If I like my body. If it really has any real use to me. Sure, I’m attractive.. At least that’s what people tell me. I’m thin but muscular and I’ve recently bleached my hair blonde.. Every contour of my body drives the men crazy… But is that it’s only use?

Is the purpose of my body to please others? Because it certainly doesn’t seem to please me. All I see are the scars.. All I feel is the feeling that my body is giving up. I don’t feed it properly.. I don’t necessarily take care of it. I smoke cigarettes and fill it up with drugs until it requires them […]

I’ve decided to end my life tonight. It’s been coming for a long time now.

People who say everything happens for a reason are full of it.

You’d think i’d have more to say, i mean this being my last chance at it. I have nothing incite full or wise to offer you, no wisdom before i go.

Life just really sucks.
I can’t deal anymore.
I leave my two baby girls behind, i hope the worlds gentler on them then it’s been on me.

I’m sorry girls. I did everything i could. You better take good care of em michelle

I’ve only been depressed this year.  Extreme anxiety, a possible eating disorder. Everything at home is always fine, I watched the rest of my family enjoy Christmas dinner, while i was counting my calories and limiting food intake. It’s the bullying. I tried so hard to be happy, to enjoy Christmas. I LOVE Christmas. This year, I sit at the table with my head down. It’s honestly sad looking to me,  I picture myself today and all I see is this girl looking depressed, ghostly pale skin, tired.

I would’ve never thought I’d ever been depressed. I’m different. What used to be a lively outgoing young […]

Hi all,

I am absolutely desperate to obtain ********.  I’ve read the PPH, and am aware of the source mentioned therein; however, from what I’ve read in various discussion groups, this source is rather hit or miss.

Does anyone know of another source, perhaps within the U.S.?

I’ve thought of all the other methods (i.e., helium, etc.), but they’re not for me.

Thanks!

For about two weeks now I’ve experienced a loss of appetite. When I look at food, even foods I like, I have absolutely no desire to eat them. And I rarely get hungry. The thing is, I want to be able to eat. I don’t enjoy not eating. At first it was just a little annoying, nothing that even concerned me that much. I tried not to pay it any mind. That is until my mom said to me, “Your hands are so cold. Why aren’t you eating? I hope nothing is seriously wrong with you.”
That did it. She inceptioned, if you will, the […]

Then i’m gone. Then i’m gone. Then i’m gone.

That’s how i feel 99 percent of the time. I feel so alone. I hate bein alone. I hate it because I can think. And its bad when I think. Nothing good ever comes out of that, only scars and tears and bad thoughts. I feel like everyone is forgetting me. Why can’t I be normal and loved? Why did God have to put me in this place? I hate living and I wish I was dead. Nothing good ever happens so there is no point to it then. Why hurt when freedom is just on the other side? It doesn’t cost to die. And […]

I cut myself on Christmas. I didn’t think i will do it. When I realized, i was already wipping blood away and more appeared. It wasn’t deep enough to scar. It was just amazing in a scary way to see the red blood against my skin. Strangly, afterwards, I felt cold down to my bones. Like something is trying to burst out from my body and i vomited.

So much has happened today and I’m all very sick. Cold and tired. Life has somewhat become a stand-still. Nothing too bad, nothing good. It’s frightening that I’m getting used. Being alone, being useless. I sit all day at home, watching […]

I can feel the darkness fell my heart! I can’t see the warmth of Christmas after Losing you. I have felt this feeling before! My cancer is overcoming! At times I wish it would take me so my pain well stop! The one who gives me joy love. And happiness is gone. I love you Suzanne!

I called a suicide hotline…..they hung up on me. Go figure.

Sorry but I just happened to stumble upon this site….. Hullo My name’s Aj, I’m 16, a self-injurer, and have recently been dealing with suicidal thoughts so uh here it goes:

Background: Father- beat the crap outta-you kinda dad, Mother- I love her to death but she married an ass, never been to a physc….probably should, and my family believes that suicide is a cowards way out.

