I try to get over my depression and I feel better for some days but I go all over again from the beginning . I’m tired of life and I decided to suicide . I know this will be hard for my family and I will miss my sister so much because she is life for me and mom was always a perfect mother for us and my dad and my brother are my love . but sometimes we need to take hard decisions because I can’t stay in this depression
Tag:
family
I’m the reason why my parents may get a divorce soon.. the only thing that’s holding this family together is my soon to be seven year old brother. Listen, I’m not overreacting or anything when I say this, my family hates me. Because I’m pretty sure that most families don’t call their daughters/sons: tramps, sl*ts, wh**es, and other things like that…
When I was in the eighth grade I was put into an actual public school; I thought everything would turn out alright. I thought everything would go the way I wanted it to. I was wrong. Not even a month of school had passed before […]
Found out yesterday my father is leaving my mother (with three children). He fell in love with a co-worker half his age, a few years older than me. He just took his clothes and left without telling his children. He want going to tell mom either. My mom finally confronted him….And asked him if what she silently hoping want true was real. He admitted top being in love with someone else and just left. This just happened. Happy 2015. My dad isn’t an abusive alcoholic junkie asshole. He had his problems sure like we all do but […]
I am going to kill myself soon. I have a question, however? Would it be better to delete my social media accounts completely before I commit the deed, or should I leave some of them for my family to do with as they please? (I also kind of wanted to keep my writing blog up as some sort of…I don’t know, testament to how much I loved creative writing.)
So, would it better to wholly erase my online identity–photos, videos, etc.? Would that lessen my family’s pain, since they would have less reminders of me after I die? Or would it better to let them decide […]
I am approaching 30 and I have never been in a relationship.
When I was 18 I had my first major crush on this girl in college (I am also a girl). We had been close friends (I think) for about half a year before she started to really distance herself from me. She might have sensed my crush and got freaked out. Then one day she told me she had a boyfriend. Somehow I never knew it before (I was so stupid) and I made comments about her boyfriend out of jealousy. She was enraged and called me a freak and a predator before completely […]
I am writing this, mainly to get things out. I have nobody to talk to, and I want to explain my situation before I go.
When I was in primary school, life was okay, how can’t it be when your so young? I was very intelligent, a good kid, never really got into any trouble, and had some friends. When I was 10, I lost my father to a heart attack. This hugely affected my family, which already wasn’t a big family. Each day just walking around the house, I would randomly find my mum crying.
As I was so young, I managed to get past this, […]
going to fail A-levels –> have no opions if i cant get to uni –> dont have a passion to take as a degree –> my two ‘bestfriends’ are now in smitten ‘grown up’ relationships and have abanoned me –> my mum is so depressed she wont accept that i also have depression–> i have so many scars on my body that i will forever be wearing jumpers –> my savings are being used to keep the family house from repossession –>i dont have the motivation to try anymore –> no motivation to live, no motivation to die.
They really do. They hurt so much that sometimes I really wish I could be all alone in this world. I wish I had no family or friends, that I could live entirely on my own. And sometimes I envision a future where that’s how I really live. Phone calls to my parents, occasionally, gifts mailed out during the holidays to some of my relatives, but nothing more than those few interactions. Nothing face-to-face or substantial. The only downside to this grand future is that I am inherently extroverted, and isolation feeds my depression and anxiety and ultimately makes me feel worse. I need people […]
Change is the one thing constant.
Do not depend on humans. Do not trust humans. We are all capable of manipulation of words. Nope nope.
Steel your heart. Steel your soul. Let no one come near. You’re on your own kid.
Build up walls, like others have. Be independent. No one is as foolish as you. It’s a eat-or-be-eaten world. No one will trust you the way you blindly do.
Curl up and put your defenses well. Grow up and protect yourself. Stop allowing others, be it friends or family, to hurt you like that.
Protect. Hide. Move on.
You have chosen selectively. Cause everything in life is by your own […]
Life is empty & meaningless, without any/no purpose, Life is boring, empty! There is no meaning of life! fuck life, fuck reality !
by niki
written by niki
Life is empty & meaningless, without any/no purpose, Life is boring, empty! There is no meaning of life! fuck life, fuck reality !
The more I grow up & learn after all these 32 years of my life, sadly, the more I feel hopeless especially for humanity / our humans species!
MAJORITY of people / humans beings / humanity are so damn shallow, superficial, vain, ignorant, stupid, fake, dirty, liars, etc etc.
