Category:

My Suicide Note

given up

by kateralia 9/1/2014

written by kateralia

I am so beyond lowest of low points that I have given up on everything. I couldnt be bothered showering, brushing my teeth, washing clothes even eating. I don’t sleep one day just so I can sleep through the next. I am in immense pain from my back and my rotting teeth.

I once cared so much about my health and my appearance. Where did it go wrong?

Finally my doctor is listening to me & trying to help. Why now after nearly a year of seeing him, telling him my troubles, what I want to do, does he now want to do something?

I made my very […]

9/1/2014 5 comments

pointless

by shadowmask 8/31/2014

written by shadowmask

I told my bestfriends i think of suicide everynight. Of course i didnt just randomly bring up the suject. They demand to know whats wrong. Then when i tell them they say oh you already told me that. Okay so did you want to know for your health? they didnt even give a fuck. Confiding in other people is pointless

8/31/2014 10 comments

another day failed

by kateralia 8/27/2014

written by kateralia

Yet another day has passed & I have failed. Or is it life has failed me?

What is the point in trying if all you do is fail.

I’ll never have another partner, I’ll never have a family. I’ll never afford another car, I’ll never travel again. I’m stuck in this one place, in this glass box that I can see out of but noone can see me. I’ll wither away in this empty box, never having what my soul yearns for most.

8/27/2014 11 comments

Waiting

by hooded_girl 8/27/2014

written by hooded_girl

I’m waiting for someone to save me, because I can’t save myself anymore. Superman? God? Man? Woman? Child? Someone…..? I need to start over or end it… I can’t live like this anymore. I am tired of wishing on stars and counting cars.

I am so tired of pretending everything is ok…. I know it isn’t, and I am done lying to myself. I am done trying to make myself look happy when I’m not. I can’t anymore. I’m broken… And I know there’s no fixing this time.

8/27/2014 1 comment

Understanding the Damned

by KissOfDeath 8/26/2014

written by KissOfDeath

I don’t expect you to understand,

no one ever does.

Our own mental status should be controlled by our own hands.

We are all condemned to death,

so why are we just sitting around?

Like ticking time bombs,

why not handle our own miserable lives,

instead of allowing others to choose our fate.

8/26/2014 2 comments

If my suffering could be manifested physically, I’m sure everyone would be okay with me leaving

by timetogonow 8/26/2014

written by timetogonow

First time I tried to kill myself, I was 16. I overdosed and was hospitalised. I was raped and bullied. I left hospital and ignored calls from the police.

For the next five years, I felt myself losing a sense of who I was. A straight-A, goody two shoes, quit college (UK meaning of the word). I started over, but skipped school a lot. I ended up getting two As and a B at A Level. I got into a good university to study law, but I think they just wanted my money from international fees. I got a 2:1 with honours, but by the scrape […]

8/26/2014 2 comments

Hurting

by Scarlett Dawn 8/25/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

I cry, but I shed no tears
I’m hurting, but I’m not bleeding
I’m dying, but my body’s surviving
I’ve been broken, but my scars don’t show

I’m withering away, but my body’s still ageing
I’ve lost sight of a future, but I am not blind
I cannot voice my angst, but I am not mute
I feel numb inside, but I can still feel my heart beating

I’ve lost my motivation, but I am still walking
I cannot breathe, but my lungs are still functioning
I cannot feel, but my pain still taunts me
I’ve lost the war, but I am still fighting my battle

8/25/2014 3 comments

2 of the worst things

by bookshelf 8/25/2014

written by bookshelf

Hi, I’m new here so I’m not entirely sure how all this posting works but I thought I should start off explaining how I’m feeling and how I’ve been feeling for a while now.

From the outside my life looks pretty damn great but actually living the way I do is unbearable.

This time 2 years ago I was self harming and contemplating suicide. I then went on to try and commit suicide last May, which obviously didn’t go according to plan but it did wind me up on 24 hr watch until august at which point my doctor and parents gave me permission to go to […]

8/25/2014 2 comments

She just wants to go home…

by Suicides-Angel 8/25/2014

written by Suicides-Angel

So I’m 19…and supposedly a girl who has the world going for me. I’m “pretty” and smart and everyone loves me.

So they tell me. When I was 11, my mom abandoned me to a city who devoured me like the storm devours ships. I was gangraped nightly, used, abused, beaten…..starved, and tied to a bed for days at a time.

I’ve suffered losing everyone close to me, either being left or God takes them from me.

I found a guy that loved me for everything I was….and man I feel hard. And I was doing okay….until May 2nd, 2014 when I lost my daughter, Dylan Michelle…at 6:30 […]

8/25/2014 10 comments

Session 19: Read between the lines.

by R3T31D 8/24/2014

written by R3T31D

Part of me still hopes for a safe resolution, maybe find someone that is not a religious crack head to try to repair me? Is just false hope, I know that. I’ve known that for some time. I wonder why I kept holding on to this noise. I knew that everyone was going to walk away, to move on.

Everyone moves on, in the end we are nothing but memories that linger in time and eventually fade into nothing. Unless you find one of those people that can never forget. If such a thing even exists.

I’ve been researching more locations in the area that […]

8/24/2014 4 comments

Apologetic

by Scarlett Dawn 8/24/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

I am not ungrateful for the aid they provided me with. I am not ungrateful for the compassion they showed me. I am not ungrateful for messages they tried to send.

