I have a wife and a great mam and dad. I feel selfish for wanting to kill myself as I know it will finish these people. I have tried tablets before and ended up in hospital for a day or so! I was 23 at the time, unhappy with my friends, my job and being lonely! am no longer alone but lately (last two years) I’ve just hit rock bottom. I’ve made it to 32 years old and feel the world as nothing more to show or offer me! I feel emotionless writing these words as I’ve heard them in my head so many times […]
Category:
My Suicide Note
I’m fucking done with this world, I’m sick of being so alone. I have no one to turn to. My fucked up brain ends up making me no fun to be around. I have severe deppresion, bipolar disorder, ADD and insomnia. So I stay up all night constantly imagining what the ceiling would look like if it were painted with my brains. I’m not a bad person, I do everything in my power to help others and do the right thing. But it always backfires. I’m so close to ending it , i’ve been like this for years. The only reason I haven’t gone through […]
I don’t want to live for another minute. I’m 22 and I don’t want to make it to 23. I’m sick of being alone. I’m sick of having no friends, no one to turn to, and no one to rely on. I was put on this earth with a fucked up brain. I have bipolar disorder which goes hand in hand with the severe depression. And if that wasn’t enough, I have insomnia that keeps me up at night and ADD so I can never concentrate for more than 5 fucking minutes. I hate it. I haven’t felt happy for so god damned long. Being […]
Hi
I wrote a poem to my mother and I will give it to her 31 may on mother’s day.
I’m planning to suicide the next day. I have waited to suicide just because i wanted to be there for my mom on mothers day. It will be the last time.
I just want to know what you think of the poem. Any improvements? There’s a hidden message as you can see. I hope she wont be suspicious? She doesnt know im suicidal.
This will be the last thing i do before I die so no suicide letter. If you wonder why it’s because if I fail I don’t […]
Hey (goodbye).
I’m kinda messed up right now, I’m feeling pretty bad though I could probably stop feeling this way; I just don’t want to. I’m not sure why but I kind of enjoy feeling sad, I guess in the same way that I like self-harm; maybe it’s the same thing. This probably isn’t healthy but I’m not, so it might be alright. I guess I’m just fucked, I hate myself and I think I might kill myself tomorrow not that it matters.
I’ll go to the student services room at school, sign off there, catch the train home and hang myself.
I’m sure it […]
The music I always loved to hear lost their charm.
The DXM I treated as substitutes for real anti-depressants have lost their appeal.
I no longer linger in anticipation waiting for the next part of the show/comic I follow.
I don’t even feel excited at the prospect of having a family in the future anymore; now it just sickens me knowing that there is a possibility that I may give birth or raise a child that would end up as fucked up as I am. It frightens me that the person I would be with in the future would suffer because of my mental issues.
Besides, if I off […]
I’m gonna fucking kill myself soon, I almost did today, but like all the other times I backed out because I’m a fucking failure and a coward. I’m sorry to everyone for having to know that I exist, but don’t worry because I’m going to be gone soon.
Never occurred to me I could be in a world with so many people and yet feel so alone. Used to think talking would help. It did. But then i lived long enough to grow up. Talking is a waste of time and i dont care to trouble people with my issues. Rough life … Sure but i know others have had it worse than me. My mind and spirit isnt better than the next person nor my tolerace and ability to recover. There is no organ transplant for a damaged spirit. Religion and relationships are wishful thinking. I earn my living helping to ease […]
I fell through
Down into the blue
The tide’s taking me away
I know I can’t stay
It’s been nice to know you
But I have to go too
Don’t we all?
After we’ve had a fall
And I’ve fallen too low
So now you know
The extent of my sorrow
It’s longer than tomorrow
You’ll hear me cry
Forever till I die
Hanging loose
From a noose
I dunno why I was even born cause I have no purpose on this world. I used to think life could get better for people who are unhappy but for me it doesn’t work like that. I wrecked the one good thing I have ever had in my whole life and now I’ve lost them for good they want nothing to do with me anymore cause I let him down so many times. I feel like I have no one now because I only spoke to him about everything everyday I’d talk to him and now he’s not wanting me in his life anymore 🙁 […]
I’m not a human being to anyone. All my friends are fake and liars, full of shit, false hopes and false promises.
