Tag:

Depressive Disorder

Suicide Pact was A Failure, Now I’m in a Mental Ward

by Pbsmurderer 1/28/2014

written by Pbsmurderer

I attempted suicide again this month. Well, attempted isn’t really the right word. I was going to join a Suicide Pact but to my surprise, someone contacted the authorities beforehand and stopped us. After taking any tests, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, Agoraphobia, Social Anxiety Disorder, and Insomnia. But hey, at least I got a new batch of pills. Man, the workers in the mental ward are true assholes, treating you like your crazy, it’s really annoying. Well, at least I was able to get out.

Wow, what a month. I attempted suicide twice, and I lost my job, what can I do now? […]

1/28/2014 20 comments

A waste…

by roseofsharon19 9/11/2013

written by roseofsharon19

I am a 20 year old female attending university within my home town. I honestly feel lost within my own life. I am a waste of space. I do not know how to cook, terrible at cleaning, and struggle to manage a workload in school that others would find easy. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and anxiety disorder. I was never social as a child; I can’t go up to someone and start a conversation. I had a happy childhood, up to a point. Our home has come under disrepair within the past decade or so. I love my parents, at least I […]

9/11/2013 1 comment

How I felt 3 days ago

by Shaynax 8/2/2013

written by Shaynax

Trying to kill myself was the best thing that couldâ€™ve happened. Because if I hadnâ€™t tried to and if I hadnâ€™t failed, I wouldnâ€™t feel the urge to change how I felt and I wouldnâ€™t have gone to Four Winds. It was tricky, I had just enough of the Nortatryptaline to go into coma but I just ended sleeping for a straight 48 hours. I then didnâ€™t leave my house for an entire week and was drinking so much, I decided physical pain would have been the answer to everything. I cut the word help into my arm and cried myself to sleep that night. […]

8/2/2013 1 comment

Stuck Has a New Meaning

by tranquilperplexity 7/13/2013

written by tranquilperplexity

In my life I’ve had several moments where I felt ‘stuck’ or ‘trapped.’ Â I wish that people truly understood the depth and complexity of those words to me. Â My life has had its challenges, but what upsets me the most is that I truly am privileged.

I have major depressive disorder, but I am privileged. Â I have a father that was a cheater in all three of his marriages and emotionally abusive towards me, but he is a Professor and exposed me to the world of learning and higher education. Â I also have a father that through his cheating contracted HIV, but thankfully my mother did […]

7/13/2013 2 comments

I’m back

by Rainbowhead 11/27/2012

written by Rainbowhead

I just spent 19 days inpatient and am likely going to go to partial next week. I have bipolar type 2 with psychosis. I was misdiagnosed as having major depressive disorder with generalized anxiety. I also have PTSD. Please, anyone who is considering suicide, get help. Get a diagnosis, get treatment. You are stronger than this.

11/27/2012 1 comment

my pathetic, lonely life. thus far.

by DarkStar 10/16/2012

written by DarkStar

This one’s pretty long, sorry if I bore anyone. I should preface by saying that I’ve been depressed for four years. I was formally diagnosed with major depressive disorder January of this year, but I knew long before. I’ve never had a true friend, anything even close to a relationship (been led on a few dozen times), and I feel alone constantly. Recently my diagnosis was changed to suggest the cause of my pain is ADD. I’m not sure if the doctors are right, but amphetamines are helping a bit lately. This is the story of the last eight months or so, from the first […]

10/16/2012 2 comments

My first time here

by will920 9/26/2012

written by will920

So this is my first time even talking about this. I thought opinions from people i dont know might help.
I have been stuggleing with what has been described as a manic depressive disorder. I dont know of its any different from anybody elses, but the easiest way to describe it is that i can be brought down by things simple as a 3 second memory. Ill randomly become depressed for different severeties and random amounts of time. It can be mintues to months.
Latley though just cant get through it […]

9/26/2012 1 comment

I have a Major Moral Delima

by jamaisvutoo 9/22/2012

written by jamaisvutoo

I have always believed that Suicide is a personal choice and that it should be a lawful and valid answer for any ADULT (sorry, there is SOOOOO much drama during the teen years that if legal EVERYONE would commit suicide) that is in so much physical or psychological pain that they just want out.

If you are in so much physical pain – from an illness, injury, birth defect, etc. – that day-to-day life is a struggle and you are in constant unbearable pain, I believe that if all else has failed and you CHOOSE suicide, then you should be supported in your decision.

