I destroyed my vocal chords screaming the other day. Never been this bad. I can’t even sing to make myself feel better, and it’s already been two days. Can’t talk, can’t yell at anyone, lol. Think I might of done permanent damage .
Tag:
done
Im done. I just dont have the courage to end it and it frustrates me. I am just numb to the world and every day that passes just makes me feel less human and more numb. I am lonely but seem stuck this way as i seem unable to connect to anyone even at the most basic level. Socializing seems so foreign, it feels fake. I am tired. I was raised catholic and any faith i had has long since eroded. I wish it were just this one thing but it is not. It is a million tiny little things that just tells me i […]
okay, so i was just writing a post that gave everyone all the information that could possibly need and then some about any reason I may have for feeling blue. I had to stop myself mid way because I realized it wasn’t even helping me out. I was boring myself! Instead, what I am going to try to do here is just blurt it all out. Say what I’m feeling, maybe add a reason or two, and then move on to the next whatever comes to mind. I’m hoping this does at least a little something for someone if not for me.
3………………3………………….2………………………………….2……………………………………2……………………………..1…………..GO!
worthless. I […]
Every day I go thru this. Even on this site, nobody cares, forever the invisible person, hearing his voice in my head. I am tired of bearing the unbearable alone in a triggering hell. I am tired b/c people’s casual judgment can’t begin to touch how bad the remains of what csa has done to me, a battering and torture of my mind heart body and spirit. They can judge thru these words not understanding the anguish I feel in my soul, how my brain can feel so scary, how noise batters me, how his horrible voice accosts me, how I have panic attacks in […]
I need to get some medicine drink a little and just pass the fuck out black out the world and escape I haven’t been able to sleep in awhile and I haven’t done this in ages I think it’s the best thing to do at the moment I need to escape leave my thoughts. Any suggestions?
Been depressed for years and i have a bad drink problem thats started affecting my health i have severe liver damage ive got a lot worse feeling low the last few months not because of my health problems im just not even interested in anything anymore in the past ive always talked my self out ended it all for what it would do to my parents but lately ive just thought if i do it and get it over and done with then its done. i cant imagine what im going to put my parents through if i carry on drinking and been honest i […]
i war with myself constantly, going from extreme highs to lowly lows. I don’t know what to do, I always over react and I always make mistakes, I’m like a sporadic pendulumI swing from doing what’s right and what’s wrong so quickly. my life’s a mess.in the long run I think I’m going to get a truck and I’m going to do some traveling probably go from one corner of the Americas to the other. and in the end of find a nice quiet and beautiful place then I will remove my stained from humanity. in the end I guess nothing was worth it, we […]
Less than a year ago, I had, of what I can say, the lowest point of my life. Every single night, tears were streaming down my face; it engraved canyons in my cheeks. Every single night, I look at the stars and wish everything would just come to an end. Every single night, I ask myself, “Is it wrong to enjoy what life can offer me? ”.
There were so many things I’ve been going through that I’ve kept to myself for so long because I couldn’t let it all out. I didn’t speak up and didn’t make a big deal out of it so […]
it’s my first post but i don’t know how to put my words in a sentence. I have lots of things that is hurting me from inside n outside. i kept all my problems to myself, Every things bad happens to me i feel like this is the end… i can’t take these are anymor I’m done and, when i talk to my self i say hey, u need to be strog enough to live but, right after that smt worse than last time happen and im just like WHY!?!?! What shoul i do? Im so weak now
i’m scared to do smt wrong ????
