That’s how i feel 99 percent of the time. I feel so alone. I hate bein alone. I hate it because I can think. And its bad when I think. Nothing good ever comes out of that, only scars and tears and bad thoughts. I feel like everyone is forgetting me. Why can’t I be normal and loved? Why did God have to put me in this place? I hate living and I wish I was dead. Nothing good ever happens so there is no point to it then. Why hurt when freedom is just on the other side? It doesn’t cost to die. And that would get rid of all my pain. Am I selfish for wanting death so badly? Why do we have to hide the fact that we want to die?? Why can’t I choose when I want to die? I want to be able to choose my time. I’m worthless. I fail at school. I have only a few friends that I know actually care. I have one friend who hate me but acts like she cares when she’s actually fake and a liar. But I don’t hate her. I care too much and that’s why I haven’t said anything to her and I’m nice to her and normal and I would do anything for her or any of my few friends. Because I love them no matter what. I have a really big issue with my self-image. I HATE how I look. I can’t look at myself in the mirror without thinking how ugly I am. I have been called names and teased and hurt. I don’t know how to evEn start dealing with it. That’s why I want to die. Its not worth living anymore for me. I’ve taken this bullshit for wayyyy too long now. I need to escape somehow. But now I have promised my best friend I wouldn’t do it. And I’m not one to break my promises. And I will not break this one for sure.
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I’m very sorry you feel that way. I’m sure there are people that like you, you just have to look for them. They are out there. Friends and potential friends are out there. How do you think your parents and your friends would feel if you just killed yourself? Keep that promise, and hold on. I believe in you.
hey you,
Yep life can be tough, but often it’s we ourselves that make it tougher for ourselves, not others.
Afterall, we control our thoughts and our thoughts control our life pretty much. In reality it is our thoughts that control the good or bad food we eat/drink.
Sadly, life and people are and can be superficial. But that’s cool if we know that. it is what it is.
Your question is not how do i change people, but rather, how do i change myself? (FOR THE BETTER)
Running away from problems is ALWAYS the easiest solutions, why do you think most people chose this? Most are weak, FEW are strong. Be one of the Few.
“If” body image is an issue, that’s perfectly cool and perfectly normal. The real question is so how do i change my body? Start slowly, but START and keep going, by taking little steps at a time.
You actually sound pretty courageous to me for ‘saying’ all this out publicly.
if you want help and ideas or just want to chat, feel free to say hi and type ur email and we can chat more.
Stay well and keep your spirits up in the face of challenges okay? Learn to be strong not weak. You’re doing well so far.