I can’t do this anymore, I really truly can’t. The stress is too much. The pressure is too much. Everyone expects too much from me, when I can barely even get out of bed in the morning anymore. To my family I am just a failure because I can never meet their expectations. To my friends, I am a burden to have around because I suck the life out of anyone who is near me. I ruin everything that I touch beyond repair, and I am nothing more than a pathetic waste of space. I shouldn’t be on […]
Tag:
Depression
I’ve come to realize that when someone asks any variation of “how are you?” They don’t want to hear the truth. They want to hear something along the lines of “I’m good, thanks.” So they can go on and not feel guilty about not having asked why you’re sad. If you didn’t admit it, you’re not right?
The same goes for when they do actually ask if you’re upset about something. They don’t want to hear that you feel like your entire life is crumbling around you, they just want to look like a caring person for five seconds.
So you hide behind “I’m fine” […]
My best friend is a silver tongued devil, he made me an addict to him. I can’t seem to get away from him at all. He tells me to slide him across my skin when no one is around. I don’t know why it feels so good. I’m addicted…addicted to the release I get from it. I always have him and if I don’t I’m carrying a pencil.
I don’t understand why I’m treated like total crap, no one notices me ever. If I’m noticed they see me in a corner with my hood up. I sit silent not wanting to be beaten up again […]
Reality is boring & LIMITED !!
Real life is boring & LIMITED !!
Real world is boring & LIMITED !!
I also hate this life, I hate people / humans (well.. MOST/90% of them), I hate reality, I hate this world.
its very BORING !! and especially nowadays become ONLY very materialistic, money / profits driven only, all about money, money, money, & image, image, image! ; it’s very superficial, shallow, and mundane boring!
Why movies, video games, comics, books, novels, anime/manga, creative Art, basically human’s IMAGINATION & fantasy is often/always a hundred times FAR much more interesting & better than this sad, mundane, boring, superficial, […]
fuck Reality ! Reality sucks ! Real world sucks ! Real life sucks ! Reality boring ! Real life boring ! Real world boring ! movies, novels books, comics, games, manga/anime are better than Reality !!
by niki
written by niki
fuck Reality ! fuck real life ! fuck real world !
Reality sucks ! Real world sucks ! Real life sucks !
Reality boring ! Real life boring ! Real world boring !
movies, novels, comics, games, manga/anime are better than Reality !!
there is no MAGIC, no SUPERPOWER , no ‘cool, magical’ SUPERHERO / SUPERHEROES like in those movie , novel , comics , game / games , manga / anime , etc etc !
FUCKING BORING real world / real life / reality !!!
I also hate this life, I hate people / humans, I hate reality, I hate this world.
its very BORING […]
Last night, or this morning, I did it again.
I don’t know where I’m going. I don’t know where I’ve been.
I take a disposable razor, and work to get out the blade.
I let it curse my mind, and I let my sweet smile fade.
I take off all loose ends, and make the blade accessible.
Knowing what comes soon, what will become unforgettable.
It’s been a while since the last, will it hurt more?
Will I be able to stand up tall, or crying on the floor.
Does it bother you to know I’m not as perfect as I seem?
Is it troubling to wish that I could escape inside a dream?
As […]
I really need to let my story. I can’t tell anyone and I won’t tell anyone most of this. I’m going to go in order of events, and you tell me if I have a right to kill myself.
I was born in Iraq, during the war. It was horrible. I was never able to have a good night’s sleep. I always thought I was going to get murdered, bombed, raped. I was so scared. I was only 5. When I was 6, a week or two after my birthday, my dad went to work, like usual. On the way there, he got shot twice in […]
Hey, what’s new? Nothing? Well me too. Just been feeling down. I only have 2 BFFs and I spend most of my time on the internet. I’m usually loud, crazy and fun. Now? I’m different. I’m sort of feeling depressed and crying about the littlest things. (No it isn’t menstruation).
I’m new to this website. Don’t hate please.
Just had to get that out there. I’m in 6th grade by the way. I have a scary grandma that makes me cry a lot. I have a loving grandpa and dad. Also I have a dog named Cassie. If you meet my grandma, […]
I´m total failure and I know my life is heading nowhere and I lived in endless hope, but now the hope is totally gone and I don´t want to live anymore in this freaking world .
