I’m old, sick, and alone and I’m going to do it very soon because I found out that I happen to have the right combination of pills to take with alcohol. I’ve had a hard life but all you kids who are thinking of doing it need to realize that you will go through life and have hard times and good times. Things do get better until you are old, sick, and alone. That’s when you have the moral right to do away with yourself! I’ve been homeless in my 50s and still didn’t do it then. My ex husband tried to get me to […]
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alone
In the last week my amazing job has stopped being amazing. I moved stores to help this store achieve success, I was told id be stepping on toes but in time it would dissipate. Now it seems the person who feels threatened by me has put in a complaint, unsure of the nature I asked and was told I couldn’t be told and that a note would be placed in my file. I’m not allowed to face my accuser or defend myself, it doesn’t make sense. Considering I was aware when I took the position that it would be hard for the older staff member […]
All I can ask for is help at this point. I feel like the further I go in life the more I wish I could just stand still. Fear is all I feel most of the time. I fell it when I’m at school, when I go out, when I’m talking to my bestfriend, when I’m talking to anyone. It’s the fear of being judge, rejected, the fear of not being accepted. Fear is not all I feel though. I fell well in the only way I can put it… Alone. Alone and scared. I feel alone bc I feel there is nothing more I […]
the other night I was going to hang myself but he called me… he doesn’t have his phone anymore so he had steal his dad’s for a few minutes I want him to come home i haven’t heard from him since now I just want to die again:'(
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. tawneesmommy@gmail.com for full story. I’ve been in process of typing all I’ve been through in life but it’s taking me a long time….:(I am so alone
I just wanted to say that with today being my first day on here I’m glad to know I’m not so alone in these feelings… I truly hope we can all find happiness!
I force myself to go out alone. It is a feeble attempt to pretend I have a life. Everyone always says go out meet people do your own thing. Blah Blah Blah. I do freaking everything alone what I miss is human companionship. So, I am out having a beer watching football. I am surrounded by groups of friends and families. I am jealous and sad. I look and wonder what it is they have I don’t that. I can’t be that bad, my therapist always said everyone deserves love as is. As is in the sense of big small issues or no issues. It’s […]
Hi, I’ve never posted on a site like this before about how Im feeling or doing with things. Idk if anyone will read my crap on here or not. Doesnt really matter. I feel empty inside. I have no energy, no strength, no anything to do anything. I force myself to go to work. When I’m there, I’m better, but i’ve been getting worse lately. Ive had to hold my stomach throughout the day because I hurt so much. My emotional pain has become physical. Dunno where to start. how bout, I have always had depression and suicide as a way side thought. Moved to […]
I often wonder how we can be so alone in this overpopulated world??? Such a sad existence once you survive the unsurvivable! Everyone/everything you once knew continues on like you were never there. We are so insignificant alone!!! 1 more day closer to the end, so curious to see what happens yet so reluctant. Goodnight world!!!
I feel empty inside
There’s a void I cannot fill
I drink the emptiness away
I smoke the emptiness away
I roll to take the emptiness away
Though these temporary solutions
Hold no effect once I be sober
I miss the touch of a gentle human hand
I miss the warmth of another’s embrace
I miss the smile that follows the sweet words spoken
I miss being loved by another
I curl up and hold myself tight at night
My pillow squished in my comforting embrace
I close my eyes and dream of a paradise
One where a man adores me for me
Holds me and tells […]
For a while I didn’t create an account on here and a lot of posts are just inspiring and resonate a lot.
I bookmarked a couple and thought about taking bits and pieces and making a collage with quotes.
Can anyone else suggest other ideas?
I just think it’s nice to be reminded it’s okay to feel the way you do and that you’re not alone.
As I write this, I’m sitting in bed with a loaded 9mm and capt Morgan white rum.
For the life of me I don’t get why I can’t do it, all my life all I’ve whined about and cursed god to do was take my life, yet presented with the opportunity I can’t do it… This is NOT a plead for help nor is it having second thoughts, my life has been shitty since birth! The usual… Father issues, my whole family gives me the cold shoulder.hell, one of my aunts thought it would be a good idea to tell me how my mother was […]
Somehow i always end up back here… back to my blog thats held my darkest secrets. I guess i find some comfort in that sp will always be here to listen. ive turned to tumblr recently which ive been venting on… but on here its different. every time i come on i feel like ive lost a battle; except this time i can truthfully say i dont want to die; i have so much more living to do… but i am so sad. i’m lonely and i hate feeling this way. I feel anxious all the time, i feel helpless, alone and i hate living […]
I want to die. All I can think about is that, and how I have no friends (save for a few I have online), how I have never had a boyfriend (except for an online one), how I won’t ever be able to make friends or get a boyfriend in real life, how I’ve been sitting around the house doing basically nothing ever since I dropped out of school in March, how I won’t be able to start some (online) college classes this semester, how my parents have forever been disappointed in me, how I can’t get a job because I can’t drive yet, how I feel completely unmotivated […]
If my suffering could be manifested physically, I’m sure everyone would be okay with me leaving
by timetogonow
written by timetogonow
First time I tried to kill myself, I was 16. I overdosed and was hospitalised. I was raped and bullied. I left hospital and ignored calls from the police.
For the next five years, I felt myself losing a sense of who I was. A straight-A, goody two shoes, quit college (UK meaning of the word). I started over, but skipped school a lot. I ended up getting two As and a B at A Level. I got into a good university to study law, but I think they just wanted my money from international fees. I got a 2:1 with honours, but by the scrape […]
As I breathe deep and clear, even though you’re there I feel alone. I stand waiting as I’m here wandering capturing the capacity of everyone’s joy and laughter.
Though the key to myself is lost. I can’t live as before, where it was easy to become a friend to someone.
As I open my eyes I’m slowly becoming tortured by the way I feel with myself. How do I stop becoming this way I ask.
One day though it will become better as for all of us.
I stand alone
A group of laughing people to my right
I stand alone
The rushing cars passing me to my left
I stand alone
The cold chill of the winter breeze blowing through my hair
I stand alone
In visioning myself some place else
I stand alone
As the dark clouds begin to loom lower
I stand alone
As the moon begins to rise in the night sky
I stand alone
Until it’s time to go back home
I sleep alone
Dreading the next day of which I’ll once again stand alone
A cycle that will never end
No matter how much my human brain likes to think otherwise, I am completely and utterly alone.
Yesterday I was arrested on the GG bridge for a suicide attempt. I was there. I had it. The motivation was there. My leg started to climb up over the railing. Then I saw the police coming. Now this was REALLY it. I could either just use my other leg and take the leap, or go back the other way and let the cops take me into custody. Unfortunately, I’m still here which means I succumbed to the arms of two policeman.
To those who haven’t seen it, the view is incredible. Such a serene feeling knowing that you could take your life right then and […]
I have finally given up my will to live. I know that there’s no point, when all I have to look forward to is more of the same. Even if I were to manage to get through this period in my life, it would just be another rotation of the wheel that is my mental health. I might be able to get help and become “happy” again, but my depression will just come back around again and again. So I’ve given up the will to fight any longer. That part of me is gone. My will is dead. Like it was a real person. Will […]
What it’s like to live under a bridge.
Living under a bridge can be rough. It’s dirty, muggy, and this often results in the troll being grumpy. The troll has good reason to be grumpy though. Not only are its living conditions disgusting, but also it gets to hear the footsteps of those above him all day long. All day…clunk thump; people walk by without noticing the grumpy old troll under the bridge. The troll didn’t used to be so grumpy. He was born into a nice family, but he was a fidgety troll. Therefore, his family began to dislike him and identify him as being […]