If you are […]

9/22/2012 11 comments

I’m finally done. I just can’t stop the madness in my head. I tried all kids of meds. Zoloft, xanax, paxil, Prozac, etc. this list goes continues. Every shrink diagnoses me with the same thing, major depressive disorder and generalized and socialized anxiety. I think hospitalization would only out me in a worse mental state. Talking sometimes helps but mainly I can’t focus that long. Breathing exercises would be eat if I could take a deep breathe. Sure there are circumstances that depress me but there always is and always will be. It’s my own self, my own head. Nothing helps me. No one can help me. After more than 15 years, I’ve felt this way, I don’t have anymore in me. I’m not looking for sympathy or jokes or even asking the best way to go. I just needed to write it down. I do think about my family and the 2 friends that have stuck by me. I thrill of my 11 month niece that won’t know me her auntie. I don’t want anyone to find me. I will leave letters for those who meant the most and I will simply disappear for a stranger to find later.

by mlrobin 9/11/2012

written by mlrobin

9/11/2012 1 comment

Is it worth going on?

by burnedoutginger 8/29/2012

written by burnedoutginger

I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder two years ago. I took drugs and went through therapy, and I did end up feeling better. But for the past 6 months or so, when I’ve been alone with just myself, I’ve been incredibly suicidal. I can’t talk to anyone about it, because they’ll just put me back in the hospital, but I’veÂ beenÂ through all that, and obviously it’s not helping anymore, if it ever did at all. When I’m around other people, I’ll generally have a good time, but as soon as all distractions are gone, I’m back to suicide. I don’t have a difficult life, I’m […]

8/29/2012 4 comments

Been There, Tried That….

by kthxbai2u 7/28/2012

written by kthxbai2u

I did have a different title – which was funny – but I forgot. Oh well.

My name is “kthx” (for privacy reasons). I am a 26 year old Male, plagued with three conditions (that we know of so far) which are Major Depressive Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, and A.D.D. (ADHD minus the hyper component). I was diagnosed with the ADD and depression as a child. I have lived ever since then in a depressed state. I always have a low mood (dysthymia), and things never seem to work out for me.

I have been through so many psychiatrists and psychologists officesÂ throughoutÂ my life and not one of […]

7/28/2012 0 comment

don`t wanna kill her softly with my song….

by fulcanelli 7/28/2012

written by fulcanelli

I know everyone has different reasons for arriving at this site, though we all share the same goal. My reasons are mental health related at their core, I guess, and the fallout from the symtoms…
Major Depressive Disorder, a chronic case of ADHD that I discovered myself 10 years ago in my mid 20’s, and anxiety which amplifies my reactions to people who are I guess just naturally reacting to my conditions… a vicious, never ending cycle that brings me here. Sadness, loneliness, pain & the anger that comes with being misunderstood & having no one to talk to.
Suicide is something I began flirting […]

7/28/2012 1 comment

I’m back

by lostchild445 7/21/2012

written by lostchild445

Its been a long time. Â I thought i was getting better, but i was dead wrong. Problems i thought had disappeared had only gone into remission. Major Depressive Disorder, Self Injury, Eating Disorders, all the problems i have, all hitting me at once again. Fuck.

7/21/2012 2 comments

My inner termoil

by alonealways 7/11/2012

written by alonealways

Anxiety, depression, Bulimia Nervosa and cronically alone.

After seeking treatment for Comorbid major depressive disorder and Bulimia Nervosa I though I would change and consequently my life would change.Â Reality is a whole lot different. I constantly have suicidal thoughts, high levels on anxiety and extremely low moods.

I find my self in the grips of yet another bad Bulimia time.Â On a good night I eat dinner once and loose it once, on a bad night I might eat 3 and loose 3.Â I do it not to be thin but to ease the anxiety and stress and as an avenue for self harm.Â I am […]

7/11/2012 4 comments

We all know how this story is going to end. Always have.

by enjoytheraven 5/24/2012

written by enjoytheraven

I have major depressive disorder and social anxiety/borderline avoidant personality disorder.

I was going to go to group therapy. I never did.

I was seeing a counselor. I stopped going.

I take an anti-depressant. It helps a lot but not enough I guess. Less anxiety and less pain but that isnt enough.

I live a solitary life. I am like a hermit. I barely speak to people. I avoid women. Don’t make eye contact, speak as little as possible. If they seem to like me, become vaguely hostile…put up those old barriers. Whatever it takes. Because it hurts and they can hurt me more. But all I really want […]

5/24/2012 15 comments

Just 2 Tired

by Just2Tired 5/1/2012

written by Just2Tired

Well… Here I am at 25. More confused than when I was 14…. Lost for 11 years. Wandering, somewhere out there alone. In a world full of trauma and pain. Not understanding where I am going, or even what I want to do. My father who was my best friend died in an accident. A month before my birthday. Right before Father’s day… My mother met an addict and decided that she wanted a different life. So when she got out of jail, she moved out of state and gave her children up to be wards of the state…

The rest of my family disappeared as […]

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5/1/2012 4 comments

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