Rants

1

Dizzying effects

  June 8th, 2018 by mo992

So far I’ve been chasing myself and trying to keep distracted. I’m failing.

My health is failing. I feel nauseous and wonky. I act as though everything is fine and my life is faultless.

My heart is racing in my chest. My arms are weak and my eyes burn to the back of my skull. I am restless and yet empty.

I’m failing. I just can’t see myself carrying on like this.

I’m so tired of being tired. I would like death to come and embrace me now but I am in too much pain to go and seek it.

Damn chronic illness. Why me? I would not wish this …

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11

The noise won’t leave

  June 8th, 2018 by sansfranzdeput

I have Tourette’s Syndrome; OCD; light Autism; chronic and crippling depression, anxiety, and various medical differences/flaws/disorders. My Tourette’s- or tics, as they are often called-. manifest themselves mostly in my mind. With the exception of a few verbal tics, and a plethora of motor/physical tics, I can hide the urges and pain which plagues and afflicts me at my every waking moment. My wife and the rest of my immediate family are all well aware of my suffering; they, unfortunately, however, realize or wish to realize the full extent to which I am truly in pain. The only spans of consciousness wherein I draw pleasure …

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1

  June 3rd, 2018 by Ree1222

I don’t like the feeling that I’ve lost. I’m overweight and it’s not easy finding a method for me. Not interested in a failed attempt and excuse me if all I talk about is wanting death because I never thought I’d turn out like this. I look at my few immediate family members, with a small hole in my heart by not wanting to be here. My body aches, my head aches, I have to work, no close friend’s anymore; it hurts to look my mother in the face because I know she wants the best for me, success in all but I know I …

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1

All I want

  June 3rd, 2018 by Lovebug21

  1. Honestly I don’t want to die. I just want this pain that I feel bury me, to go away .I want to truly be happy .That’s all I want .Juat to be happy, and the people around me to be happy. I only want true happiness. Do I have to die to achive that?
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1

im high

  June 2nd, 2018 by Unsheard

simple as that

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3

What can I do?

  June 1st, 2018 by just.idk

For the last year or so I have trying to get help. I told my doctor how I was feeling and she recommended therapy and my mother refused. I trashed my room and in her anger she took me to the hospital trying to scare me by saying they are going to lock me up or drug me up. She called me a spoiled brat and attention seeker while taking me there. I got a therapist but had to drop her because she was racailly insensitive. But I ask for help and no matter what I say it ends in a yelling match with me …

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9

Why do I keep going back?

  May 31st, 2018 by Justaclique

So, idk how to start this but here goes.

(Sorry it’s so long)

I keep going back to this same guy just because he’s the only person who’s ever really liked me for me. He doesn’t ever want a relationship but I always have, but when I bring it up he pushes it aside and doesn’t want to talk about it because he always has an excuse. I know what some people are gonna say, that it’s a toxic relationship or that he doesn’t give a shit and ik all of that but, I can’t get him out of my head. He’s the only thing stopping me …

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11

Petty

  May 30th, 2018 by Anonymous

I am petty.

My problems are petty. I should be okay. I shouldn’t want to die. I have a loving family. I have people who care about me. I have love and support, but I still wish I was dead.

I have friends who have actual problems, and they’re okay. There are people in the world who have it worse than I could imagine, but they manage. There are people on this website who have actual, significant problems. Yet, I still want to die, even though my problems are stupid and insignificant.

I don’t understand why I feel this way, or why I can’t be okay. I don’t …

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3

I wanna give up

I wanna give up

  May 29th, 2018 by unicornkitty20

I just want to give up.. I tried killing myself a couple weeks ago but my bf took me to the hospital and they saved me. I just want it all to end! I’m so done with this place !! The only thing keeping me here today is my 2 precious kittens. I don’t know what to do..