My incapability to be ungrateful has made me surrender to the guilt of being apologetic.

I am so sorry for all the time that was wasted in your attempts to fix me. I am so sorry for having taken up a bed for someone that was potentially in a more crucial state of deep despondency than I.

I do not fear dying.

I fear what I am leaving behind.

My loved ones, my future, my pain.

Yet I simply cannot carry […]

8/24/2014 2 comments

Careless

by Scarlett Dawn 8/24/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

I hate the stench of stale tobacco on my clothes. I hate the sensation of being far from reality when the drugs attack my body and mind. I hate the lack of sensibility when the devils nectar poisons my brain. I hate stealing from the oblivious shopkeepers. I hate driving when intoxicated and drugged, smiling at the police officers that watch me beaming- as though they gather I have nothing to hide behind my misleading smile. I hate when the doctors tell me I am doing fine.

I’ve long perfected the ability to play the game right and pretend that I am same.

As I drive down the […]

8/24/2014 12 comments

Fuck this world.

by taipan67 8/23/2014

written by taipan67

No words can ever express THE FULL EXTENT of how fed up and done with this steaming pile of dogshit we call human society, on this rock, in this universe with these laws of physics, as I am. I’ve surpassed the thin boundaries of apathetic, I am a void with human form. The unbelievably idiotic things I hear people say and think on a regular basis make me want to use a metal baseball bat to smash their heads in. The gene pool is polluted by people who should’ve been strangled several times over already. Fuck they’re dumb as rocks.

Maintain, maintain, maintain, maintain, and maintain. […]

8/23/2014 17 comments

Pill Bottles lined up. Numbness taking over

by CMZ 8/23/2014

written by CMZ

I don’t really know why I am posting here or why it is that I am sharing this with strangers.

I think all the things happening in my life right now that have driven me over the edge are irrelevant.

The anxiety and pain are almost gone and I feel completely numb.

I thought about Suicide before, many times. And every time I got very close.

Right now I am as close to finalizing it as never before, being alone in a hotel room, away from my loved ones, with 7 bottles of prescription pills lined up in the side table.

And the silly thing is, all I can think […]

8/23/2014 3 comments

What am I still doing here?

by Scarlett Dawn 8/23/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

I question my existence every waking minute. It doesn’t matter if I’m awake or asleep, I live within nightmares whether lucid or subconsciously. I have tried everything to change my mind but there is nothing left for me here. I fear myself to be a burden to those whom I love and in my demise I feel as though I would free them of their constant angst due to the worry they possess for me. The problem is; I don’t want to die! But I am not living. This is not living. I am merely respiring, merely going through the motions of being alive. Yet […]

8/23/2014 3 comments

just another drop in the ocean…

by kara 8/23/2014

written by kara

So I don’t know if this will help, or make me feel worse, but I’m finding it difficult to deal with the present moment so I need to do something – anything – to avoid sinking lower.

Earlier this year I realized something about myself that I could no longer deny. I am transgender. It was the most intense thing I’ve ever experienced to have all of these things just click in a moment, and then no matter what I did, it was all I could think about.

At first, I just thought about what it would be like to have been born the gender I felt […]

8/23/2014 3 comments

Goodbye

by ERRORLIFE 8/22/2014

written by ERRORLIFE

Love is a murder! Finally i give it up, i cant defeat my fate.might be is fate lead me in the way that i should go? Here is only way i can go is commint suicide .Im so lost and the voice inside my head keep saying that off myself is the only way keep me safe from harm,then i can rest in peace forever.Love is sooooo fuck up!After 10 years to dating by diferent people. None of them took me serious.them r cheated on me. I always the second choice even less. They just wanna play love game wiz me.whatever i do that all wrong. […]

8/22/2014 3 comments

im sorry

by emberdark 8/21/2014

written by emberdark

It hurts I hurt others
I can not take it
My pills in hand
life has been wasted

im done

im ready

don’t stop me this time

Understand it will end like a drop of a dime

I know its selfish

I know it will hurt

But this body deserves it

For it holds little worth

8/21/2014 2 comments

is superhero real exist ? are superheroes real exist ? is superpower or magic real exist ? (like in those cool movies, games, comics, novels, books, anime / manga, etc) ? fuck this boring reality / real world / real life !!

by niki 8/21/2014

written by niki

is superhero real exist ?
are superheroes real exist ?
is superpower or magic real exist ? (like in those cool movies, games, comics, novels, books, anime / manga, etc) ?
you know, like in those ‘cool’ superhero movies : X-Men (X Men), Superman, Thor, Spiderman, Iron man, Captain America, or in those ‘cool’ fantasy / sci-fi (sci fi, science fiction) movies : Harry Potter, Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Avatar, TRON, or games like Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, etc etc ..

otherwise, fuck this boring reality / real world / real life !!

I hate reality, I hate life , I hate this very *LIMITED* & […]

8/21/2014 5 comments

The Rope

by KissOfDeath 8/21/2014

written by KissOfDeath

I don’t understand what you’re expecting of me,

your needs a bottomless pit.

Just because you don’t understand these feelings,

doesn’t make me a misfit.

I don’t wish you to understand,

this mind, it’s my own personal hell.

I’m scribbling down my note written in my own twisted fate,

hoping no one remembers to tell.

The rope, hung ever so delicately,

my last and final hope.

The knocking on my door loudens,

as my body begins to mope.

8/21/2014 5 comments

Newer Posts

Older Posts