Category:

General

For general topics related to the site.

The terror of a phone

by Purmi 6/29/2012

written by Purmi

I haven’t been paying my student loan. I CAN’T pay my student loan. Dad found the letter from.. well, whatever that place is called in english.

Mom has me calling the student loan people, but i can’t. I can’t dial the fucking phone!

When she first confronted me, i just.. flipped. Started crying and what not, and she said some mean things, saying how none of her kids ever grown up, and she’s right. I’m 21 and i can’t make a fucking phone call.

In the end i wound up screaming to her about how I’ve been wanting to kill myself since i was 12, but […]

6/29/2012 5 comments

I’ve always been lonely. It’s like I don’t belong at all( new to this site)

by suchalonglastname 6/29/2012

written by suchalonglastname

Hello everyone. I don’t understand my depression and often times I want to kill myself for being so goddamn fucking stupid and putting my boyfriend through hell. Me and my brother both have clinical depression. This isn’t something that can be fixed with just “positive thinking”. We need our anti-depressents. I hate to say the most cliche thing any depressed person could ever say but I really have always been a lonely person who never could hold a friendship. Kids wouldn’t tease me,They would belittle me. This isn’t what has made me depressed but this has shaped my lack of social skills. This world and […]

6/29/2012 3 comments

Pushed off a cliff

by confused3077 6/29/2012

written by confused3077

today I decided to tell someone I trust about how I’m feeling and how close I’m getting to suicide. And he blew up at me, telling me I was selfish and livin in my own delusional world. Thought it would take some heat off of me having someone know. Just made me feel worse because now I feel like hes gunna see me as broken. And the only thing he could say to me is that I need to see a professional, and not for one second could he understand I’m hurt and just wanting to heal but I want to do it on my […]

6/29/2012 6 comments

Who gives a fuck anymore?

by Rain 6/29/2012

written by Rain

Broken. Used. Lonely. Abused. Ignored.
But who gives a fuck anymore?
Fuck you. Im glad you dont ask how im feeling. I dont fucking know myself.
How am I supposed to feel?
Why am I supposed to live?
I think I’m supposed to die…

6/29/2012 7 comments

I feel so old

by Lexlolington 6/29/2012

written by Lexlolington

I turned 21 earlier this mont. Even though im mucch like a child, I feel so jaded and far from my memories. This is my last real birthday worth celebrating. All down hill from here. For about 6 months i’ve been making some feeble attempts at planning a future. I cant bring myself to actively work towards it. I dont want to work or study the rest of my days away. I dont care to date, or try to keep up with the jones. Im bitter. Im lonely aznd i’ve learned that life is nothing but a series of ups and downs. Most people […]

6/29/2012 3 comments

They’re My Everything…

by Absentee32 6/29/2012

written by Absentee32

Im scared. A little over a month ago my girlfriend of almost 7 years moved in with her dad in another state. We have a 4 year old son together and he means the world to me. I was diagnosed as a type 1 diabetic when I was just 14 and have been living with it every day of my life. Ive never suffered from depression, I just seemed to bottle up my illness and not think about it until a couple years ago. It seemed like I couldn’t hold on to a job very long and wasn’t very motivated to work.

Im actually not in […]

6/29/2012 6 comments

Wowza

by supern0vaa 6/29/2012

written by supern0vaa

I haven’t been on this website since April. Holy moly is that ever a long stretch.
Just needed something to vent onto.
I’ve had a countdown for 200+ days until my friend came home from a school exchange from Spain. She came home on the 22nd, I was very excited to see her.
On the 20th of June I had surgery on my throat and nose, that caused me a lot of pain that I am extremely good at hiding. I was and still am in constant pain but no one ever comments on it because they think I am just that strong. Â I found […]

6/29/2012 0 comment

Best way to ask for help?

by Crazypandachick 6/29/2012

written by Crazypandachick

I realise now that I have a problem. Actually scrap that, I always knew. The difference is that I am now ready to admit that I have a problem. So much has happened in my life and being the stubborn person I am, I pushed it all inside and pretended it didn’t matter. Now it has all come at me at once. Flashes of trauma, whether they be emotional, physical and even the few sexual from my past have come back and I can no longer live normally. I don’t sleep (without medication or alcohol), I barely eat, I’m always so sad, angry or anxious. […]

6/29/2012 2 comments

confused beyond believe!!!

by sbkstep43 6/29/2012

written by sbkstep43

my ex girlfriend’s boyfriend want to have sex with me because she cheated on him with me…….HUH?

i moved on 4 months ago so why now…something always kills my happiness

not this time…….POSITIVE thats their problem not mine

STRENGTH…..haha not there!!!!

6/29/2012 0 comment

I Need Help

by talkinghead1 6/28/2012

written by talkinghead1

I’ve been taking antidepressants for years and they work for a while but then the black moods always come back. I switched my meds again but I just don’t feel right. I wish I had the money to see a psychotherapist on a weekly basis but I don’t. I just really need some one to talk to. If I thought that shooting heroin into my veins would help me I would try it. I feel so desperate and alone. I love my daughter so much and I know that if I killed myself it would really mess up […]

6/28/2012 1 comment

Advice?

by softballer58 6/28/2012

written by softballer58

I’ve been having problems with , fighting with my mom and boyfriend, and they have caused me to think twice about whether I want to be here anymore. She makes me feel neglected, unwanted and a barrier in her life. She knows she is hurting me but doesn’t care. I have never actually followed through with hurting myself but really put thought into it. With my boyfriend he is CONTROLLING. He thinks I have to be next to him 24-7 and i just can’t do it. We fight constantly and I feel I just can’t get away. HELP?

