I have been growing my viking beard for a few months, everyone compliments me on it. I originally grew it out of depression but now I like it. So strange, I just wanted to look different, apart from the masses and now people look at me like i have courage or something, like i know something they don’t. Well I don’t. They think I’m happy and unique when really i am angry and depressed. I wanted to be left alone but now people want to talk to me. No one impressive talks to me. I am very dissatisfied with life. I feel like no one […]
Everyones depressed. Everobes hates their life Soooo much, yet they won’t do anything about it. They claim to know everything about anything to do with death. The symptoms on depression. E-v-e-r-y-tt-h-I-n-g. Yet they can’t get it through their thick skulls that guess what? People actually die. They kill themselves over things like that. And it’s not funny, or sonthong to claim to give a fuck about….sorry guys it had to be said
I found myself revamping my suicide note without realising it. I had written one in summer last year, but it was horrible; I couldnt translate how I was feeling properly, and also write it so my family could understand.
I had a best friend Katie, she was suicidal at one point and I thought she was just looking for attention. Im one of those horrible people who dont believe things until I experience it myself, we’ll call it a learning curve.
I was horrible to her, I always have been; people who love me have always been my outlets…
Its a shame though because I really love her. […]
I don’t want to die, but I don’t want to live either.
Maybe that’s not entirely true, sometimes I’d really like to die. Like the time I took twenty pills and stared up at the ceiling waiting for it all to be over. But something always pulls me back. Ten minutes into it, my little brother came in to comfort me. I had been upset after my mom had another one of her episodes and lashed out at me. He told me that she didn’t mean it and that he would be there for me. It was in that moment that I didn’t want to die […]
I’m 13 years old, turning 14 in March 13. I’m here again. Alone. I’ve been sexually abused by two family members and physically abused by almost every single person in my family. I’ve been beaten with objects. I can still taste the blood inside my mouth when it got busted and bruised. I’m insecure. I have cuts all over my legs and arms. And I have P.E too, we’re forced to wear shorts, I have to run everyday in the lockers and change as fast as possible making sure no one is able to see. I keep my razor inside my phone case, just in […]
Its another morning.
I awake. I sob. I’m awake. I’m still alive. I wish I wasn’t.
I suffer from dysthymia, a form of mild depression that is persistent. All I know is down, all I have ever known is down. I also suffer from Major Depression, episodes of extremely severe depression that last 1-12 months at a time. Yes, they put depression in my depression so I can be depressed while I’m depressed. This is called double depression. One of its features is being more hopeless than someone with one form or the other, another is that it is hard to treat.
I also have generalized anxiety. Tons of anxiety all […]
Dear word,
I know you don’t know me. And the words that I’m about to say may mean nothing to you and you just may not care. I am a female that goes by EmoCookie its an old nickname and I am 18 years old. I have depression. I see people to get help, but that doesn’t seem to be working but I will give it more time. I am an on and off cutter. I cry. I try to smile when I can. I’m failing school and I dont know what to do about that. I’m lost be on repair. My dad is […]
My life has always been messed up. The earliest memory I can remember was of my mum holding one of my arms and dragging my out the front door of my first home and my other hand reaching out for my dad who stood and watched. I was screaming and crying. I didn’t want to go.
I’ve lived in many homes since my mum and dad got divorced. And mum has had many boyfriends. One was Gavin who had a son. They were really nice at first but I got scared of Gavin. One day during one of Their arguments I was hungry so I […]
4 weeks ago I changed antidepressants from citalopram to sertraline. Since then I’ve been paranoid and have anxiety issues, which I never had before, and the depression comes in waves now. Some times I feel ok, and then i’ll plummet and wish I could just take the scalpel to my throat. I feel so alone. No one cares about me. I don’t blame them, I’m not likeable, very boring, hate going out, hide in my room, am short fat and ugly, a triple threat. It just seems pointless. If I’m to spend the rest of my life alone, what’s the point in living it? I […]
For almost a year i’ve been suffering from OCD. I’m depressed, numb and sometimes just thinking about ending it.
