I’m just trying to understand life. i don’t know who I am. Why I’m here…? If I’m going to be forgotten in the end, then why even try? Life has been rough, you know finding out who you are. But I think the worst part is knowing who you are, and not liking it… At all. I’ve made plenty of mistakes that I choose not to mention. I’m not proud of who I am, not am I sure who I am, but whoever I am, I am not worthy of being around. I’m so…wrong in so many ways. And I can’t change that. And nobody […]
I feel like society has screwed me over. I feel like my parents have screwed me over. I feel like the medical establishment has screwed me over. I feel like my government has screwed me over. And no one seems to care. I feel like killing myself in a very public and theatrical way to get my point across. Everyone around me seems like a brain dead zombie. What methods are available to me to complete the act? Basically right now my best option is hanging. And I feel that is a totally degrading and horrible way to die. Shooting myself in the head seems […]
This helped me, just take the time to watch it.
I gave my friend a notebook of my suicidal thoughts that I write in when I have them (which is every day now) and for the rest of that day, he cared… now its back to the way it was before… Me being ignored and everyone else having fun without me. I self-harmed today at lunch for the first time since the beginning of October… when I went to my next class all I could think about was how I’d rather be in that bathroom self-harming… I’ve tried talking and interacting with my friends but they somehow always manage to make me feel like an […]
Am I lost, or am I just in new territory. Today I sit here.. confused I guess. Wondering if I really am back together.. or what? I started ‘feeling better’ in April.. is it coincidence that I started feeling better when I started dating someone new? Or have i just become a dependant? I dont know.. I try not to think about it..but damn its hard. Maybe its my hormones….Im a transsexual, and transitioned at the age of 19, im 34 now.. I ran out of hormones a few weeks ago due to a shipping screw up. That really sucked. Maybe its my shitty fucking […]
Lately I’ve been having hardships in school, low grades, bad teachers, lack of enthusiasim, etc. I feel like I’m starting to accept the death of my mother, who I was taken from at the age of three and died and the age of six, but everytime I feel the wound has been healed, another scab has been picked open. My boyfriend started working 1630-0000, which means I get only an hour to talk to him when I get home. I started setting an alarm to wake up at 0000 so I could talk to him when he gets home, but the late hours are taxing […]
hi.
I don’t know how to start this post…how to end it…I don’t even know how it can end. I could end up talking about puppies.
That was an exaggeration.
Ok um so yeah ok agh I really want to write but I don’t know how to put it into words.
Anyway, I’ve been through hell and back. It’s sickening how much I hate myself. I’ve had family problems for a while, before I developed an eating disorder, began to self harm, a bunch of shit imbetween (anxiety, OCD, etc.,) and just wanted to die. But there’s this saying that keeps me going.
Someone could have it […]
So, how should I go? I was thinking drugs. I’ve been sober for a while, but always love IV opiates. One last bang, then a little more. Pretty clean way to go. Exsanguination is pretty easy. Femoral artery is easy to hit. Get in the bathtub and everything just goes down the drain.
all three of my kids were taken from me, over the course of decades, repeatedly. Completely unrelated to each other. I followed one around the world, but I can’t fall in love with her. She’ll just leave me again. I said I’d never survive if I lost her, and maybe I didn’t. Maybe […]
Hi Dudes and Dudettes… Tonight I feel like Sh.t, to much work, to little sex, Correction, NONE in months and well I lost my passion for surf …. I guess I’m just tired of all the crap, really bad weather, no time for fun, wife that doesn’t care Sh.t about me, being overweight, bp Sky high, Not getting Hi 😀 in a long time …. But Im not dying today … Im thinking about it … In a big wave, point break style (movie) but without Keanu (He sucks) …. Anyways Cheers I’m having a beer ….
Three words that best describe me: Old (58) fat (220) ugly. Four years after suffering disabling heart disease, I just feel like it’s time to move on. This world has absolutely NOTHING in it for me. So alone, so lonely. I have enough heart meds to take an elephant down. To sleep and not wake up knowing I am old, fat and ugly….surely that would be best.
i want to die.
I’m thinking of setting a particular day for me to ingest this. This would surely kill me, right? I understand that acetaminophen overdose is a particularly painful way to go, but I’m thinking it’s the best method for me. I don’t have a gun…so.
What do you guys think? There’s no way this could not work, right? 100 grams? That would be 200 500mg pills.
I looked at an old picture of myself and I feel like I was looking at someone that was deceased….I am not the same guy as in the photo….don’t think the same, don’t look the same, don’t feel the same…..nothing is the same…. I feel like that picture could have been an obituary….do you guys ever feel like that when you look at really old pictures?
i think tonight just might be the night i leave this hell hole that people call life im sick of it it has nothing left in it
First off, hello. I’ve lurked this forum for a while but never really thought to join until now. I’ve been feeling completely drained lately, as if just living my life has taken everything from me, and it has gotten to the point where all I can think about is what a failure I am. Â My grades are starting to slip again after exerting so much effort to bring them up, my emotional state continues to deteriorate and my social anxiety has gotten so bad that, other than attending school and occasionally leaving the house to buy necessities, I’ve become a full blown shut in. I’ve […]
For an English 102 Research Project
I just finished this college for my English 102 research project, tell me what you think! The people on the right represent society, and they are saying people should be “happy, alive, and sensible.” The girl smiling on the bottom represents a mentally ill person. She is smiling to try and conform to society and make people believe she is okay, but to the left you can see what is really going on […]
The best part of my day is when I fall asleep, oh the peace of that darkness.
I am tired of the waking hours, endless days of be glad I’m alive, of being kind to others and forgiving myself. Being awake is the confrontation of my complete isolation, lack of any pleasure from the normal slavery of life – work, partners, friends. I’m awake but crushed, ground down, exhausted and abused by the rotten evil called life.
It’s not a dream, a joy, a celebration but rather the agony of a promise made and never kept, constantly betrayed.
Those lies of polities, religion, money, love, […]
Walking around and seeing all the American girlies just being happy while the Third World is suffering fills me with disgust. Oblivious to the plight of our civilization, they just keep getting in their limos, laughing at all the calamities. I sincerely hope they will get their comeuppance, their lesson. It fills me with sadness and doubt. No more of this. They are so nice, and yet so artificial. So shallow. For that sheer fact, I do know it is the right thing to do to depart from this wretched civilization. As a form of individual protest. I wish you all well.
I can’t do this anymore…
Please… whatever I may do… whichever path I might take… Please… have mercy on my soul…
I feel like ranting. I’ve been a user of this site for quite a while–at least a year or two, yet I rarely post or comment. This is a good place to get something off of your chest and to relate and help others out. I’m no different from anyone here. Here’s my story.
Just like a lot of people on this site, I’ve dealt with emotional abuse. It was mainly from my peers growing up. I grew up in a rough neighborhood and was bullied for ‘acting white’ despite being black. I wore glasses, lame clothes and read and drew stuff all the time. I […]