Tag:

abused

Worst

by evildandelions 12/16/2015

written by evildandelions

Today, as I wracked with sobs, hiding from my parents and my visiting friend, never have I ever wanted to be dead as much.

I am so angry-sad that, in the first time I can remember, I was so close to being truly happy only to have it snatched away literally weeks before it could’ve happened. I could’ve been not depressed (or significantly less so) and still be engaged to the woman I love. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

Even after everything I’ve been through, this might be the worst. Maybe because I was so close to being happy, that it was actually attainable. […]

12/16/2015 2 comments

Anyone else sexually abused as a child?

by Mikemike 11/15/2015

written by Mikemike

I was raped when I was 7 years old, and im so fucking broken it hurts, I don’t feel empathy in the same way others do, I feel emotional pain much more acutely than most people do. To others, suicide is an unspoken tragedy, but for me it is an escape.

11/15/2015 17 comments

i just really miss being a little kid…

by spvnalittlelie 11/11/2015

written by spvnalittlelie

and i don’t even care if that sounds dumb. i can’t lie about how i feel, life was just better when i was a kid. i didn’t have the best childhood, but i wasn’t abused and at least i wasn’t depressed. i still had a capacity for fun and adventure, whereas now it takes a herculean amount of strength to face each day, and i feel ‘blah’ about everything. nothing is fun anymore. the years 2002-2007 stand out for me, i was young enough to still have a rosy view of the world. things went south after 08, 2009-10 was kind of the point of […]

11/11/2015 4 comments

My Story.

by Overlife 10/27/2015

written by Overlife

So in short my ex chose weed over me. Abused me. Made me feel me feel worthless, I got diagnosed with Depression, Anxiety, Social Anxiety and anorexia. I’ve been in and out of hospital 7 times in the last 6 months because of 2 suicide attempts and the rest for not eating. I’m scared of living so I want to die. I just haven’t succeeded yet. I don’t see my life going anywhere but down. I’ve been on anti depressants for 3 months and recently came off them. I drink to forget who I am and wake up not knowing where I am. I’m a […]

10/27/2015 3 comments

Suicidal but not depressed

by blue-eyed-suicide 10/25/2015

written by blue-eyed-suicide

Most suicidal people want to die because they are suffering and want to escape the pain. I feel like I’ve overcome my depression, but I still want to die because I think I am not worthy of living. I used to be in an extremely dark place, but now I can feel happiness, but the problem is I don’t deserve it.

So I am socially retarded, diagnosed with Asperger’s. My face and body language barely show any emotion. It’s hard for me to say something as simple as “Hello” or “Goodbye”. I can’t hold or start a conversation, when people ask me questions I literally can’t […]

10/25/2015 9 comments

Unimportant post

by InhalingAnxiety 10/21/2015

written by InhalingAnxiety

Hi. It’s just me complaining and rambling again.

10/21/2015 3 comments

a new start?

by onlyoption 10/13/2015

written by onlyoption

* lame mushy relationship problem* I met a nice guy, genuinely true and honest and down right lovely, described by his friend as the ‘virginest virgin’. we’ve been closeish friends for a year, and a week ago we found out we both liked each other. we are both awkward. its been so awkward. he knows all about me, my depression, suicide attempts, self harm, anxiety attacks, being sexually abused as a toddler and then being used for sex by paedophiles at 13. (now 18, new guy is a few months younger than me) I told him I’m not ready for anything physical and he seems […]

10/13/2015 6 comments

Tired

by whydoiwantto 9/16/2015

written by whydoiwantto

I’m tired of feeling like this every day. I keep waiting for the right time, that will hurt my family the least. In between birthdays. Far away from home. I wish it was simpler, that I could make my choice and fuck all the consequences. But I have this huge guilt about leaving my friends and family, especially my brothers and my mom.

I have had many failed attempts and this has hurt my family. I want to ensure everything is successful next time. I think obsessively about methods and timing, around 10-30 times a day. I’m on anti depressants but they don’t help. The only […]

9/16/2015 4 comments

So im back…

by onlyoption 9/14/2015

written by onlyoption

what hope is there for a kid that was molested and abused at 3, who let it happen again and again until 15 when they suddenly realised it was wrong? I’m 18 now and still don’t know what is normal. rape and abuse was standard for me, and the thought of someone treating me as an equal scares me, if they were to listen when I said no, how would I ever please them? there’s so little hope of finding happiness and acceptance now… maybe its not worth sticking around, maybe I’m too far gone to be normal.

9/14/2015 1 comment

We’ve (I’ve) Got Issues

by kathunt15 9/5/2015

written by kathunt15

June 27, 2015 at 6:15 AM

From: Kathryn Marie Hunter (Me)

To: Rick and Maggie Hunter (My parents)

This letter may come as a surprise to you, but I assure that it was a long time coming. Before this past week, I didn’t have the support to do this, but now I’m surrounded by people willing to help. This isn’t to upset you, but rather to give you a rude awakening.

The Katy you know is not the real one. The real me has hidden from you since 3rd grade, and has stayed in hiding until now. You have not noticed this, as you believe fallacies, and deny the […]

9/5/2015 5 comments

terrible night

by bubbles1128 9/1/2015

written by bubbles1128

He has no idea he hurt me
He will never know he abused me
Tore my soul wide open
I hold onto the pain
Like a terrible broken treasure
It’s mine
Only mine
You’re stronger than me
Now we know
You get your way
Now I know
Are you proud?
It wasn’t my first
But I will never forget
The night you thought I was playing
The night you fought for my love
Took the “love” you wanted
I keep the clothes to never forget
The night that zipper broke
My reminder to never trust a guy
Now no one will know
Not even you.