The guy I had fallen for bitches endlessly about how alone he is, how bad he wants someone, and how he needs to be loved bit ignores me like I don’t exist. No response means that I don’t matter and I don’t count for shit. As I never have in life.
Even people here are wrong and full of it. My only replies are on what women want and how to get a woman when I have said I am not interested in women! I […]
It’s obvious I’m not okay. For gods sake I’m a twelve year old suicidal. So why do I stay alive? I’m young, I’ve made nothing for myself yet. Who would even care? I get bullied for wearing glasses. Pushed for looking different. So I dont care. One day I will do it. Probably some day soon.
Something about this so called life that I am living seems artificial. As if I am the punch line to a very cruel joke. I’m overwhelmed more often than not about what it means to take my own life. In my mind it’s simple. Numerous ways to end my suffering or finish the joke before I’m thrown down a whirlwind of continuos pain yet again. I’m suicidal almost daily. When I think I can handle taking my life I know I can’t and I break down at the thought of leaving behind loved ones. I would tell a therapist but that would get me committed […]
I’m sorry I just can’t do this anymore. I’m done with hope. I’m done with everything. I’ve lost everything and there is nothing left for me. I don’t want to live anymore. And there is no use for me anyway. Nobody will change my mind. I’ve already chosen what to do. I can’t even cry anymore. I’m not scared to die anymore. I am 100% sure of what I should do. And nobody will ever change my mind. This life is hell. And I don’t want to deal with it anymore. I will be free and so happy. And so will everybody else.
This is not […]
God is boring . boring God . why human’s imagination & fantasy is better than God boring reality ? why God is boring ?
by niki
written by niki
God is boring . boring God .
why human’s imagination & fantasy is better than God boring reality ?
why God is boring ?
I hate this world . I hate this life . I hate life .
This world is so boring , boring world !
This life is so boring , boring life ! life is boring .
Why movies , games , anime / manga, & fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
everyday life is the same : wake up, eat, go to school/work, boring, then go back home, […]
Im not sure why Im here..I have no guts to commit suicide..but lately I ve been thinking that i want to free my soul from sadness and heart pain. I pray and ask to aamy Creator everyday ..if I can get my ticket for going home soonest. I cant take any longer..and Im really affraid to face the reality of my life tomorrow.
I’m scared. What is in the other side? I don’t believe in God or religion. I’m about to leave… I love you my flame… Help me.
I love him more than I love myself. I love him more than breathing. The only thing keeping me here is my boyfriend, the flame that keeps me warm eventhough all I feel is the paralyzingly coldness around me. I don’t want to leave him but I can’t stay anymore. What do I do? What can I do that if I do leave this world he will move on, that he won’t blame himself, that he’ll still be happy. I’m tore between my pain and my love, the only good thing left in my heart.
Hello everyone who’s reading and thank you for taking the time. My name Blargyness, which is obviously pen name, I’m 25 from Manila, Philippines. I’ve been suffering depression since I was 16 so give or take 9 years. When I was 16 i first committed suicide and I think I never recovered. I have a psychiatrist but lately I feel my end is nearing…
I do not have the most understanding people around me about my condition. Depression is not something really “real” here in the Philippines. Well save one person, my boyfriend. I am trying so hard not to give in. I said and […]
My life’s not really going anywhere. I’ve got a lot of debt, no good job prospects, and I’ve given up trying. Some of my friends keep trying to help. Words of encouragement that by themselves don’t do jack fuck to change reality, A couple links to some stupid career builder websites and suggestions to keep checking Indeed, as if I haven’t done similar things or thought of that already. Yes, it could work eventually, maybe, but there’s more than that. I want a lover… Just, I’m tired of wondering how much longer I have to deal with this bullshit. So, I’m going to try to […]