If you have a broken smile and scars on your skin, stop and read this.
You’re beautiful/ handsome and you can do this. You can make it through today and every day afterwards because guess what?
You’re worth it. You’re worth every moment of life and every breath you take is just showing everyone who has ever put you down that you win, not them. Don’t ever give up.
It sucks being at school seeing everybody happy, in love, socializing or succeeding, while you’re all depressed, broken, lonely, hopeless, and failing
I despise what I am. I have broken laws just to feel pleasure. I have cut just to feel pain. I am numb, I wasn’t always like this but like many events it came with a revelation. I have no friends. They are not there for me even though I’m there for them. I can’t cry I’ve tried many times to make myself, though I just can’t. All people see is my smile. They don’t see me for what I truly am. Numb
I’ve explained it over and over and over again, but I guess I’ll do it again.
I messaged my best friends ex last night, just to talk, and we were all close, and have been through shit. and every time i would say something he’d just say “bye” but after she messaged him, he started being nice to me and talking to me. For some reason it made me feel like complete shit. Like i didn’t matter, until she mattered. I felt worthless. I started crying, and ended up having an anxiety attack.
I was holding that blade so close to my skin, telling myself […]
Well, I am in my final year of my studies. I somehow managed to scrape through the first 3 years but I honestly I don’t know how. This is my 4th year and I have no clue what I have been doing. For 4 years I have not progressed at all. Apart from going to lectures, I spend all my time in my room watching anime, reading or playing games. I have suffered chronic depression for as long as I can remember as well as social anxiety. I hated school beyond words, the worst part about school was break time. I never had anyone to […]
i havent cried in over 4 years, but after she told me she loved him and not me, i lost it. i felt like i had no control over myself, i started cutting my hips with a knife, i stopped after 8. i cut as hard as i could. she called the police because she didnt know what to do. i had to lie to them and say it was a misunderstanding, but the moment they left, i broke down into tears. tonight was a perfect night. it was pouring outside, pitch black out, i literally stood out there for over an hour. now im […]
I am not a newbie when it comes to depression, or anxiety, or suicide. But I am when it comes to talking about it. Why do people have to judge and make it so hard? They are allowed to have broken bones, so why are we not allowed to have broken minds?
Sometimes I’ll just sit there and listen to slow piano music for over an hour.. Because I’m too broken to do anything and i physically can’t do anything.. It’s a hard life.. and it’s been too overwhelming lately.. I can’t go on like this.. I scared of what will happen to me.. I’m going to break soon i know it.. Just a few more panic attacks away..
Slowy dieing of loneliness and a broken heart :'(
I’ve lived the last 5 years with severe depression and I’m sick of everything. Why should I bother anymore? To quote Macbeth; “I am in blood stepped in so far that should I wade no more, returning were as tedious as to go on.” My life is miserable at the moment, has been for a long time, and likely will be for alot longer. I’ve even found that I’m too useless to even help myself; when I make commitments to myself to make a change for the better I always break it and find that I’ll always be the coward I swore I’d never become. […]
That’s how I feel at the moment. If anybody could see who I truly was, I’d be finally, truly alone. Maybe that’s what it will take to get the courage to end everything. I’m stuck in this fucking hole, and when being myself leads to pain, what else have I got than to lie, or to give up the act and let everything fall apart?
Nobody will ever understand who I am and what I still think about doing… if it gives any perspective, I’ve had dreams of killing people and watching them choke on their own blood. That was when I was eight, and the […]
I’m waiting for someone to save me, because I can’t save myself anymore. Superman? God? Man? Woman? Child? Someone…..? I need to start over or end it… I can’t live like this anymore. I am tired of wishing on stars and counting cars.
I am so tired of pretending everything is ok…. I know it isn’t, and I am done lying to myself. I am done trying to make myself look happy when I’m not. I can’t anymore. I’m broken… And I know there’s no fixing this time.
I’ve been wanting this for so long; but now it’s more than a desire, it’s an obsession
I have nothing in my life that gives my living any credibility
I’m just a girl who’s broken beyond repair and this may well be how the rest of my life be like and I do not wish to keep going this way.
I need to go. I have to go.
I’ve been suffering pretty severe depression for roughly four and a half years now. Throughout this entire battle I’ve had with the snakes in my head, the demons in my personality, nothing has helped. I’ve been on different types of drugs, I’ve seen councilors, I’ve talked to friends and family in a search for hope and understanding – and I always end up back in this state of desperation. It’s reasonably well known that there are suicidal people who don’t actively want to die, they just want the pain to cease. The thing is, I actually want to die. I’ve had on and off feelings […]
So its been nearly a year since I tried to kill myself. I did it at the end of last summer, swallowed three bottles of anti-depressants. I did it because I wanted to die, and I was outraged when I woke up still quite alive. However I became even more upset upon learning the level of my injuries. Apparently comitting suicide after leaving home with nowhere to go is a worse idea, particularly in northern Minneapolis. After overdosing and passing out, apparently somebody found me and proceeded to mug me, stealing my few valuables and kicking the shit out of my body.
Not […]
The night before last I let my anchor go – the only person who held me somewhat together. He broke up with me last year after a few years of long distance dating but we remained close friends up until now. He has a new girlfriend and it was clear he was drifting further away from our friendship no matter how much he denied it. I don’t blame him. He was broken like me when I met him, not suicidal that I know of but certainly depressed, and over the years he has gotten better and I have not.
It was probably horrible of me but […]
Today I have a loss again. Someone who I thought I loved and loved me back. Someone who I sacrificed for once upon a time. Someone who I fought for once upon a time. Someone who once upon a time gave me a reason to hold on. Someone who once made me feel warm. Someone for whose sake I picked up the pieces even though I was broken and left dead once.
But I don’t need anyone who doesn’t appreciate me, right? They don’t deserve me. And I myself don’t deserve to keep struggling stupidly for someone who doesn’t appreciate my efforts.
From now onwards I will […]
You know when I was depressed I always had this thought.
I always had this dream, this expectation, this thought.
That a person would come into my life and pick up my broken pieces.
That someone would help me off the ground and get me walking again.
Someone would wipe away my tears and dust me off and hold my hand.
That a human being would sit down with me and just hug me.
That someone would help me calm down and stop me from punching the wall and bruising myself.
Well guess what.
I’m fine now.
I am recovered and still recovering.
No one […]
By the end of my junior year and beginning of my senior year of high school so many things were going through my head. Also at that time my high school ex had broken up with me. So much confusion because she was my first love, we cared about each other tremendously, and she was all i could think about. But when she told me that she didnt want to be together any more it shattered me a bit. I played it cool for a few months, but just seeing her hurt even more. A year has passed and she graduated already. I remember visiting […]
For 5 years I’ve been depressed. That’s a long time. And thinking that it’s all over and I’m finally feeling better about everything in life is only a joke. My 18th birthday comes and no one in my family remembers. I blow out the candles alone and make my wish. Then just one day later, my parents tell me they are divorcing.. constant yelling and screaming. All I can do is collapse on the ground in tears. I’m completely alone now. My parents arnt there. My family is broken. My depression is back. I struggle to hold back anger. Anger at myself. Anger at God […]
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