I think about how life can be. And to tell you mylife story its going to be a hell of a ride.
it began when i was only 6 yrs of age n my brother interfer with me. N wen i was 10 my father die. 13yrs my two sisters die n my mum die wen i was 15. But it didnt stop there my bother keeps on interfering with me until i was 17 n pregant . Then i ran away from bein abuse but he found me n beat me. Wen i make my girl child i was scared of what he might do. […]
I think this has to be one of my favourite quotes (not of my own creation, but well-liked all the same).
Rather than believing in the typical meaning behind this quote that just because you grow older and ‘wiser’, it does not mean that you will also mature in body, mind and soul; I personally interpretated this quote, due to my own experiences etc., as saying that sometimes no matter how hard you try for a period of time – whether it’s a few days or a few years -, your mind will never change. I suppose this could be passed as ignorance but that is […]
All my life ive been bully by one being well if u can call him that and the worse is it was my brother he teased me antagonized me bully me and call me names its gotten so bad I uncontrollably beat him with objets its hurts me but saves me ive tried g o kill myself many times but then I think what about my loved ones
Tomorrow is the day my mom finds out I wont be graduating. I am so scared because she will beat me very badly when she finds out. Im going through enough with my depression. And now my anxiety is kicking in.
I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that i’m ready to leave. The only thing that keeps me here is the responsibilities I feel I owe my family. I’m 19 years old, and the only boy in my family. 2 sisters and my single mother. So you can imagine the huge amount of pressure I’m under to succeed. We have always been broke. Growing up my mother had many boyfriends come and go, many of them physically abusive toward her and me. (never my sisters though). As a child growing up I had Enormous potential, I’m extremely intelligent, there’s no denying as I have […]
While generally I don’t adorn purely musical/lyrical posts… There is little point to be human if you don’t find yourself hypocritical.
“If you don’t have a song
To sing you’re okay
You know how to get along
Humming
Hmmm
If you don’t have a date
Celebrate
Go out and sit on the lawn
And do nothing
‘Cause it’s just what you must do
Nobody does it anymore
No I don’t believe in the wasting of time,
But I don’t believe that I’m wasting mine
If you don’t have a point to make
Don’t sweat it
You’ll make a sharp one being so kind
And I’d sure appreciate it
Everyone […]
all i cannot say i pour out here even tho it feels so painful in a way. i was told to practice self-compassion and i cant. i cant believe anyone cares. the ones who do are the outsiders. everyone else – nope. ive been dealing with really bad depression and isolation. it is hard not to beat yourself up. my heart just had a huge jolt from noise, for me, noise brings up the past. i wonder how much longer i can bare this. my online friend said if i end my life i dont go to a better place and am still “me” and […]
Down the street
Dragging my feet
Until my soles
Look bloody and beat
Zooming past
No thought is given
I wander through
And search for the hidden
Firelight dancing
Catching me
Bringing me close
A light has been brought
The cleansing flame
To guide me down
Into the vacant state
Of my mind
Glaring at my dismissal
Unchecked we are free
Now go forth
I’m the only member of my immediate family that is alone. I don’t fit in or figure into their lives. They make plans and do things without even asking if I’m interested. I’m the proverbial 5th wheel. So when I die I don’t expect they’ll really miss me. I can’t even work anymore because of my heart. I understand loneliness. I truly believe no one even wants to love me. What do I have to offer a potential partner?
Those of you who have “seen” me on here for 5 years know that I have a badly damaged heart and had to quit the job I […]
This isn’t something I typically talk about because it isn’t an easy subject to approach. I’m going back to my doctor soon to figure out how far things have progressed or if they’ve changed at all. I really don’t think I want to know. I’m so tired of this.
I would kill to feel like I could trust someone. Anyone. But people come into my life and I throw them away just as quickly. Id rather hurt them than let them hurt me. Might as well beat them to the punch. Right?
In all honesty, I’m scared. Of everything. I don’t know where to turn. don’t […]
(I sound crazy??You must not know me then;).)
I want a fing drink. Being sober is nice most of the time… The thought of booze is great, but really you turn into a blathering idiot.
What the hell do i di? Hes told me he did this to his ex wife. That he can break all my teeth out, and bail out the next day. I can take alot, but he covered my nose and mouth with me in a headlock, and than i REALLY understood, he could kill me. Its great for him, because no one would evwn look. I dont speak to my family, have no friends anymore. The only people […]
This is a fairly long rant so I apologize ahead of time.
I read up on something called emotional abuse today. Apparently I myself am being abused. To put things into context I’m in 9th grade and I live with my father. I had thought abuse was when a parent raped you or beat you up everyday. Multiple sources said it isn’t always physical. My father’s been abusive for as long as i can remember; the earliest dating back to when I was maybe two and he nearly pushed me down a flight of stairs. I always thought his temper was normal, that this was just […]
It’s been 6 mounts since I last posted on here I’ve been trying to stay positive and trying to move on with my life I got a new partner. Who some what understands my mental Heath. What’s nice I stared volunteering at mind, a charity for mental Heath. And I’m going away with my family in 3 weeks. But I still car’t beat my thoughts of suicide and I rock bottom lows. I’ve been manic for the past week with suicidal thoughts (dose anyone els get suicidal thoughts when they are manic.
ll of my life I’ve been abused and I’m now 37 and it still keeps coming, as a child I was neglected and underfed by my parents who also knowinly sent me to my grandfathers house where I was sexually assaulted constantly and raped by him and his friend, I cried out and nobody believed me and I kept getting sent back to him,
all through my adult life I’ve been abused by various girlfriends and again nobody believed me and now for the last 4 years its been happening again, I’ve been kept locked away in a house with a crazy woman who beat me […]
my past is bad i was sexually abused and beat. My real dad died when i was two of a car wreck.Ive attempted suicide three times in my life and the last time i almost ended it. I still self harm and its how i cope with all the things that i go through.
So basically i dont know what to do.
Ive had depression for a few years now. When i was about 8 my dad started to get drunk a lot and he would hit me randomly. At first i didnt care but as time went on he started to hit me more and harder. But when i was ten i told my dad i wanted to try boxing and then he stood up barely because he was drunk as fuck and he was like “so you want to do boxing?” Then he punched me as hard as he could and i cried a little and he […]
I don’t mean to be selfish, but my life is a living hellhole. Everyday I come home, scared of my father, because if he finds out about my grades, he will force my hand here.
Some days I wish he would beat me. But he doesn’t. He verbally whips me. Some days I wish I could just run away and be done with my “great” family. If found out I may have depression. And if I told anyone, they would not believe. No one believes anything they don’t see or feel. Something they don’t believe in. Something that isn’t tangible to them. And such describes the […]
Im female, I’m 14 and have been self harming for 3yrs now. I was raped 5 times all by different people, beat by my step mom, ignored by my father, and I have tried to kill myself countless times. I have a few close friends that know what I’ve gone through and I have a girlfriend who is completely oblivious to the shit I’ve gone through… I just wanted to put a brief summary of my story out there so people know that sometimes it could be worst. Try and stay strong
My life is hell ive been in a house that i hate with bullied for 2 years
my moms boyfriends house his kids hate me and i hate them
they got my hooked on weed and it fucks me up
ive been pushed down stairs they have burned me beat me and one forced me into sex
Im 13 and im not a virgin
ive regretted my life since i moved to this hell hole
people at school bully me i tell them to go to hell or say fuck of or even give them the finger
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