6/28/2012 5 comments

Why Me?

by StayStrong 6/28/2012

written by StayStrong

Its almost the summer, and i feel alittle paniced. Ive decided i would like to die in the summer time, none of my friends will every know im gone next year at school. However life has basically just put an obsticle in my way. my best guy friend, i now have feelings for. maybe i even love him?(even puppy love) Its taring me in two. a part of me wants him BAD. I feel jealous when i see him with other girls, when he posts heart on other girls walls. I want him so bad and i dont know why. I just want to kiss […]

6/28/2012 1 comment

Smashed into pieces.

by Empty_Soul 6/28/2012

written by Empty_Soul

I haven’t posted for a while,
Not a lot has changed I’ve began to see a psychologist again. But the reasons for that boil down to the decision I made on last weekend.

I couldn’t cope anymore, as my last post states.. I didn’t know if I would attempt again.. But something set me off on Friday.
At first I tried to squash the thought out of my head..
But it kept coming back. It felt just like any other day lately.. Dull, boring and grey. I walked into the pharmacy at the end of my street, placed my script on the bench and nodded at […]

6/28/2012 6 comments

Anger

by StrandedSelkie 6/28/2012

written by StrandedSelkie

Okay, so I’m sorry I don’t really have anything new to tell, but I’m having a hard time dealing with anger atm and wondered if anyone know any productive, non-destructive ways to get rid of it? As I wrote in my last post my parents basically re-triggered my childhood trauma again recently, and since I’ve been crying all day, alternating with bouts of anger and a general feeling of being ” out of it”, while they’ve continued living their lives happily as if nothing had been, which makes me even angrier. I shouldn’t allow them to make me feel this way, I was relatively happy […]

6/28/2012 3 comments

I’m disgusting.. I deserve to die, can’t bring myself to do it.

by Qwerty123 6/28/2012

written by Qwerty123

Okay, i’m 13 years old. I have to repeat the 7th grade. I would’ve passed it, but i left my school 3 weeks early. That school stressed me out, to the point where i just couldn’t do it. i never wanted to go back there again. i only had about 2-3 friends at the end of the year. i like, pushed everyone away. i don’t even know how. right now, it’s about a month and a half into summer. i moved across town, so i’m going to be starting a new school. i lost connection with all my friends from my previous school, but like […]

6/28/2012 6 comments

Window of Opportunity

by loco2164 6/28/2012

written by loco2164

A couple of days ago I believed today would be the day to get this done, finally, once and for all, no more hand-wringing, no more excuses. I was prepared to deal with the dreaded pain I knew it would take to do the deed. But wouldn’t you know it, the time frame when my will was the strongest my plans were thwarted because I didn’t get to be alone like I needed to be to carry out my plan. Of late it is almost comical how bad my luck has been!!!!!!!!!! Obviously I know I just have to bide my time and wait for […]

6/28/2012 1 comment

Anyone here from England?

by Julesplus3 6/28/2012

written by Julesplus3

6/28/2012 4 comments

thursday.

by evildandelions 6/28/2012

written by evildandelions

Everything’s been making me cry. Â I cried though my entire math class yesterday. Â And it’s a 2 and a half hour class.

I don’t know how to do things anymore. Â It takes me forever to get things done and I feel so fucking stupid. Â I can work on a math problem for hours and still not be any closer to solving it. Â I don’t know how I’m going to pass that test on Monday.

I’m trying another mood stabilizer, but it’ll be another week or two before I’m on a full dose, and even then I don’t really expect it to do anything. Â Except the side effects, […]

6/28/2012 2 comments

I don’t know what to do with myself

by RJo 6/28/2012

written by RJo

I don’t want to die-on most days. But sometimes I get so depressed it seems like a good solution. It just passes my mind out of the blue when I’m crossing a river or crossing the street. What if.

I thought I’d had it all figured out by now and it’s not like that. Not knowing what to do with your life at 20 isn’t a good idea. I feel like I’m gonna screw up, alone with a boring job I hate, surrounded by people I have nothing in common with, my parents are going to be so disappointed.They are going to die and I’ll […]

6/28/2012 5 comments

Birthday, or deathday?

by confused3077 6/28/2012

written by confused3077

Can’t stop thinking about how bad I dont want to be here. My birthday is a little over a week away (July 7th) and I’m thinking maybe I’ll take some kind of pills maybe muscle relaxers before i drink and drink A LOT. Just making it easier for everyone so they only have one day to remember me, cuz I was born and died on the same day. I want this to be the best birthday ever, have friends come out and just drink and get hammered and have fun, in turning 20, it should be fun! Now I don’t want to do anything.

I […]

6/28/2012 9 comments

Newer Posts

Older Posts