9/1/2015 0 comment

goodbye everybody

by luseskruw 8/26/2015

written by luseskruw

Today’s the day. I am killing myself today.

Just wanted to say goodbye? IDK, my family doesn’t give a fuck about me and I just wanted to say goodbye to somebody.

If you must know, I have been suicidal since I was 17 (I’m now 26). This all feels very pointless to type but I’ll type it anyway.

I was so neglected by my parents that I was allowed to become morbidly obsese. At 12/13 y.o. I weighed 240lbs. I was harrassed and ridiculed on a daily basis in Junior High and it was torture, I grew to absolutely loathe waking up every day and felt like a […]

8/26/2015 5 comments

30 question survey. Curious to know your answers too.

by CalamityX 8/19/2015

written by CalamityX

1. What’s your age? I am 19
2. Are you religious at all? I used to be more than I am now. Illnesses will wake you up to reality and you start believing what’s really true. What’s your stance? Atheist.
3. What’s your first memory as a child, the earliest you can remember? My step dad yelling at my mother and being scared in my room, crying my eyes out. I was 3 years old.
4. What’s the best memory you have in your whole life up until now? Being with my great grandpa in an old WWII museum as he told me stories of […]

8/19/2015 51 comments

#SuckMyFuckDepression

by MaybeImAlreadyGone 8/10/2015

written by MaybeImAlreadyGone

Just a few things on my mind and I may seem harsh but reading some of these comments are making me ill. Your all encouraging each other to take your life’s? Giving each other options for easy ways out? I have been in the exact same situation as many of you&it does get better. We don’t need to encourage each other to take the easy way out. We need to be sharing some fucking hope! So if I come across as harsh, it’s because I generally care.

First of all, I don’t give a shit what anyone says; There is no reason why you should take […]

8/10/2015 16 comments

not sure where to start….

by ggrooms123 8/10/2015

written by ggrooms123

I guess I am writing this for everyone else out there who understands what I’ve gone through. To know you aren’t alone nor are you ever alone no matter how much you may feel that way its not true. I have been battling depression and suicidal tendencies since I was 8 years old. From age 9 to 17 I was raped and molested by my friends father. He is in jail now, but it really messed me up. I started cutting starving binging and purging because i needed to control something again because of how much I had lost. I didn’t know what else to […]

8/10/2015 2 comments

i think i know how

by Mark_1981 8/4/2015

written by Mark_1981

I have read The Peaceful Pill and I think I know how I’d like to go. I won’t post it but knowing the how somehow gives me a slight sense of peace in amongst all the chaos.

A very small part of me tells me to keep going, struggle on. A mountainous part of me however speaks to the contrary telling me that my struggle has been long (and it has) with no hope of living any sort of life away from the angst that consumes me. I have posted before parts of my struggles. They don’t begin to explain the war that exists inside of […]

8/4/2015 3 comments

NEVER FUCKING GIVE UP

by dontfuckinggiveup 8/4/2015

written by dontfuckinggiveup

sometimes i just want to die! as most of us fucking do but seriously whats the point? to show everyone our life was shit? to let them win? well no thats fucking bullshit if we want to die its their fault and if we do kill ourselves that means that u r letting them win! dont you want to prove to these douche bags that we can achieve our dreams and that we arent worthless and even if we were sexually harrassed, or abused, or just treated terribly, or r strugging with depression dont u want to prove the rest of the world wrong? stay […]

8/4/2015 7 comments

Competition

by dead 7/27/2015

written by dead

nothing irritates me more than being compared to others. If I say I’m a fuck up, don’t ask if I’m the most fucked up person in the world. If I am sad, don’t tell me “at least you aren’t homeless, broke, abused” whatever. Don’t tell me how people have it worse or how small and irrelevant my problems are. They’re still fucking issues that effect me. Don’t make me feel small, unnecessary, irrelevant. That is the most shallow thing someone can say to another person on a suicide website, a suicide network. Fuck you. Sadness isn’t a competition.

7/27/2015 14 comments

My life, Chapter 1 (age zero to 5)

by wndozh8er 7/24/2015

written by wndozh8er

I was scrolling though my calendar on my iPad, remembering dates. As I scrolled it seemed like life flashed before my eyes. Where did I go wrong? I have a great memory so I looked at all the months of my life (December 1983 till now) and counted the good times and bad.

I heard my first two years of my life was very chaotic. I don’t think I have any memories at all back then. My parents got divorced when I was two.

One of my first memories as a child was in the summer of 1986. My mother (who is a psychopath herself) was fighting […]

7/24/2015 4 comments

The cat

by wallflower81 7/23/2015

written by wallflower81

I don’t know my family very well. I’m not very close to anyone, no cousins no friends.
My whole life I wished for that closeness to someone. My dad left my mom when I was very young, she would always choose her boyfriend (at the time) over me.
I ended up in homeless shelters before I was 18. I didn’t know how to love or except anyone. I was so jealous of people with their happy family and close sibling relationships.
I became a raging alcoholic while trying to keep myself financially stable, wishing that death would find me soon.
I ended up at the […]

7/23/2015 6 comments

Newer Posts

Older Posts