I love art. I love art because it’s the closest you can ever get to real magic.

I hate myself because I don’t have the magic.

I’ve wanted to go for a long time, but I’m still here because I want to learn how to make the magic.

Why are you still here?

I’m laying here looking out the window..it’s been pouring all day, and the sky is so dark..you can’t see 2 feet in front of you. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat..hell, I broke my foot and a toe..I can’t even walk. So I’m just laying here staring into the gray outside. I can’t stop thinking about them..about how nothing can bring them back..it was a fiancee and daughter, if anyone reading this was wondering. She was a little over a year old, and the most adorable thing ever..she’d play this peek a boo game with a blanket. I think I made a post about it […]

I’ve been trying to be okay with life but it seems to be getting hard every day. I keep having dreams about being raped and almost killed. Then I also have dreams about killing myself and no one ever finding out what happened to me. Will these dreams ever stop? My dad is an asshole and gets mad about everything and at my job I get screamed at for things I didn’t do that others did. I try and be happy but everywhere I turn people try and ruin everything I’m trying to change for myself. I want to be happy and be able to […]

moral of the story.. at least i’m high as fuck.. (uppers)

What are your expectations of it?

Hi, I was wondering if anyone knows the logistics of how to grab an officer’s gun out of their holster (this is WAY harder than it sounds–holsters are made carefully to fight against this).  If I can pull it off though, I wonder if I could put it to my head and pull the trigger in a way that would spatter brain matter all over the judge, my retard attorney, and the ****** prosecutor together.  With any luck I could ruin all of their lives forever (and make the news, dramatically!) while simultaneously taking myself out of this godforesaken meaningless world.  I would need to […]

Okay so i’m thinking of maybe doing partial hanging

so i have 2 sweatpants ropes or whatever tied together, i have a few of these type of ropes, 4 actually, should i spin some of them together to make it stronger?

but idk, it might fuck it up so it doesn’t tighten as well

Okay so i got out of the depression for a while, found my way back into music.

But now i’m depressed again and i’ll prolly give up music again, i’m looking for a new method to end it all with, my friend, won’t say his name, tried my method and it didn’t work, and i don’t even know if i’m doing it right, i think i used to get it right, but yeah, gonna look around for some methods now.

If i can’t find anything i’ll prolly go back to my old method, ligature asphyxiation

Ive done it again. I know I should not self-harm but I just love the feeling. I’m addicted to the pain. Not a good thing. I like the pain that go thrugh my body when I self-harm. I dont know how to stop. Any tips? I do it cause I’m addicted to the pain and it helps when I’m sad.

I feel so crap today. Don’t really know why I feel so bad, but I do, I guess life is just like that. Sometimes things are OK, and sometimes they are really bad, and at all times, it is pointless, it is worthless. Last night I cut again, and it only just reminds me of how much I want it to all go away, to all end. Driving around reckless – hoping that this next bend, there’s a wall, a hole, something hiding away waiting for me to come around and meet it. Such a shitty day. A shitty feeling.

My computer is dying fast and i just wanted to let you all know I’m most likely ending it soon. It really is sad to see so many new people on here… but Kno1, TC, KnightofDoom, Leaky.. and many others. You’ve been great to me, and I appreciate that…

So… if this is it… my method is hanging/asphyxiation… I’m a 16 year old male from Canada (won’t say what province just in case), not saying my name.

Anyway thanks and goodbye.

Right now I wish I could die… but honestly I’m stuck

My family has had mentally abusive cycle, and my mother lashes out out on most things i do/say

My real dad I never met him, for I wish I never do either, hes abusive, he never wanted me and he did terrible things to my mother ex. he ran her over with a car.

My step dad can be nice at times but most the time hes strict and doesnt care.

I have one friend whom only cares about boys, and me driving her to see them.

A new boyfriend whos another color, and my mom doesn’t agree with […]

Hi, I’m Mary.

I see things that aren’t there, I hear things when no one is there, I feel people eyes staring at me from across the room. And I’m scared. I don’t want my medication, no, I don’t like it, it makes me feel insane. But am I insane? Who knows, but only me. I have a list on mental diseases, i hate it.

Schizophreniform
Bipolar Disorder
Insomnia
Paranoia
Personality Disorder
Severely Depressed

Am I insane?

Maybe.
You would never guess my age, well, I’m only 17. With all this hell. My family was torn apart by death. It all started with my uncle Mike, cause of death; Suicide. Then […]

i feel so alone .

An everlasting friend, 

A feeling if joy that won’t end.
A stop to these constant blows, 

The end of the voice who comes and goes.

Being able to enjoy each breath of air, 

Able to live life with barely a care. 

I’d wished to be able to stay with you, 

But my wishes, they just don’t come true.

To steal someones pills to overdose? You’ll probably laugh and say yes. Just want opinions.

I Applied For College I Mean i wanna Make Something Of My Life And I ddidnt Get Accepcted So idk Wat To Do.. I Feel Like My world Is jus over now.. im so hurt… i have been crying for hours.. i turned my fhone off i jus dont want to talk to anybody at all. im sorry but it hurts so bad..

The ears,quite sensitive to the sound
Sometimes the silence, screams out loud
The eyes lie, when visions are so clear
You read between the lines
when there’s no words to be found
Stories appear.
Dont smell the most familiar scent,
even when it leaks from your wounds,
And leaves your clothes drenched.
Leaves, left. Never coming back
The last taste on your tongue,
Those lips that left you out of breath
Love,kiss of death.

headache after headache after headache. Is it the light from my computer? Or from the tv om the screen. The scent of soap the lingers in my basement. Is it making it worst? I am not me today. I am a complete stranger in someone else’s body. Who am i? I dont know. I really dont know who i am. But all i know… i want rope around my neck dangling from a tree.