I can’t answer that question clearly. Counselors have asked but I never had a reasonable or “good” response. It’s hard to explain to most people that you’ve never been loved or cared for. It’s hard for most people to fathom not being able to trust a living soul. Some assume that I am mentally ill and have some kind of schizophrenia because I am unable to connect with others. No, I am not mentally ill in the sense that I have some kind of problem dealing with reality. If I am considered mentally ill it would be because I have been put through the wringer […]

I have been coming here since October and have have met a wonderful individual who helped me not commit suicide back then.  She is a great person and I hope that she one day will find the person she desires to help her live a wonderful and happy life with..   I wanted to thank her and won’t name her by name to protect her, but you know who you are!

My story is simple and I am going to share for reasons that I don’t even understand.  So to get the history out of the way when I was younger, lets say 16 years old.  I […]

Why is it so hard to find a therapist who will discuss issues surrounding suicide. Can anyone suggest someone in the Greater Boston area. My first concern is that at first mention of the “S” word, they would want to have me involuntarily committed. That would be a disaster. I am in my 60’s, had too many decades of depression, and now look to more years of aging in poverty. I would like to commit suicide, and have plans, BUT, …and this is why I want a therapist to help…. I don’t want to go out feeling like a loser in a state of depression […]

Yes. The question is who is the criminal?

World killed him or He ditched people who know him?

1. If I concluded human life is a shit, isn’t it because of others ( Accused should be people)

2. Why should other human beings suffer because of your death? ( Accused is me)

IMO, First one is more logical

I don’t know, so much shit has gone on and I just think ‘what’s the point in me?’ I have 4 kids, I haven’t seen my oldest in 6 years and my youngest is living with my ex’s parents who are mad wealthy. It sucks, I have nothing to offer them.  My ex just ruined me and I had to give my kids up because I developed an eating disorder and I was so depressed I just stopped functioning.

I attempted suicide back in 2012 and lived, sad thing was, I lost 3 days of my life and nobody at all even bothered calling the hospital […]

Hey everyone! I’m 16 years old, and have struggled with clinical depression, anxiety, and self harm for quite a while. I turned to drugs and started heavily using in order to cover up the pain in my life. I was stuck in an abusive relationship that I kept trying to make work, but never succeeded. My life got so bad, that every day and every night would be spent crying and self harming. It relieved that pain for just a little while, but of course it didn’t last for long. A little over a month ago, I couldn’t take the pain of my life anymore […]

Because so many have been longing for an answer. The answer is actually very simple, to preserve our species and nothing more. Period.

We ourselves have, over all those years, raised the bar to high. We have to many expectations..! Happiness as well as sadness are just distractions from the true face of life. And when you can’t reproduce you’re evolutionary subordinate and inferior.

reading some of the things written here.. i cant even begin to imagine what it feels like to be those who are really really down..

im up and down.. honestly i still have many things in my life that give me reasons to live but so many things frustrate me still.. and those things coupled by fucking automatic negative thinking.. suicidal mindset.. makes it worse..

you know but i think i’m turning a new leaf.. (finally) i feel like i’m growing up.. because i know i can make my grass greener.. and truly believe all y’all on this website can too..

there’s always something out there.. that gives […]

When I was 3 my father commited suicide. I was told this on my 14th birthday the age I am currently at now. When I heard the news it changed my view of him. How can I forgive a man who basically abandoned me. How can forgive a man who never even loved me. I mean seriously if he truly loved me he would have stayed with me and my mom and my brother. It funny how people are soo “blessed” to have a father. But, am I even blessed to not have one. I feel as if I’m in darkness and stuck there and […]

and a million dollars.

your days starts at 6pm one day and ends 6pm the next.

how are you spending your last day?