Dear sister wether this is are final goodbye or the first of many more.i want you to know ive always loved you though you dont feel the same way.i wanted us to have a special bond the kind of sisters who could share anything.instead I became the sister you wanted to get away from.now you got your wish amd hopefully after this letter youll be free.im not just doing this cause of you theres a lot of reason.sure I love you and cant stand you leaving but theres a lot of reasons kind of to many to explain on a single note.i have to let […]
I don’t know what brought me to this website. First I was googling resources on suicide prevention and it brought up a link, and here I am. To start things off, I’m not the kind of girl that would be found on here, according to my friends I’m a social butterfly, friendly, sweet and kind hearted. Why I may be those things, I’m also a lot for things no one could even imagine. My family would be completely devastated if they knew the thought of suicide was even slipping into my mind. Of course, people always say “you should see a councillor and get some […]
On 14 May 2014, I died. This was my 9th attempt and first success. I didn’t want to come back. But, yet again, I was denied of what I wanted most of all: to be free of all the pain, suffering, bipolar/PTSD and abuse I’ve endured for over 30 years. People called me selfish. Maybe so, but when you’ve lost everything that mattered, everyone you loved, even though they didn’t love you, being abandoned, rejected, your brain fucking with you on a daily basis, and you fight every single day to get through it, death is the only way out. I’m done with shrinks, the […]
I guess I’m a walking irony, I have severe depression and social anxiety and you know what it was cause because I helped people and took on there problems but didn’t have anybody to talk to about my own. You know what’s even worse when I joined this site, I got locked out because I kept checking my page so much to see if anybody had bothered replying to me and I felt even more alone because of that, like even the website put there for people like me doesn’t want me. I’m that much of a screw oh that this site hates me too. […]
This is probably going to be long. I just needed somewhere to write out what has happened these last few years so I can get my thoughts in order. I’m sorry.
I first noticed that I was apathetic with my emotions when I was 10. I didn’t think much of it then – only wondered for a little while as to why I was different to the rest of my classmates. It never really bothered me much, that is, until I got to high school. I suppose that I should mention that I’m an introvert. I don’t have very many close friends, and none that I […]
I’ve already had mine kissed. I wish everyone who has scars know how it feels to have someone who loves you kiss your scars, and promising you with their lips, that they’ll never let you do it again.
I’m drowning in my own sadness and depression. Just when i think I might be getting better I get worse. It’s a constant cycle of feeling happy then utterly hopeless and wanting to die. I can’t break the pattern no matter what drugs the docs prescribe or what activities I used to enjoy. I can’t find a thing in my life to lift this depression. I’ve tried all the things from before but nothing helps. I’ve taken to constantly listening to music to try and help but every song no matter how happy it sounds makes me even sadder and more depressed. I can’t win […]
I want to die. All I can think about is that, and how I have no friends (save for a few I have online), how I have never had a boyfriend (except for an online one), how I won’t ever be able to make friends or get a boyfriend in real life, how I’ve been sitting around the house doing basically nothing ever since I dropped out of school in March, how I won’t be able to start some (online) college classes this semester, how my parents have forever been disappointed in me, how I can’t get a job because I can’t drive yet, how I feel completely unmotivated […]
I’ve been suffering pretty severe depression for roughly four and a half years now. Throughout this entire battle I’ve had with the snakes in my head, the demons in my personality, nothing has helped. I’ve been on different types of drugs, I’ve seen councilors, I’ve talked to friends and family in a search for hope and understanding – and I always end up back in this state of desperation. It’s reasonably well known that there are suicidal people who don’t actively want to die, they just want the pain to cease. The thing is, I actually want to die. I’ve had on and off feelings […]
No words can ever express THE FULL EXTENT of how fed up and done with this steaming pile of dogshit we call human society, on this rock, in this universe with these laws of physics, as I am. I’ve surpassed the thin boundaries of apathetic, I am a void with human form. The unbelievably idiotic things I hear people say and think on a regular basis make me want to use a metal baseball bat to smash their heads in. The gene pool is polluted by people who should’ve been strangled several times over already. Fuck they’re dumb as rocks.
Maintain, maintain, maintain, maintain, and maintain. […]
I question my existence every waking minute. It doesn’t matter if I’m awake or asleep, I live within nightmares whether lucid or subconsciously. I have tried everything to change my mind but there is nothing left for me here. I fear myself to be a burden to those whom I love and in my demise I feel as though I would free them of their constant angst due to the worry they possess for me. The problem is; I don’t want to die! But I am not living. This is not living. I am merely respiring, merely going through the motions of being alive. Yet […]