All my life I knew something was different about me… Maybe it was how self conscious I became when my parents couldn’t afford to have more than one or two outfits that fit me when I was little. Or maybe it was how hard my mom tried to make my brother and I happy, but my dad always tore her down.. Maybe it was my parents always being to busy to come to any of my school concerts and events? Maybe it was just me? All I know is that through it all, no matter who I have around me, trying to support me.. I […]
Ive been through so much in life and have never been this low…im so broken idk what to do or who to talk to im alone in a place i dont want to b… :'(
I stand alone in a world filled with nothing but hate.
i stand alone with my tears falling to the floor.
All i want is for someone to hear my cries and to go to a place filled with nothing but warmth this is my only wish.
I know I am nothing more then an empty hollow shell my soul is gone my heart is numb and I am invisible to the world.
I stand alone crying in a quiet place hopeing some one hears me.
I want to live but I am tired of fighting this world on my own.
I known that if I kill myself I […]
I sit alone crying and afraid to be hurt in the next minute. Then, it hits me. No one likes me, no one helps me, NO ONE F***ING CARES NOR WANTS ME. WHY BOT JUST END IT! WHY WONT I DO IT! I WANT IT!
Today I woke up feeling really depressed, so much so that I was in my room from 8am until about 4pm because I just wanted to be left alone.
When I got out to use the bathroom, I saw my keyboard. Now, even though I’ve never considered myself “good” at playing, I thought why not try and learn a song. And I did. After feeling the most depressed I’ve felt in days, I was able to escape and now I’m feeling not good but not bad either.
This post is kinda pointless, but I just wanted to share that playing an instrument, even if you’re […]
May the angels protect you
Trouble neglect you
And heaven accept you when its time to go home
May you always have plenty
Your glass never empty
And know in your belly
You’re never alone
May your tears come from laughing
You find friends worth having
With every year passing
They mean more than gold
May you win but stay humble
Smile more than grumble
And know when you stumble
You’re never alone
Never alone
Never alone
I’ll be in every beat of your heart
When you face the unknown
Wherever you fly
This isn’t goodbye
My love will follow you, stay with you
Baby, you’re never […]
Enrolled into the university. Mother had to leave me alone in the capital, giant and unforgiving, because we are from a little city (6 h from the one I’m currently in). I’ve always felt I don’t belong but now more than ever. Sneaked into a tall building unaware of it’s security. Turned out there were lattices on every window and the exit to the roof was blocked. First suicide fail. Peace is the only thing I’m craving for right now. Might be my last post. I have no knowledge of what’s lying ahead. Love, my gratitude & good luck, Hikari.
I don’t know what to do anymore. It’s like a crippling black hole inside of me is sucking the life out of me. I feel so alone, I am so alone. I have two friends at college but they’re busy most of the time with work and class, leaving me in my solitude. I don’t want to go on anymore, I want to relapse on cutting when I’ve been mainly clean for nearly three years, but I don’t want the scars, the repercussions, the consequences. I just need something, an outlet. I’m so lost, so hopeless. I want to curl up and die, disappear, not […]
I hate that I have to struggle to find reasons to get out of bed to pretend to be human. I’ve had so many traumatic experiences and have lost someone I love and every day is the same I’m always alone. The thing about suicide is it feels like I should stop wasting my time with a miserable humiliating life that no one would want. I often wonder if I’m genetically inferior because I’ve always gotten sick easily and have had depression since I was 11. I was supposed to die when I was born and I wonder if I’m being punished for still being […]
I have the worst life story ever ,All of my life I was alone and depressed I used to cry a lot and I have cut my self in the age of 13 ,I am now 20 but still feeling so alone and worthless ,My life changed when I’ve finished High school and it became better .. but after the first semester of university so many problems came to me at once ,and I’ve met bad people that made my life a living hell ,Felt in love with the wrong person .. and he broke my heart in the worst ways .. and in the […]
it sucks having no real friends 🙁 I love all the people I meet in the internet, here, but at the end of the day we are alone. I live in a big city and its depressing. everyone has a great life and knowing I don’t its depressing. my so called friend called me a ‘deppresive person’ . I told him my story and it seems he doesn’t understand. I feel so alone. suicide I want that that carbon monoxide. im thinking about it over and over again. what do you believe after death? what are your beliefs? I’ve been told suicide is sin and […]
They think you’re crazy,
they think you’re mad.
They call you stupid,worthless,
tell you you’re not worth it.
Now you’re walking back,
to a place you call home,
but you feel so alone.
The same hurtful hits,
it’s your darker place.
In your virgin ears,
the remarks they make.
And if they knew, if they really knew
all of those things.
That you do in your room,
to hide the pain.
I bet their minds would change.
I’ll bet their minds would change.
They’d change,if they knew the pain.
Today is my birthday. I never celebrate and rarely tell others that it’s today. Unfortunately, my family knows, so i have to deal with them coming over and bringing some food and blablabla.
I d like to spend it alone, thinking about how im still not moving forward. Thinking that its just another year of failures, disapointments and suffering.
If everything goes alright, 2016 august 28 will be a lot better. It will be my last anniverssary and my last day alive
Why do I have to feel this way everyday. I’m so sick and tired of crying. I have no one to talk to. They’re all using me. This is my only way to let my feelings out. I don’t think I should hold them in anymore. But I don’t want to be here. I miss my grandma. I don’t want to be alone anymore.
Not necessarily suicide (though it can be if you want), but just death in general. Tell me: Age, exact cause of death, and misc information (optional). For me, I think I’d like to die at around age 31 (because I get to experience my billionth second), suicide, after I become a professor.
Just wish that people would give me space
Just wish my parents would leave me alone
Just wish I could grow up and leave
Just wish that i was smarter, prettier, more athletic
Just wish that everything would end
Just wish that I wasn’t born
Just wish that I didn’t feel this way
Well, it’s the third day since I’ve left my dad’s house, yesterday I was very confident that everything would work just fine, now I’m not that sure… I’ve been feeling simply terrible since that, I simply don’t know what to do, which way to follow, I just want want someone to speak with, but who would want to be with me at a time like that? Even I don’t want to, I wish I could simply feel better but I can’t I don’t know for sure what’s wrong, but I’m sure something is just off… so many months and years having my feelings only for […]
She sat alone,
alone and at home,
where her screams were silent,
but her mind was violent.
Her insecurities hid deep inside,
and they indeed eat her alive,
a tear rolled down her face,
as her heart begin to race.
She took her blade and tore her skin,
where her depression lies deep within,
this went on my days, months, years,
and untill she cried her very last tears,
she decided she had enough,
the world around her was much to tough.
She took a gun to her head,
congradalations society,
she is dead.
And so, maybe I should say it
I repent for today
Until for the next day
Where I’m just going to go play
And hopefully, I won’t repent in this way
It was just a bad mix with, the onion
To balance, perspicacity to thine situation
Humbling, always in discourse from within
Crumbling
Until for the next day
Where I’m just going to go play
And hopefully, I won’t have to repent in this way
…
You see, it involves of a kind of lonesome; me
Maybe more, of a solitude
Maybe, like a Weezing, wandering alone
In a room
I hope that it went okay, and that you did become
The Moon, and the Sun
I feel like it’s time. But I don’t want it to be. I made a promise to myself, you see. I promised to wait until I was 21 to find something to live for.
Even though I really want to wait, I’m just tired. Waiting is probably the best way to describe my life and I feel like I can’t take it. Also, my head hurts all the time, without apparent reason. I don’t want to feel pain anymore, but I don’t want others to suffer because of me.
I’ve always prefered to be hurt if that means that someone doesn’t. Maybe that didn’t make […]