cut last night and I was clean for more than 3 months! But, anyways here’s my pointless story..
So, Last year. ‘8-3-12’ I kinda thought I was in love.
About a couple months into our relationship it was getting a little depressed.
The guy, Jt, told me he loved me everything and then a couple days later,
He just left me and told me everything was getting taken away from him,
his phone,ps3, home phone, etc.
So, I said […]
“6. An artist’s relation to suicide:
– Suicide is a crime against life
– An artist should not commit suicide
– An artist should not commit suicide
– An artist should not commit suicide “
(Marina Abramovic, ‘An Artist’s Life Manifesto’)
Let’s create, then. Let’s protect ourselves from death by becoming artists.
I am scared that I will kill myself one of these days.
I am a Christian. I was raised in an environment that told me suicide is a sin (the whole suicide is the murder of oneself, and murder is a no-no).
I am an immigrant. My parents emigrated from their birth place so I could have a better future. I’m tired of being such a failure to them. I know that I’ve fallen way short from their expectations and I feel like I’ve failed them when they’ve placed so much hope in me. I feel like I’m a waste of space, a financial drain on them. […]
I need help. I don’t know what to do.. How can I get help? Nothing seems to matter anymore and I’m afraid of suicide… Where do I go? What do I do?
I can’t get this girl out of my head and its slowly driving me insane.
who ever reads this, Hi to you.
I salute myself that I have got the courage to create an account and post my first story that I always kept in my heart. My story in short, I still LOVE him. I spent the best five years with him and all of a sudden we broke up and we both love each other, shall I blame it to the circumstance? or blame us?
Now two years past, my feelings are the same. I LOVE HIM. no day passes without thinking of him and checking all his social media accounts 🙁
Tell me how can I ignore my heart and move […]
These were the BEST TIMES OF MY FUCKIN LIFE. part of the reason Im so fucked up now is that I cant let go of these days. EVERYTHING was better back then. Music, entertainment,sports,the economy,food,places, just everything. Today is all Facebook, twitter and instagram. I dont have any of these things. nothing against them I just dont do social media nowadays but back them myspace kicked so much ass. From Michael Jordan to Michael Jackson the sports and music was WAY better. Rap actually had more lyrical content than “so much money this’ and “so many bitches that”. Sugar Ray was the shit hell I […]
I’ve been fighting off my own severe depression for 29 years, rather successfully, with an attitude that depression isn’t real, and thoughts about ending my life are just me being weak and unable to handle problems. But this tactic worked better when I was younger with opportunity ahead of me and the “my future will be bright” keeping me going; now that I’m 29, over educated and underemployed, fighting off depression with sheer will is becoming harder and harder, and the suicidal plans come easier and are more realistic and acceptable in my mind.
It’s less than day to day now; it’s hour to […]
Dear Readers.
Wow, that sounds weird for some one as new as me, because i tend to not gain attention, Internet-wise or not, but thats besides the point. I am a 13 year old girl, nothing special, and to be honest, i’m not that serious of a case, compared to other people, But what my problem is that i suffer from my negative emotions, and i do mean it quiet  literally. Let me try to clear this up for you. For example, lets assume that you and i used to be really close, but then our relationship… fails. Like i wasn’t as great as a friend then you […]
All my life I have been bullied and felt like I’m worth nothing. But I put it aside and just tried to move on. But then this year I met a girl and we became friends really fast and we became so close. I never knew she would be the one to push me over the edge to make me break. One night she called me stuff that all the bullies would call me. And that broke me. I trusted her and she broke me. After that I became really depressed but I don’t think she ever realized it is because of what […]
For years, I’ve felt helplessly depressed. But through it all I had some mysterious and sometimes unwanted glimmer of hope keeping me moving on. I waited in my solitary shell for something to destroy the barrier I’ve built around myself and take me into a life worth living. I watched the world go by, knowing that I’ll never be like the beautiful people, the successful people. But that voice in my head kept telling me that there’s still hope for me. I hoped, and still do, to grow old and look back to say: “I’m proud of who I am”. But that voice that kept […]
I really have to STOP eating.
I have to stop, I must make myself perfect for Mike.
I can never make it anywhere if  I stay where I am now.
NO FOOD!!
I am done being an ugly, worthless, ***** that no one likes!
I will forcibly change,
I just wanna be important to you . . .
My mother hates me. I dont know why she does, I have four siblings and she nevertalks to them the way she does me. She’s always looking fr something to shout at me for. I lost count of how many times she’s told me to go kill my self or how she wishes that one morning she’d wake up and find me dead. I’ve no one to talk to and it hurts. Growing up all I knew was abuse from my mom and brother she hit me with text books for getting wrong answers when I was 6 years old. When we would go out […]
Please log in to report posts