I read about all these teenagers and people in their early 20s feeling suicidal. I remember being in that age group and feeling the same way. Hope always got me through. Now I’m 51. I’m single. Nothing to show for my life except that I’ve survived. That’s my accomplishment. I still feel like giving up. Every day. Themes such as ‘hope’ and ‘potential’ don’t mean as much once you cross into your 50s. I used to think that one day I would meet a girl and we would fall in love have a great life together with children and family trips and I would be […]
It makes me sick to my stomach what people do to animals.
If I had a say anyone who ever hurt an aminal would be dead.
I come from a pretty good family. My father is dead but it seems normal to me. I have a car, I’m in college, I will always have a place to stay and enough money to make it through school comfortably. I’ve cut myself before, it was when I was in Iraq. I wasn’t happy, it wasn’t the whole “war” bothering me, it was the people. I don’t like being a girl. I feel out of place. The Army doesn’t care. It was a hard year for me. I’m 24 and I’m staying with my mom until I finish college. She’s nice. Buys me what […]
Just when i needed people the most, they all just stepped back.. at the same time nonetheless. I can’t fix this, and it really feels like everyone just expects me to snap out of it. My kids are keeping here, but the torture and torment inside my head has become almost constant. It would be very easy to just give in to the thoughts but i can’t help but fight it and that’s what makes it worse. If i let the paranoia take over, I just wouldn’t allow anyone around me. but there’s this part of me that yearns for understanding. Someone who will try […]
So I found something of mines from about a year or two ago and I decided to put it up on here. Everyone puts up the troubles they’ve been through and I’d like to share what I’ve written back then and maybe when later on, if I make it through with life, I could look back to my posts. Anyways, this was made around 2010 or ’11. This was for my friend, who was also facing depression like me and we both promised we wouldn’t do anything horrible to each other. I felt like I failed her and that she wouldn’t ever forgive me, surprisingly […]
He’s in the process of breaking my heart. Its been over a year, and I love him more than anything but for every high there is a low.
I never hurt myself before you, and now I’m looking for ways to cover up cuts. I know, pathetic.
I was walking home along the road yesterday looking at every car that passes as an opportunity to no longer feel this way.
We’re still together, but need time apart? I feel like I’m gonna lose you to someone else, and I know that you don’t even treat me right half the time so why am I so […]
I’m a christian. I love God with all my being, but i always wonder to myself why I’m here. My life is a miserable wreck. I’m fat and ugly. I’m not “popular”. I have almost no friends. My family is way messed up. My Dad doesn’t give a crap about me and my step mom is a snobby psycho. My sister is moved in with us for reasons I have no right to explain. My sisters daughter is everything I’m not and makes me feel jealous everyday, my little brother is a major douche bag and is probably going to end up caught […]
Ive felt like killing myself for so long now. I thought I was fine for a little bit but what do ya know…. I’m back. I hate almost everything. No one answers or talks to me. My dad is all the time asking and saying hurtful things “you have any friends son?” “you gay or something?!” “when you gonna get a girl friend?” just things of the sort and it dosnt help at all. My brother used to call me adopted when I was little. I know he was kidding and just being how a lot of big brothers are. But I really wish I […]
Mom I wish I did more for you I wish there was something that i could have done to make you stop. That. Night I came home and saw you drink for the first time and instead of being scared I wish I could have made you to stop. If there was anything that I could have done I regret not doing. I feel like failed you I feel like I was not the daughter you deserved to have. I hate myself for doing what you needed to get better. I should be dead and you should still be alive. You should have that house […]
Today I went to my cousin’s open house. There was this little girl there, 6 years old, that I had never met before. She saw me giving the other kids “airplane” rides and wanted one as well. She waited in line multiple times, until I was too exasted to lift anyone else. Then she wouldn’t stop following me, so I started talking to her. You know how little kids like to tell you really unimportant things and many times nobody truly listens to? Well I like to listen. I like to ask them questions and hear all the innocent things running through their heads. So […]
no really? whats good about me. NOTHING.
Hi.
Im Taegan.
Im a selfharmer. I really need help.
I dont know why god hasnt taken me yet, I have survided 2 diabetic coma’s , 3 three overdose’s and about 6 or 7 hospital visits from cutting my wrist in just about that right spot.
I have been called just about ever name in the book. I think I speak for everyone when I say this bullying needs to stop. I dont know why I am so suicidal. I shouldnt let this get to me. We shouldnt let this get to us. Whether youre gay,Bisexual,Lesbian .. or whatever you are. We are ALL human.<3 […]
I just can’t do this anymore. I’ve been depressed every single day since we broke up. It’s been two months now, and not a day goes by that I don’t think about her and regret everything I did wrong. I’m in love with her, and there’s nothing I can do about it. She is always on my mind, and I just can’t live this way. I wish things were different, I wish we never broke up, but we did, and it was all my fault. I really don’t want to wake up tomorrow. It just hurts too much. I love her with all my heart.
I hate the fact that you make fun of and say mean shit about the one person that I really love…I hate that when my boyfriend broke up with me you showed no pity but you kick me out of the room when you want to talk to your friend who was stood up for his second date….I hate that I can’t get away, that there is no where to go, and no one to listen. And everyday that I think I want to kill myself and I talk myself out of it I find myself wishing I did kill myself the next day.
I just […]
Is it possible?
To be able to feel better simply by writing down feelings and thoughts?
Is that what I needed to do all this time?
After writing my first post I felt like shit, bringing all those memories back up again after spending so long trying to forget. But now. Now- I feel better. Lighter maybe, more resilient. Perhaps, dare I say it..  A little closer to how I used to feel.
Lets hope this thing sticks with me when I feel I need to bring up darker memories.
Fingers crossed.
And.. damnit. Reading over what I’ve just written is making me question wether what I felt way back when […]
I’m only 13 years old and I self harm myself almost everyday. It all
when I was only 2 years old matter of fact I was not even 1. My
mother got MS and she lost her legs. The older I got the worst
everything become. I never went on a field trip or went to a friend’s
house to play. I had friends but the older I got the worst of friends I
got like the druggies, whores, bullies, liars, and abusives. When I
was in 6th grade I found a boy I liked tall, rocker, handsome, and
sweet. It was a thursday morning in the hallway when some of my
friends […]
My boyfriend is threatening to leave me if I don’t do something to make it up to him by midday. Fuck I’m so stupid I can’t think of anything. I rather die.
im not gonna say that my feelings for life doesn’t change every now and then. that would be a lie. i have good days and bad days like everyone else. and this lady’s and gentlemen is a really bad day.
no its not a bad day as in: someone f**** me over or i’ve been stabbed with a knife or my boss hates me or anything like that. its just the god damn feeling of being alive. people say its a lovely feeling. i think its gross and uncomfortable. and just FYI. don’t try and say that you know how to fix this or. just give […]
32 years my body will have been alive this summer 2012. Yet I am within this body, this machine of meat and bone and I feel nothing. I’ve always been like this. Flitting between crushing boredom and suicidal depression. I have never enjoyed anything and have never felt happy. I am so tired of struggling day by day. I gave up faking the normal attitude people and society expect from us years ago. I couldn’t do it anymore. It was after this that I was finally diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome. Looking back now it all fits into place. But this is a suicide help board […]
i am having this horrible time i wanna give up but i wanna have hope though now i have none i fear being alone i cant put up with being lonely. i CANT BE ALONE??? :/