hello friends, i m 23 . my teenage life was completely diasaster. I have a great social anxiety. social anxiety may be a disease in developed countries but where I am, it is seen as a fault . Each day is like a battle .fr me. my parents expect a lot from me as i m the eldest. i m pursng pg and ruined every thing . i wanna go home but can’t leave all at a sudden . now don’t have courage to show my face. I have been living on less food and more stress for last 5-6 years with poor […]

Hi. About two years ago, I came on here looking for help. Last year was great, I got into sports, became athletic, and almost got a girl. Of course, I’m not good enough to actually deserve someone’s love, but that’s already been accepted by me. Actually, that’s the problem now. I love a girl so, SO much, but it’s simply not going to happen. Last year, apparently she fell in love with me, but I didn’t notice like the piece of shit that I am. this year, I have fell in love with her and it’s the strongest feeling i’ve ever had…but she doesn’t love […]

I dont know how to feel or think. i am scared to think about what i am thinking about. i feel like my life is on the edge and nobody is there to pick me up before i fall over and never have to worry about feeling this fucking pain that is dragging me down so far that i can not get up. i have nothing to even live for i just want to give the fuck up my family shuns me cause of my reputation i am the black sheep of the family. i get degraded all the time because i am not good […]

I always envied and despised stupid people around me. Why do they get to be happy? Why was I always told being smart is a good thing?? It’s not a good thing. Being smart is a curse. The smarter you are the more socially awkward you are. Especially being a smart kid. Stupid kids become stupid adults and they are the ones that get to enjoy the meaningless pleasantries of life. Being smart sucks. The dumbest stupidest assholes have the most friends and screw like damn bunnies. Why can’t I have 500 friends and screw 24/7…. It’s a curse. being smarter than 9/10 people is […]

I need help going through with it, I don’t want to go on anymore this is 100% my decision, please don’t say ‘don’t go through with it’ or ‘think of your family’ that’s not fair, also this is basically inevitable I’ve postponed this so many times and realized it’s not going away so how can I convince myself to do it? Also me not being able to go through with it has nothing to do with not wanting to do it, it’s just instincts.

It’s 0130 when I am writing this, so the first thing that I wanted to share with you is that I have huge problems with sleep, because I worry so much. About every single thing.

i can’t feel happiness in life anymore, the only exception is when I am with my boyfriend. But we are in a long term relationship, so I can’t even see him very often. He is the only person I really trust and feel safe with. He is also the reason why i am still alive – because I would not want him to be sad when I die.

But recently I started […]

Welcome again tonight!

in every silence moment of desire.

I don t wan to cooparate with you anymore.

Cause ı simply realize that you are nothing but,

I am…

I am perfect than your thought.

Dear Pain, go and fuck yourself . Please.

It’s just getting harder and harder to pretend that I’m happy.  I don’t want people to act differently around me if they know I secretly wish I were dead….and I don’t feel happiness much anymore.  I have terrible social anxiety and it makes me want to disappear from everyone.

Before, when I was in school or worked in the public it was easier to pretend I was happy.  Now things are different and I can’t hide it from the people I’m close to anymore.  If they know, I’ll lose them.  They’ll be different around me, it’s happened before.

I am broke, my parents are broke. I stutter quite badly, thus no one wants to give me a job. I have social anxiety which makes me extremely awkward at times (another reason why I can’t get a job). Since I graduated I only have one real life friend. All the friends I had in college live miles away. I am ugly – almost impossible to get a girlfriend when you’re ugly and you stutter……..

I’m trying to fix things but what’s the point anyway? To work somewhere for most your life and buy things and watch movies/tv shows. Perhaps go somewhere nice for two weeks […]

Life seems so pointless.You’re born, you go to school, get a job then get old and die.Why does life have to be so meaningless and short-lived.If life is so short what’s the point of even living if it’s only to enjoy the little time you have.Sure I may just be 14 but time goes by fast and soon I’ll be out of high school and trying to get a job.I just don’t see the point anymore.Even if I didn’t kill myself I would die regardless 🙁