Mom: I cannot thank you enough for all that you have done for the family. Thank you for working so hard to pay for necessities, housing, and my medical bills. You will no longer have to deal with that though. The end is near. I’d like to also add that I wish you understood the way I have felt all of my life. The words I recall hearing still hurt me until this very day: “a mistake,” to Rebecca. The beatings were not a lesson learned, nor helpful to my self-development. Your yelling and screaming did nothing but torment me, I never wanted to hear […]
Beatings
Jladd here as all of you know and i figured you guys would like to hear my story.
My mom never use to be a drunk or violent. She was once a normal beautiful women who would give you the shirt off her back. But that’s not the case now. I have two brothers and a sister. And then one adopted brother and sister. My mother never use to hit me or anything like that but it all started after we moved into our new house and she lost her job. My stepdad was always at work to support us so i never really saw him and […]
Im 19, A few years after I was Born my parents divorced and my mom and I moved away from the big city to a smaller city not to far. The divorced didnt effect me much because I was so young but it showed in my mother and she began to drink a lot.
by the time I was in grade 3 I was very unhappy with life, There was rarely any food to eat in the house and I was in a very abusive relationship with my mother. I was regularly running away from home and staying with my grandmother who lived in the same […]
It seems people don’t
care anymore.
Every night I cry, waiting for the day when my suffering ends. But I can’t wait. Its alnost my birthday, but what do I get? Beatings and insults that’s what. My name meant happy. But I never feel that way anymore. I was never destined for happiness. My name should have meant suffering.
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Please give me your best advice
I am a 33 year old mother of two, I was with the father of my son & daughter for 12 .1/2 years. I was 16 when we started our relationship. He was 10 years older then me and how I found out was though finding his driving licence as he told me when we first met that he was 21:- (26)was the truth  even then he still tried to say it was a fake. I should of realised then what he was all about but being only 16 young and being my first love I was blind!! I […]
My father once said to me, “Life dealt you a really shitty hand, but all you can do is play the hand your dealt.” That was before I lost bladder function. I did not think to say to him at the time, “Well dad, I can always fold.” I was born unto a house of pain, and now I have to deal with health issues on top of all the psychological issues, all the arrests, all the beatings, all the hospitalizations, all the incarcerations, and for not ever really even breaking the law. I have been locked in a dry cell with nothing in it, no plumbing, no […]
I’m sick of them saying to me “All that matters is that you’re ok” or “well thank god you’re alive” . No. Just stop leave me alone with your lies, I should have died that day. “At least your alive” for what ?! To live with the pain, insults, complaints, threats, beatings, verbal abuse, yelling , hitting I just can’t take it anymore . But hey at least I’m alive( to suffer). I don’t even know why I’m here, I’m tired of everything and everyone . Living a life I don’t want or feel satisfied in , I hate living in society and doing things […]
i fucking hate my mind. it plays such horrible games with me. i cant stop thinking about the beatings i would get from my mom. and each one is more vivid than the last. looks like im going to wind up cutting..again. such a fucking failure.
Life was always hard on me, from the day I was born.. with an alcohlic father who had abandoned me and my mother when I was 2 and a mother who’s hobby is to blame me for everything and yell at me.. Really no one to care for me at this age. I was always alone and I tried my best to always get out of the house as much as I could because why would I stay there..
When I got older and there had been more yelling towards me, neglect, and beatings.. I even remember one time when i was in grade 2 and […]
When I was a little girl, I knew nothing of the word ‘ hate ‘ . I knew no sadness, I was so carefree, I did what I could to make others pleased. I was blind to what my brother was doing to me , blind to see that it wasn’t my fault. After I walked in on my first brother shooting him self in the head , my sweet careless brother
. I noticed my second brother had changed toward me , I noticed he was more hostile. He beat me every night , he kicked my ribs till’ I heard them crack. He […]
stupid broken life.
almost every night, awful dreams about hiding, being emotionally stripped by what they do to me.
i don’t need to worry about money. i don’t need to worry about what career i should take. i don’t need to worry about how i look. pretty good huh?
every day i wake up and for a second i forget who i am. then the pain comes. it hurts inside, everywhere. all the time. it tints my vision. i am numb usually. i don’t feel real. nothing feels real. it’s my mind’s way of protecting me. so every minute, one minute at a time, i am alive.
always anxious. […]
Nothing, that’s what I am, and that’s what I feel. I may be breathing but, I am not living. Nothing that I ever do is ever good enough for anyone, and it never will be. For years I used to blame those that were around me for the way that I am, but maybe all along it has only truly been me. Maybe the beatings, the abuse, the hatred that others always directed at me was never really their fault, perhaps the blame should have been pointed at me all along. There is no reason for me to live, everything that I have ever held dear to […]
I’ve come to the conclusion that im a complete waste of space, and i want to eliminate this pointless shitstain of an existence i call a life from the face of the earth.
My whole life i was labeled ugly and worthless, and any word that can add the prefix “un” would describe me. Im unathletic, untalented, unattractive, unimportant, unmotivated, uninteresting, unappealing, basically anything you can think of.
I grew up with my father always angry, and telling me i was a worthless human being. He would say it was his way of building me up to be a man, but all it did was make me […]
Why do you hurt me the way you so??
Why do you talk to other girls, am I not good enough for you?
Why do you abuse me, I can’t the beatings much longer.
Why must you lie to me all the time?
Why do you think I am the way I am?
Why do you talk to the nasty hoes you do?
Why do you think I am an idoit?
Why can’t i get real answers from you?
I can’t take this anymore, I can’t takw being beaten by a guy anymore, I’m a girl who is lost for words. I’m just lost and […]
To me, life was an incandescent glow of pure hatred and envy.
It didn’t matter if my mother was dead or alive, because nobody cared.
& like every other life, the world would move on, and I will become nothing but an unwritten part of history.
Every day was painfully alike. Made up of an accumulation of insignificant moments.
Brushing my teeth, combing my hair, getting teased and beaten; all these moments, all these tiny deeds that have accumulated and has become what is now my life.
And each day I would wait, and think that there was a reward waiting for me in the […]
My whole life has been one traumatic event after another. Most of my young childhood memories are of my mother beating on my older brother and sister. When my older sister got married and moved out of the house my mother then turned her aggression towards me. It wasnt so bad as long as i stayed out of her sight. So that is what i did. We moved to texas when I was 12. The first couple of months mother was oddly pleasant. It felt like things may be getting better. Guess again! It was just the calm before the storm. Mother on top of […]
I’ve suffered from post tramatic stress disorder for the past 13 years of my life. And only 2 of those years, I’ve acually been getting some suport through councelers and meds. I’m 19 and I live with my only friend in the world. I have no family and no other friends to support me. I’m broke, job-less and running out of time. For the past month, I have been applying and dropping off resumes everyplace close by, and still I am waiting. I owe my friend and his brother $325.00 for rent and bus pass money. If I don’t get a job soon, I’ll be […]