I remember when I was about to graduate from high school, so happy,full of energy and ready to do everything to get to my goals and i entered university, I felt in love madly and she broke my heart but I managed the pain, it couldn’t break me and started new relationship but didn’t end up well, but I healed my wounded heart i faced with problems and kept my hopes alive but now that I compare my current problems with mentioned failures, I laugh at them. Now and after some years, I’m totally alone, with no one around me,no friends, lost my job and […]
I’ve been cutting myself more and more recently and i am becoming addicted to it. At work today all i could think about was getting home for lunch and cutting myself! So thats what i did, on my ankle, Â and it felt so much better! But it hurts like fuck now and every time i walk the wound opens up and starts to bleed again. The worst thing is i like to see the cut, i like to look at it as if it is an achievement or something! I really think i’m becoming addicted! I was convinced to through away my razors so i […]
Depressed over a romantic failure. How familiar does it sound? I was talking to her for almost a year, but she ended up falling in love with someone she knew for three months. It’s a downer. But why would she fall for someone like me? 24, living at home, can’t find a job, and really awkward. Yes, she said its cute and stuff, but cute goes only so far. And it happens again and again.
Looking into people’s eyes has always been a challenge for me. I stutter. I seem to have no control over the tone of my voice and my facial expressions. This makes […]
I woke this morning and the first thing i was thankful for was the fact that i joined this site last night and now i have a chance to try to help others get through what i did. And i am thankful for each of your lives, and the fact that some of you made it to this day. Today, try to forget all the bad things. Be thankful for what you DO have today, like this site, which is such a great support system. Have a great Thanksgiving everybody! You are loved.
I got married nearly 21 years ago to a man I thought would never do this to me. Â But now, he’s cheated on me, for a year, with someone he picked up online for casual sex. Â He says he’s never loved me, or he only loved me for two years, or he loves me but not like a wife. He tells me he’s been miserable for five years, no ten years, no fifteen years, no eighteen years. Â We “celebrated” our 20th anniversary, and he said he “even enjoyed some of the experiences” but this was before I knew about her.
I was sexually abused as […]
i was happy once, i know i was..just cuz i cant remember it doesnt mean it didnt happen. right? burn after burn nothing gets better, cut after cut. pill after pill. and im still the same.. nothing will change will it? i will never be good enough for my parents. i dont understand why i even care about their opinion. i hate them but since theyre my parents i have to love them… i wish my life was different.. i wish i was happy.. i wish i was dead.. and thats the truth.. life would be much better without me.. no one can deny it.. […]
I really don’t understand. Nothing affects me like my father. I’ve had my brother tell me he is so disappointed in me, that I am selfish and immature, that I abuse the ones I love with what I do, that all I care about is attention-seeking, that I’m going to fail in life. I’ve had my mother tell me that she simply can’t believe that I am not doing this to hurt her. That my cutting, that my suicide attempts, that even my physical illnesses like my catatonic episodes where I ended up in Hopkins Neurology because I couldn’t move my body, that all of […]
i got a girlfriend! woohooo. asked her out on tuesday. she said yes. so now me and her are together.. but shes pretty busy so we dont get to hang out much.
i told one of my friend about how i have a girlfriend and hes like “what? but you’re not a lesbian.” and that just pissed me off. yah im not a lesbian. im pansexual.
i burnt my finger last night.. got bored so i was melting plastic with my lighter and it dripped onto my finger, i hope it doesnt get infected..
got a new look, more punk now and i LOVE it. tho i do […]
I’m fed up of broken promises of ‘when you move to X, things will get better’. I moved schools three times (once in year 8, then again in year 12). It never got better. Now I’m at uni and I was lured in with that same stupid lie. It isn’t better here. If anything it’s worse. I’ve already overdosed here, unfortunately failing. I’m just fed up and lonely and at the end of a thin rope. I’m ready to snap.
For the past 10 or 12 years i have known that things in my life weren’t right. How on earth did i allow my sad pathetic life come to this? Alls i know is that i can’t take it anymore, constant thoughts of suicide even if i haven’t guts to do it i still have this strong feeling of wanting to die. I often question my very existance. I do understand what people are trying to do when they write stuff like ” It will get better” stuff like that, but at the same time it never does get any better. Just a few things […]
Sigh. I get better then when I fall it’s worse than the previous worse of before if that makes any sense at all. My life is declining at a rapid rate, and I’m losing grip on myself, I know I’m going to slip very soon. My whole life, I’ve been helping other people, basically living for other people and that’s basically made me crack until now where I’ve crumbled. People expect me to be a certain way, shape me a way I can’t be shaped, and make me something I don’t want to be. I’m suppose to be perfection in an imperfect world and boy […]
I may be suicidal now but if I were to have children one day I would suck up all that pain and depressio.. Just so I can stay alive and strong for them
“What’s the most disappointing moment of your life?”
“Waking up the next day.”
“Yeah man I know what you mean could have definitely used that extra half hour of sleep this morning.”
You don’t understandÂ
I used to think I would find love one day. Now I just think I’m unfit for it. I’ve never had a boyfriend, or a first kiss, or anything. I would even settle for a girlfriend at this point, if she cared about me. I’m not sure if I’m a lesbian. I’m so confused. Whenever I look at other women I think they are prettier and more appealing than men… but I still am attracted to the opposite sex. Does this make any sense? It doesn’t matter though, because I can’t even make friends. All my friends last for one semester of college, then I don’t see them again. I feel like […]
No one understands how i feel insde. How much every piece of bad news i recieves absolutely kills me & pushes me further into depression. At school i keep my walls up, everyone thinks of me as the girl that’s always happy.. But on the inside i’m not. I’m young, but i’ve gone through a lot in my life. No one my age could understand my struggles, i wouldn’t want to bother anyone with all my problems anyways. Sometimes, (like right now), the bad in my life out weighs the good. & this makes me feel like I should just end my life. My mom […]
I tried the butterfly project out. Guess how that ended up? I was balling my eyes out and scrubbing it all off my arms. I can’t stand the thought of the names of people I care about over these ugly scars.
I know I’m only 19 and I have a lot of growing up to do, but I feel as if there’s no future for me to look forward to. I had a very hard life growing up, I had to deal with both physical and verbal abuse at the hands of my mother. I never received hugs, kisses or I love you’s from my mother. She rather beat the shit out of me everyday call me names like stupid, heffer, ungrateful and dumbass. My bi-o dad is not in my life.i haven’t seen the man I should call daddy since I was 2. He and […]
Alone In This Cruel World That So Many People Call Home While My Thoughts Brutally Attack Themselves
I’ve attempted to write my suicide note. Or notes I should say. I’m not even done with the one to my love. It’s like 4 pages long already and not even close to being finished. Do I know if I’m going to commit suicide? No. I just want everything ready for when and if it does happen. I see it being a 30 to 70%. 30% being I won’t attempted it. The other 70% is I will. Probably not now but latter.
Tomorrow and Thanksgiving and I’m not sure what to be thankful for. My family resents me. My friends will eventually turn their backs on me. What’s […]
So this guy has my uke and It’s my sisters actually, and I’m fucked if I don’t get it back. They hate me so I feel like they might have smashed it or something, or sold it. Fuck my life. sdflkjasdlkfj.
I’m fucked.