I used to have so much HOPE for humanity , but now the hope is dwindling until it’s almost none !!
MOST people are sadly only concerned with vain, shallow, mundane “daily-life” & little […]
I don’t know when my father will ever look me in the eyes or even look at me. He’s always breaking, throwing, and verbally abusing me at the point where I decided to tie a noose and wrap it around my neck in my basement. I was scared of how it might feel and if it would’ve hurt, but you can already guess what I did… as I’m hanging and swinging around I couldn’t help and notice the pressure building up on my face. I felt as if my face was burning and ripping apart and my ears felt as if they were being pulled […]
I’m sick of my life… It’s so boring… all magic that existed when I was a kid has now gone… magic turned into cynicism… society sucks… people just want what’s good for themselves, don’t care about others…
I’m a 30 year-old man living in Montréal, Québec, Canada…
I feel like my life means nothing, that I am not important to anyone. Last year, I stopped talking to most of my family because I was sick of being the last one of the family and being treated like I’m the last one in the family, even though I’m fuc***g 30 years old. I tend too much to rely on […]
Christmas without you is hell…..we never had family to have over, or the money to have the “average” Christmas……but I miss going out of my way to get you a lot of nice gifts, because I enjoyed seeing you smile. And it always made your worthless scumbag of a husband angry bc the only reason why he even got that $10 gift card is bc you made me get him something…..a pile of shit in a box crossed my mind a few times……as crappy of a mother as you were, I always loved you with all my heart. You were my bestfriend. I knew you […]
There’s nothing like Christmas to remind me of how little people care anymore. I got no cards or gifts from anyone other than my aunt, whilst everyone else had friends who bought them presents and visited them over the holiday. The friends of my family don’t mention and ignore me completely. For years I’ve suffered with mental illness and the only thing that was keeping me here was my family because I felt they cared and I didn’t want to hurt them with my suicide. Well I don’t have to worry about that anymore, so within the next few days I will make my suicide […]
I will be 50 not long from now. I have lived an outwardly full and rich life. People look up to me apparently and i am somehow respected. The truth is i have drifted through life with much luck and relative ease. I have been loved many times but have never loved until recently. And my immaturity in that caused it to fail anyway. The bottom line is that i see little point in going on. This world and this life just has no relevance to me, it is pointless. A few weeks ago I made an attempt to end it by downing a bunch […]
at least thats how i feel, this is probably selfish, if not mean of me to even think, but hes wrong. everything is always worse to begin with but it can get better. if he isnt willing to get help hes gonna end up putting a weight 10x the one hes scared of on everyone’s shoulders. he won’t get better till he gets help. and until then hes a corpse waiting to happen. i need him to get help. i had to do it when i felt like i couldn’t. he’ll always feel like he can’t until he does. once he does he’ll see the need to. his family can’t feel the weight yet but i can. […]
The absolute gall of my family members is atrocious. They berate me for everything I do (of which I do very little since I try to mind my on bloody business).
I went through absolute mental hell this year for my final year at uni, for some effed up reason, I managed to pass (seriously have no idea how), so imagine my utter disbelief when I get my uni assessment marks in the post and find out I passed everything, I was on the verge of disbelief, sorrow, joy and all other kinds of bewilderment but overall was generally approving of the situation. My ass hat family […]
I don’t know how much longer I can take this. I’m trying to say no but the blade keeps calling. I hate it! I hate me, I hate my sexuality, I hate the names, the looks, the comments at school, I hate the preppy bitches who get their pleasure from my pain, I hate this!!!! I can’t take much more, one month clean and I’m struggling, Mary moved on, I’m lost, I’ve got 100lbs of pressure on me to be perfect. I’m trying but I don’t know how much longer I can take this. I don’t have any more distractions. What do I do? Who […]
and i don’t know why. my boyfriend is great, I have a decent job and family, and I just feel worthless and want to die again what’s the point
I don’t think there is anyone in the world who could really screw up their life like I did.
by Paranoid guy
written by Paranoid guy
So this is my second post here. Could be my last. My previous post I mentioned how I said something dumb to my friends whilst I was high n drugged. It sounded gay I know they told other people about it. For the last two months this has been affected me. I been ashamed to go to gym, couldn’t function at work. My two friends which I normally hang out with would call me to meet on weekends but I would make excuses until two nights ago. They messaged me saying that they are going out to dance n are going to meet other […]