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9

Lost

  May 27th, 2018 by CGI

Stopped talking to people around me , I constantly seek to them to help me but they don’t understand the way I feel . I will not burden them any further . It’s hard to watch others concern over something they can’t control . They will understand . I feel like they’re just waiting for the day . So am I . I don’t have the courage . Every day gets harder and harder to live through . Problems arise faster than others can be solved . I don’t trust anyone and I can’t rely on myself .. I am stuck in a puzzle that …

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2

Love

  May 25th, 2018 by alienCY

I think that living is loving. And true love isn’t just a couple or something. True love is sacrifice. If you try to take love from others to fill your gap then you end up emptier and the others are missing the love you took. If you give love to others though, even if you don’t have love, if you give a piece of you away; you will find yourself more full than before. Loving is giving what you are missing. Love is really beyond logic, it doesn’t make sense, just like life. However, at the end, love is the only thing that remains and …

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2

Life

  May 24th, 2018 by alienCY

What if Life has no meaning without being meaningless?
What if Life is the meaning?
What if we are meant to be alive?
It may sound obvious but are we really alive?
And if we are not, isn’t it time to become?

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2

  May 24th, 2018 by marsmission

I am failing college because I am pathetic. Had to do a machining class and get some training from the head of the shop. I went at the later portion of the week to the machine shop to start on my parts but he said we dont have enough people to help. You need some friends because nobody can work alone and you are supposed to be here in a group, you got bad work attitude yada yada yada. He was right so I just went home. Haven’t gone to that class since. I wanted to cut myself after that but like a little ***** …

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2

Much more than sadness.

  May 22nd, 2018 by strawberrycrown

I have so many problems and things wrong with me it’s hard to keep track. I know that this site is for things to do with depression, anxiety, suicide or similar things, but this one is more about other things I struggle with and could maybe find others who can talk to me about it.

So basically it all started that I was born 6 weeks early, a tiny underweight baby who “died” and got resuscitated or whatever 3 times. I mean, bad start right? Well, since then I was sick in hospital for a few months and then still sick after that, just in my …

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3

Death

  May 16th, 2018 by Unsheard

ima kill myself and i just thought that maybe somebody should know, so now you all know.

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2

Grades and stuff

  May 15th, 2018 by NumbExhaustion

Ugh. I feel like I’m falling behind everyone. Like, I used to be top of my class and now I have a D in WHAP. (AP World History). I can’t answer anything correctly and like, every time I think I know the answer and pick it I end up missing the question no matter how much I study. The AP test is Thursday and I am so so so not ready for it. I’m studying like crazy and I still think it’s not enough.

Like, I’m not even supposed to be here yet I am and then I can’t see myself next year and I can’t …

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4

history

  May 15th, 2018 by iamdarling

each and everyday is a part of my history, a history that will be with me forever. unfortunately, i know that forever, i am going to look back on these years of my life and all i’m going to see will be an ugly kid with mental illnesses and no friends, just, wasting her life away. i want my history, i want my past, present, and future, to be happy, i want to do something worthwhile rather than just doing this wasting. uhm, yeah… this is not really what i imagined my life would be like.

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7

I’m not supposed to be happy.

  May 15th, 2018 by strawberrycrown

You know what, I seriously don’t think I’m supposed to be happy. Like I think my destiny and fate is just to be unhappy. I wish it wasn’t this way, but it is. Every time that I feel happy and can say to myself “life is going pretty great” (which is not often as it is) my life just suddenly says “oh, she’s happy, better change that”. Like literally things are finally going good like I can actually say I have friends and I’m happy with them and the way things are going but then now they’ve decided that they don’t like me as much …

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4

Crying

  May 14th, 2018 by NumbExhaustion

Ok, so this is really weird but, like, I really miss being able to cry. Like I started meds about 7 months ago and since then, I’ve been unable to have a really good cry regularly. It feels like I’m on the edge of a breakdown and I really hate this feeling. Like, I kinda want to go back to last year when I was crying almost every day because at least then I had some way of releasing whatever I was feeling. Like, now my only way of releasing my emotions when I can’t draw or write is through self harm but even that …

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2

I came the closest today that I have in a while

  May 14th, 2018 by 20_is_too_many

This last semester, I have worked incredibly hard to maintain a decent grade average, and I mean low As and high Bs….only for everything to come crashing down to a C at best because I had another fucking breakdown due to being overworked and dehydrated….literally collapsed and had to go to Urgent Care to be forced to rest, but it doesn’t matter to my school.

If my grades come back the way I expect them to, I’m going to lose my scholarship, and that’ll be it.

I cannot go back home. I’m tired of getting hit and yelled at and told that I’m worthless. If I lose …

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