Painful Tears
Hurtful Thoughts
Dying Nights
Killer Victims
Walking Freaks
across the street.
Loud Preachers
screaming in my ears.
Supporting Friends
who dont understand.
It seems like
im being punish
Praying to God
whom i ask for frogiveness.
What words…
will stab me
till i have interal bleeding.
When will the darkness
surround my every being.
Will i have my eyes open
to see another day
Or my eyes close
to see the internal night
forever…
Hii guys! Remember me?
Just want to make an update consider I haven’t been on here for a while…
I’m doing really well!
Remember the guy I used to speak about, the one I “loved”
Well he’s out the equation we had a massive ruck and he told me nothing would happen
So I was upset about this alot but I come to the conclusion I could do so much better
So I deleted him out of my life.
& This was a about a month and half ago now
I’ve realised, I never loved him.
Soo, He fucked off.
I found a guy closer […]
I cannot wait to die I just wanna drop dead or hang myself thats perfect I will hang myself don’t tell me it won’t work I will make it work I will freaking make it work maybe not today nor tomorrow but soon enough I will do it I will and don’t tell me otherwise because I fucking hate my life I hate myself I’m so alone and Im just gonna commit suicide soon because I am far beyond repair or any kind of help so dont freaking tell me I need to see a freaking doctor because they dont care no one does anymore
When I’m “happy”I’m still sad it comforts me the only thing I will have in the end is nothing my summer is near it’s end and so is my life I don’t want to wake up everyday at 6:00 to get ready for a place I get an education?the most I’ve learned is how much I hate people and how cruel they.I feel like a slave to life.nothing good ever lasts to long
how the hell am i supposed to get ahead and try to get out of this fucking depression if NO ONE WILL FUCKING HELP ME!!!!
If I died, nobody would care. They would just ignore it and carry on with their lives like my death hadnt even phased them. They would just keep living their happy, joyus lives and mabye they would be even happier because im gone. Nobody would think about me if i died. Much like nobody thinks about me now. EVERB0DY HATES ME. I would be doing them and myself a favor by ending my life.
-End
I was very happily married to my husband for 2 1/2 years. We were in love, really happy, really getting along well. he’s a filmmaker, and took a project on the other side of the world. He’s done this from time to time. This time, 5 months after leaving, he comes back not knowing if he loves me. Not knowing if he wants to be with me. he wants to move or at least try to go back to the place he was in to try to film commercials. That would drain our savings. He’s really depressed. He can’t find work in the area we live. […]
I’m still addicted to everything. All The self harm…its so hard to quit but I’m working on it. I went from atleast 5 times a day to 3 I’m almost down to 1 now. I’m getting better. I’m eating more and even though sleep still escapes me I have a reason to be awake,now more than ever. I hope you know that those of you who commented on my posts do help alot. Thankyou
You can sit there and yell at a 17-year-old girl as she’s crying her eyes out and “joking” about how much she wants to commit suicide… But, you won’t borrow 20$ from her best friend so you can stop being in pain…. ? There’s something wrong there.
You make me cry atleast 1-6 times a week, sometimes 1-5 times a day.. The only reason why I stay with you is because I love you. But. I love you so much I hate you. -_- so…fuck. You constantly call me a ***** while your last ex cheated on you while you were homeless, yelled at you, and […]
okay so i’m gonna go as soon as i get the chance. probably today. hopefully today. it’s gonna be hard leaving my best friend. i was gonna do it jul 2nd but i pussied out ’cause i was too damn high and when i got to the place i got a little creeped out. and he knows how much i think about this but still. i’ma hate myself for leaving him, he’s been there for me since day 1, unlike any other person i’ve ever known.
i’ve been practicing my method, ligature asphyxiation, and i have a question.
do you feel a pulse in your head when […]
I often feel like I’m the only one that understands me or cares about me. It’s such an ugly feeling to feel like you are the only person you can rely on. Haha and it’s funny as hell when you are not even that dependable in the first place. I feel like shit constantly. Like a burden, a mess, a tragedy. I hate being so useless and helpless and pathetic. I hate when people who barely know me judge me.
My mother died in May and it’s been really hard for me cause I think of her a lot and I end up crying a lot. I miss […]
I don’t get why people pick on people about things they can’t help? Do they just live to make people hate themselves?
Yes, I have crooked teeth. But don’t you think I would do something about that if I could?
Yes, I may be ugly. But how do you expect me to change that?
Most of the things you tease me about can’t be helped! So why do I let you bring me down? It’s not doing me any good..
Of all the people on my dad’s side of the family I missed talking to the the most, it was my older cousin Carson.
Carson and I used to be close as kids, when my father was part of my life. We are only two years apart and to him and I it’s always felt like nothing. He’s the closest thing I ever had to a brother, more so then my own brother even. That’s why when he decided to come down to my father’s house I didn’t think much about it, all I could wonder about was what he was going to be like now […]
Now… there isnt really anything to say anymore.No words nor emotion.Suicide… you haunt me like an ghost. Moaning and fearing me.I guess these days… there isnt really anything to talk about anymore.
I often feel alone, and cold. I always have an idea to kill myself at hand. My life just isn’t worth living to me, It’s worth living to other people. To my girlfriend, and her grandma. They’re my family in my eyes, I love them. If something were to happen to them, I would have nothing to live for. I’m in grade 9 I feel like a useless piece of Sh*t dropout and it’s all I’ll ever be. I want to go back to school next year, but it’s just so hard. I can’t stop thinking about her, about Haley. When she was here I was […]
I DON’T KNOW WHY I EVEN TRY ASKING FOR HELP ANYMORE, NO ONE EVER ANSWERS WHEN I CALL, CLEARLY NO ONE CARES.
why should i?
Empty. Cold. Hollow. Alone.
I walk past cracked walls
That bleed crystal tears.
Vines that twist with thorns,
Shaped by the icy winds promise,
A false comfort of numbness.
Dust and dead leaves dance in silence
Ahead as my blood pumps a rhythm hard and fast.
Silent screams echoing, reverberating past,
And a cold sweat pours down my neck.
Rusty metal arms, silhouettes, seek – surround me
I run with fervor from shadowy cages of memories past.
Footfalls echo the frenzied beating of my heart.
Walls release cruel laughter and old screams.
I crash.
The Earth shatters into glass,
Walls crumble into sand,
Spiraling into a vortex of shard and […]
I survived another day,
Empty and alone.
No one noticing anything different
As I walk through my motions.
I laugh and cry
When I’m suppose to;
Wearing my multitude of masks
Day by day smiling that smile again.
A pretty little hollow doll that seems real.
All the world is a stage and
The curtain rises with the spotlight hitting me.
I know just the right words to say
In order to survive another day on this stage.
The words required to stay sane and save face,
In a world I don’t feel like I belong.
Always playing my part well without fail.
However, when the curtain closes for […]
Feel free to IM me on aim. SynysterWays00