The only thing that have kept me from ending it was this one girl in my class that i recently learnt to talk to… We talked about random subjects together and just had a good time. Whenever i was feeling down, she talked to me and made me happy. Every time I would talk to her, my bath’s (normally about 45 minutes) would decrease to about 30 minutes. She’s the only thing that keeps me going. She makes me want to fight, to become normal. Our relationship […]
Well I don’tknow what to say or where to start, but I guess just letting it all out is a start, so here it goes. I’m a 22 year old female and at the age of 22 I never knew I would of felt the amount of pain as I have this past few years. Past few weeks all I been thinking about is sucide, why should I go on? I can barley handle the pain because of this depression its like a disease that will never go away from the feel of it. I been thinking of different ways to do it overdosing, jumping […]
I’m new to this website. As I was reading through some posts, I realized that many people are troubled just like me, and most have probably hid it from the surfaces of their lives and instead wrote it on here, anonymously. All I can say is that I am truly sorry for each and every one of those people. I can’t say that I know how you feel because every situation is different.
I’ve kept my story in the closet for three years now. No one has ever known what I went through. I’m not entirely sure I’m ready to come to terms with it all and admit everything that went […]
Hey everybody, I’m new here…..kind of. Anyways I felt like I wanted to share my story, but I have no idea where to start or how to start. So I’m just going to ramble on and on until I feel like it should end.
I guess I was always suicidal. I’ve always thought of suicide as a little girl and its almost an obsession now. I remember trying to commit suicide when I was six or seven, but not strong enough to push the steak knife into the skin of my neck. Such a weak little girl I was. Anyways about two years ago is when […]
IM A FUCKIN FAILURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
I have aspergers sydrome and i thought i would off myself before i reached 18 for many reasons invloling social life, future prospects and depression. I “practises” killing myself by starvation…i would not eat for a few days and that how i decided i would go. After around 24hours i lose the sense of hunger and my movements become sluggish, whether or not i can do it in the end i dont know like resisting tempation.
i didnt do it because i got into the second year of my college course, but i still have seveer depression. now i am saying to myself i will do […]
I’ve been on this site many times before…Reading this blog is like reading the Bible to me. It’s refreshing to be able to read all the honest feelings in these posts. I am not happy to read about how so many of us are suffering, but at the same time, it’s nice to know that I am not alone in how I feel at times…Well most of the time. I wish that I could accurately describe how fucked up my life is…It really is exceptionally miserable. I’ve spent the majority of my life with depression and anxiety…But I always had hope for the the future..Hope for […]
I’m fairly new to these kind of sites so i’m sorry if this post isn’t perfect, but I could do with some help..
Since about June 2012, I’ve been battling with depression, and not the stereotypical depression, real depression. The kind where you feel shitty for no reason sometimes, like there’s no escape, feeling so lonely when you’re in a world with 6billion people…
What caused it? Truthfully, a lot of things just fell down around me: exam stress, nasty rumours going around, the only girl I’ve loved doing unimaginably awful things and saying such nasty stuff to me (many will point at this, but it wasn’t the sole […]
I am 13. I don’t have a really sad story about being raped or having drug addict parents. which makes me feel like i honestly dont have a reason to feel depressed. but here i am. I dont know how it all started. but i remember a year ago when i started in a team for my favourite sport. i’m not going to say what it is because along with my name, it is very uncommon and i feel like that someone who knows me might read this. anyways, you might think, oh wow thats a really good thing! but only a few people did […]
Hello! They say writing and sharing your experiences can be therapeutic, and in my case that is especially true. So, today I thought I’d take a moment to sit down and have a little chat with all of you.
My story really begins about 8-9 months ago. I was going through a rough time, I had just found out I have a lump in my spine. In the past years I have been diagnosed with:
Reynauds Disease
Fibromyalgia
Osteoporosis (in my neck)
Osteoarthritis (neck, again)
Heart Arrhythmia
Severe Insomnia […]
I’ve been silently suffering for a while now. I have had thoughts about killing myself several times, but they mostly hit late at night, which is when i feel most alone. I’ve pushed everyone in my life out and i’ve secluded myself from a lot, but not on purpose, it just kind of happened. I’ve lost a lot of people, and i feel like if i just did it and wasn’t such a coward i’d be in a much better place. I’m afraid of doing it because i don’t know what happens next, but i’m sure whatever happens next after that, is a lot better […]