(sorry if my […]
Hi I’m a 25 years old living in England I’ve been Self-harming for the past 11 years and would love to stop I’ve tired everything to stop even getting a tat on my arm to but that did not even work I was wondering what have people done to stop self-harming thanks
I used to love you. But you fucking broke me. I can’t have one normal conversation with another human, I can’t smile. Can’t laugh! Because you broke me. You ****. I hope you rot and are miserable for eternities. I used to only be suicidal, now that’s changed into homicidal. I used to be sad, so sad. That’s gone now. I don’t feel anything, except ANGER now. Pure hatred. I think if it was my choice to let you live or die, i’d finally smile, watching you burn. I fall asleep thinking about, I dream about it. Dream of your death. I fantasize over it. […]
I’ve done the therapy. For years now. Off and on. I can’t help but feel like I’m abandoned every time the round of treatment ends. But I know why I am. Because I don’t respond to it. But it looks like I am.
I tell them everything they want to hear. Or what I think they want to hear.
Rate your mood? I’d give it an 8 out of 10 when really it’s never more than a 2.
Take your pills… great but they never do anything.
There was a time when I wanted help.
Not anymore.
I am new to the site as a member but I’ve read through many posts throughout all my dark times. This will be my first and only post. It is my way of saying good bye. I cannot handle the pain any more. Ever since I was 12 I’ve thought of suicide. Each year that goes by it gets stronger, darker, and harder to cope with. Now that I am almost finished with college, I have realized how unfit I am for this life. The stress, the expectations, I just can’t do it. I’m such a shitty waste of space and a burden to everyone […]
I am 45 years old; I gather that I have thought about ending my life since the age of about nine. Never mind that most “normal” kids never think about killing themselves ever. To ponder suicide on a regular basis since you were in grade school seems a burden that no God should place on a person.
I have no will to accomplish anything. I feel very little except disgust about myself. Counseling rarely helps; I am such a people-pleaser that I seek to say whatever I think will make my counselor feel he/she has done a good job for the day. That’s jacked up, I […]
I need to know if I should. I mean I know that everyone I know would be better off, logically this makes sense. I also know that just by asking I have my answer, but that’s not enough. I am, and have done, what most people would consider unforgiveable. I am not religious. I do believe in reincarnation and genuinly thinkin make a better go if it next time round. I think my eife, friends and family deserve to be able to live their lives without the hassle or having me in them. I especially believe my wife could find true happiness if I wasn’t […]
I’m so freaking done with life. What’s the point of staying here? I’m so sick and tired of hearing “God has a plan for you” the plan I want is to die right now. I can’t do this anymore.. No one cares..
Here I am- again. Oh woe.
…. You know, it isn’t even that I really want to die anymore, or that I don’t want to be here, or that I’m thoroughly sick of it all yet again. It isn’t that I’m done with life or trapped in despair or mired in the worry I like to pull from molehills; it isn’t anything, really.
I’m…. just kind of tired. At this point, after everything, it isn’t that living doesn’t seem at least a little worth it. It doesn’t seem impossible, hopeless, or crushing, it seems doable and enjoyable and maybe something that I could manage to be […]
It’s really hard to explain this to your parents, but imagine what would they feel about growing old when I leave them at the most challenging part of their lives. Perhaps they knew this when I was born (?). Seems like everything is obvious, yet not much that can be done. Things are so bad. What a life, I’m amazed I got dealt these cards.
Mama said to hold on to the most basic emotion, love
Love, failed me over and over as I bled from all the cuts,
Cuts, done by unseen sharps as she again let me down,
Down, further in hole than the last one,
I can not be undone, but I am broken,
And none see those hopeless moments
They see the iron-will in me and its all false
In the end it shows, they see as I rot
Can’t hold on for long, I tried
Play the song “When I’m gone” when I’m gone
There’s nothing interesting or worthwhile about my life. Heard the same old bullshit story over and over and I’m done. I really don’t care about the people who are my friends. Never had a real friend who understood me, and I’m way past trying to find one. Thanks to my childhood being raised by a clueless ***** mother who doesn’t know the first thing about seeing to a child’s healthy emotional/mental development, I don’t give a fuck about others. Whether or not I’m bored, I think about ending my life cause this one is just a waste of time.
Ppl always tell you you shouldn’t kill […]