I haven’t dealt  with suicidal thoughts for over 2 years. By this I mean thinking about it everyday and constantly planning. For some reason the thought of me ending my […]

They say the holidays r harder then most other times… Maybe its true, but… I just feel lost all the time. I feel selfish cuz my depression is sparked from something so petty compared to others real problems. Non the less, I feel so torn up inside…
Despite wut my loved ones say, iv never done anything to make any1 proud… Getting through highschool so many years ago was the highlight of my achievements and I haven’t had the desire to progress ever since… I’m at a dead end job and will never be able […]

Hello, my name is Jessica. I’m going to tell my story like how someone writes a book, I am used to it that way.

I was born with Development Delay. From that point on, it would be guaranteed that I would be nothing but a freak, different from everyone else. I am an older girl in a younger girl’s body. Things were looking okay, besides for the fact I went to a “special” preschool. I was guaranteed I wasn’t affected mentally. Things struck me like a brick when I received my first bully, my Kindergarten teacher. Even for a development delay child, I seemed to react […]

There were a couple of people which built their own machine and ended it all. Gruesome because uasually they aren’t found for days or weeks. The head still has conscieness after being severed for a few moments maybe a minute or more. Seem like it would take some carpentry skills and some basic common sense  as to how it would actually works.

As I’m sitting here, I’ve heard at least 3 different gun fights with in blocks of where I live. It every night there are gunshots just blocks away. I think did anyone get hit, or are the drug deallers just shooting randomly.

So many people posting their story.. Thought I’d post mine.

I guess all the ‘bad stuff’ really started when I was 11. Sure my dad abused us before then, but only as a dicaplin. Pulling the hair.. Slapping the face.. Kicking your ass all the way up the stairs to your room..

When I was 11, I was molested. May 6th, 2005. About 4am from my guess. It was at my best friend’s birthday party. Her dad. Needless to say I don’t really talk to her anymore. She got too messed up for obvious reasons.

It wasn’t too bad really. I just woke up with his hand on […]

I was going through tough times, I had depression, struggling with an eating disorder, and just feeling so different. I felt like no one understood and that I was  this freak. This girl that no one understood, a girl that people laughed at, a girl that people gave dirty looks to.  I fell into a deeper depression, (which i still am in now) About a month ago, it was only cutting, which seemed harmless to me. It almost felt nice, i was numb to pain now.

I stopped for about too weeks.

Then it continued this time, only more intense, more deeper and it became a daily […]

Im 20 years old and can not take life any longer. I have a severe un-interest in life.. I grow bored and am growing to feel a hate for the human race itself. I love my family and friends but I just feel I could have coped a couple of thousands of years ago. Just not in this time, with all the needless labels humanity has created for simple personality traits… for example, if your an overly ”shy” person that likes being alone and has the ability to enjoy your own company your ”labeled” as a unsociable freak that needs medication. everything is blown out of […]

Injustice, insecurity, and very many problems.

Not a clue where they came from or how I could solve them.

Nights seeming darker, feeling more sorrow.

No anticipation for the day or the sun of tomorrow.

Concrete in my veins, a wrecking ball in my head.

Years of self hatred, wishing I was dead.

Crumbling away slowly, until there was nothing more.

I swallowed back hard, and sank to the floor.

Somehow still alive, but still without life.

Just a small spark of hope things would go right.

Days grueling on, forcing myself forward.

That glimmer of hope keeping my heart between my shoulders.

But time is only temporary: three months slowly passed.

That speck of hope the last […]

I don’t even really know what to say or how to say it or what direction I am going to go with this but I want someone anyone to hear how I am feeling so their will be no questions…I am not a weak person I am very strong mentally and physically but at some point as a human being when is enough enough? Over the past couple months I have lost my job not have any contact with my daughter and on xmas eve my girlfriend of seven years broke up with me. So in a matter of months I have lost everything I […]

How many people here are gonna do ligature asphyxiation?

I’d like to talk about it with someone

mrsebastior @ gmail . com

I’m sorry for leaving you.

I just couldn’t handle this phobia.

I ain’t placing any blame.

I just wasn’t happy.

Only when i smoked weed and/or did zopiclone, played guitar and talked to george.

When i smoked weed and/or took zopiclone, playing guitar feels kinda spiritual, like i’m connecting with the drugs, guitar and music.

But when i come down from the drugs i’m just right back to square one.

Depression. Because of my phobia. And i just sit and cry, wishing i’d die

I was actually gonna go months ago, but i stayed, for you mum, and george, who’s my best friend.

The only true friend and person i ever talked to. I’m […]