Hi Guys,

It’s 8:30 here and I am already exhausted… I haven’t been getting much sleep these past few nights… Maybe 4-5 hours at the most? Maybe less? All I know is I have been going to bed around 1-2 am and waking up at 5-6:30 am… So not much sleep there… But ya know I don’t really care… Well I guess I do because I feel lonely those 3-4 extra hours and I don’t know what to do with myself…. I start overthinking things. I start wondering, questioning, questioning my very own existence. Why am I here for? What am I here for? What is […]

It’s funny how the people that were so called their for u but at the end your by your self ur probably so hurt that u don’t even know wat to do either to kill yourself or overcome your self and I find it really hurtful wen u know u been thur so much yet no body could see that they just think u thank happy girl or boy but once u let one person in and u tell them ur reall life and they go n tell people ur stuff and then seconds ur called a slut or fag or nothing but no body […]

I wanted to come here for a repost, as if once was not enough.

I’m a middle aged woman (55) whose life was wrecked by a cancer diagnosis followed by a divorce. Combo hit hard. Back then, I was tearful and melodramatic, and wrote a tearful and melodramatic post. Happily, that’s over. That is a distinct plus.

Another plus: I’ve lost my faith. I no longer believe in a life after death, and that’s a very freeing thing.

I have, I believe, been a good mother to my kids who are pretty happy, pretty well adjusted, and pretty clueless. This is a major plus 🙂

Meanwhile, I’m as suicidal […]

If I go there will be trouble!

If I stay there will be double!

SO YOU GOT TO LET ME KNOW!

SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO?

Just like everyone else on SP I have problems!! 🙁 but I try to help others, sometimes I’m negative sometimes I’m positive, but I’m so tired it’s hard to try to help others when I constantly want to die myself!

1) I’m not drowning in debt.

2) I have a job; I don’t mooch off others.

3) I have personal freedom due to the fact that I’m single.

4) I graduated from college. I plan on pursuing graduate school in the future.

5) I’m intelligent.

6) I’m experienced when it comes to the negative things in life, i.e., I’m not superficial. I don’t have to rely upon trivial advice and/or criticism from less experienced individuals.

7) I’m a gentleman with respect to the opposite sex, even if it never pays off. In other words, I’m not a loser douchebag.

8) Difficult books.

9) The ability to write.

10) Coffee without sugar.

share your suicide story with others
Reminder — don’t post hateful things here.
Do not post for suicide partners or discuss specific suicide methods
either. They will be removed.
 
This is what I read upon arrival. Is this a joke? Don’t post hateful things? THATS WHAT SUICIDAL PEOPLE DO! It’s MY life and I hate it and everything it stands for and everything it might stand for because others always think they have the right to tell me what to do then they turn and hightail it through their brainwashed cerebral psyche feeling proud that they stuck their nose into my business then run me up the […]

Last year I was hospitalized (self-admitted) because of severe suicidal ideation.  I spent a week in an emergency mental health ward and then was released and stayed in a recovery facility.

I’ve been to therapy and still see my therapist.  I have a psychiatrist and still take my Wellbutrin.  I’ve had ups and downs, but since I was discharged I haven’t had any more suicidal thoughts…until now.

I’ve worked at CBT, I journal regularly, I don’t isolate, I have a support system.  My wife is wonderful, and we have a strong relationship.  I’m close to my two college age daughters.  I remember how much pain I caused […]

The thing is, I’ve been battling for 3 years now. I let it lie for years before, but now I fight.

I didn’t want to fight, because fighting means risking defeat. If I fight, I might lose. I’m losing.

In the last year, I was hospitalized 5 times and spent a total of 6 months in the hospital. I’ve had two suicide attempts and during the first one, spent 2 days in a coma, only to wake up to delirium and yet another hospitalization.

I have scars on my legs, arms, stomach. I’ve needed countless stitches.

I’ve tried so many medications, I can’t list them all.

I am […]

You. Yes, YOU! You need to blow off steam like an overworked, piston pounding engine about to explode. Do not bottle up your emotions, or they will shatter the container as if it was flung against the wall. You must air out your dirty laundry or it will make the house smell like the inner layer of an angry sumos diaper. Venting. It is a healthy necessary, natural process that everyone should exercise to prevent pent up anger, ulcers, tumors, stress, and a faithul re-enactment of call of duty in the park/office/or school. …Or is the idea of venting just a load of hot air?

It […]

I’m not suicidal, just incredibly bored with life. I think that I’ve played too many video games, watched too many movies, cartoons throughout my life that I expect grand things out of reality. But as we all know, things are pretty mundane on planet Earth(save for wars and terrorist attacks; those are always good for a laugh).

Things are pretty sucky in my life right now. I’m living with an ex-girlfriend that my ego is still very much attached too. She’s an annoying **** but I enjoyed the sex, and like I said, she really knew how to stroke my ego and make me feel […]

Im living this life that isnt even mine. I dont know what im living for anymore..I was once a happy little girl but everything chance for me im not the same person anymore….how do I get my life back?

YOU ask me what i need and WHAT I NEED IS YOU.

I know I cant have you, You tell me i cant have you, you’ve made up your mind. You tell me you love me, you tell me you will still be around but you tell me you’re leaving overseas.. HOW THE FUCK?
You tell me all these things but do you really mean it? Why would you challenge yourself trying to make it overseas when you have a challenge here trying to make this work, make us work and (what i was hoping) start a family. YOU and only you would throw this all […]

its funny how as an adolescent i had many different reasons i wanted to die and they made sense to me.Now im not really sure if dying is the goal as of late.Acually im not sure what the goal is.
I find myself getting depressed over little things such as my aunt wasting away and me not speaking with her.also things like transpportation issues.Money issues despite never having had to pay a bill my whole life.I worry about not having a significant other.i worry about being alone homeless and helpless.Suprisinginly i worry about my own health since ive tried to take my own life so […]

You see that girl? She looks so happy, right? Telling jokes, smiling, having a great time and… Dying inside. She’s hurt, And tired. Tired of the drama, tired of not being good enough, tired of life. But she doesn’t want to look dramatic, weak and attention seeking. So she keeps it all inside. Acts like everything’s perfect but cries at night. So everyone thinks that she’s a happiest person they know. That she has no problems and her life is perfect. If only they knew the trust…  :’(

I can’t do this anymore, I really can’t…

I wish I could […]