I am 17 and 6 weeks pregnant and want to die! I am so stupid I’m a runaway for almost a year and i got pregnant my parents lost there rights and i can’t get medical unless i go to a foster home I will never go back! i am stuck between 2 possible fathers and I Have feelings for both but at some point they are both assholes I am looking into ways to end mine and my baby’s life!
Tag:
Feelings
I haven’t been on here for a long time because I really needed sometime to think. Thank you for all your comments they were very inspiring and helpful. It seems like everyone on here could be my family even if my family doesn’t want me, I see that. But now I have something popping up and I don’t know how to deal with it. I have had abusive boyfriends, cheating boyfriends, ‘use and go’ boyfriends, and just to sum it all up ‘BAD BOYFRIENDS’. It’s my fault for having boyfriends at a young age, but that is what i turned to for comfort, boys. I […]
Stay awake you’ll be supprised.
At the beauty of the butterflies
They fly so high oh they have soared,
they know the pain you’ve endured,
they will never leave your plight,
scarlet wings look so bright,
leave back the nights of flooded tears,
and wake up without that frown.
The moonlight shines away your fears,
as the butterflies wipe away your tears,
so tonight when you start to cry,
remember the cutters lullaby:
hushabye baby you won’t be dead,
you have a pulse though your pillow is red.
your family hates you though your friends wont let you bleed,
just throw away that knife,
that’s all you need to do.
rockabye baby broken and scared,
 you know life won’t always be this hard,
time […]
Life what the f*ck is it about cause I truly don’t know anymore. I mean nothing makes sense anymore. People tell you bad situations don’t last long but I would like to challenge that theory. Happiness doesn’t last long so if you ever achieve it cherish it because it’s temporary. However, misery can last a life time. I’m living proof of that I know I’m only 19 but I’ve been miserable for the majority of my life. And right now I’m just exhausted. My life has no meaning to me anymore. I have to be the loneliest teenager in the world. You know people think […]
Like the song I see many people on this site trying to do that, promising all these things and getting people to hold on, like with anyone’s post about peoples problems and feelings it seems everyone or many people can offer advice, but isn’t offering people false advise and false dreams also an act of cruelty it is with this in mind I have not made as many positive comments that I could of, but after all the FAQ for this site tells us that this is not a place to look for salvation and to expect to be saved it is a simple place […]
If I were to destroy myself today, you wouldnt know or care. If you are going to destroy yourself do it in your honor. Not anyone elses. Maybe if I thought you cared I would be more inclined to destroy myself in your honor.
Ever despise someone so much you’re willing to commit the murder of self right in front of them… I used to say you can only hate someone you love so hate does not apply here. One may be feeling feelings undescribable, far from hate. These feelings affect self directly, that’s how soul deep the wounds are.
See the thing is one cannot lose […]
It’s been quite a long time since I’ve been on here,
Life still continues to pass me by. I met a girl who I have been involved with for around 9 months now.
I have learnt a lot about her.. Heck I even love her. I didn’t think I would meet anyone again at least not after the relationship I was in prior..
She’s changed from the girl I originally met back in December. She isn’t the girl I fell in love with..
She dismisses my feelings like they are just disposable. She’s sent my heart into a deep abyss, of darkness, anger and hate.
I have so much uncertainty […]
Her story
Why wont he just come over. I thought in my head. WHY! WHY! WHY! The blood that keep dripping from my arm wouldn’t stop. In the back ground the song Easy by Rascal Flatts was on. I looked at the clock and seen it was 10 o’clock. I dropped to the groundn and started pulling on my hair, screaming and balling my eyes out. I am curled up into a ball not being able to move..
“I hate you!â€
“ I know I’m sorry.â€
“You don’t know mom! You are putting me in her just like a animal!â€
“I’m trying to help you!â€
Then the door slammed open. […]
hello. it has been so long since i have even been one here. since april actually. but i decided to come back on.
i feel done with life. im not living anymore. im just the walking dead, like a zombie. literally. i cant concentrate on anything. and ill probably be made to go to rehab soon because i couldnt stop smoking weed. well i dont really care. im planning on killing myself before that happens. i know for a fact that i can never be happy again. thats just never gonna happen. im just completely done. i dont even want to be around my best […]
i shouldnt feel this way. i got rid of all those feelings when i left my old school. i have new friends, a new identity, a new school and a fresh start.  then why do i still feel like this. I just float through life everyday, a lifeless burden to myself.  I hate everything that i am, i hate everything that i do, have done and probably will do. i walk around school with this label “smiler” because im always smiling!
“hey smiler!” “right smiler!” dont they know its all a cover? a front if you will? Im alone, scared, cutting and dying inside. I respect myself […]
Hello.
There are a few background things you might want to know. Firstly, I’m a clinical psychopath. This doesn’t make me a killer or a psycho, although it is generally a daily struggle to keep from being either. To me, the world is black and white; there exists, for me at least, no shades of gray. My parents have known about my condition and have actually by and large done an excellent job of raising me. I come from a privileged family and have had everything I have needed provided for me, within reason. I’ve worked to secure that which would not be provided, namely the […]
Yesterday I got into a very suicidal mood which is totally isn’t me, or so I thought. I laid in bed all day and would have rather been dead than have done anything else. I’ve been depressed for the past few months after my mom cheated on my dad and they’re now going through a nasty divorce. I don’t talk to my mom anymore even though we still live in the same house. I feel really alone and like no one understands. I’m 14, I have a whole life ahead of me and I already want to die? It just doesn’t seem right. I want […]
Just a shitty day… or a couple.
A day like today where I wake up feeling okay, and then I start thinking about all the things I’ve ever done wrong. And then I start thinking about how I’m a shitty person. And then, on top of that, I feel like I have zero things to offer. I try so fucking hard to be good at things, at art, at programming… I’m in college, getting decent grades and busting my ass… But I hate everything I’ve ever done. I’ve never accomplished anything and I feel worthless. I’m a huge sagging disappointment to myself. I feel ugly; I […]
I was doing ok for a while….busy, had an relatively active social life, pursuing my dream (acting)….but now, seems as though things have come full stop. I hate it!!! Starting to think those dark thoughts again….starting to wonder if it’s really worth it. Hate my job!!! Hate my life!!! Hate being alone. Sure, I have my family (minus my Dad who passed away in Feb), but I really don’t want to burden them. This is my ordeal. I think I need to keep busy, it’s only when I’m busy that I don’t have a chance to think. Sitting and thinking is death. Thinking about my […]
I guess I should start with a statement of “I know that I”m a really lucky person, and life, while not perfect, had been nice to me.” I am born in a really developed country, and have so many benefits that many other countries doesn’t have. I am gifted and loved by god in many ways (learned how to read a language through watching TV, drawings that had won numerous awards and got me a 60,000 scholarship money, performed dance for the Winter Olympics, top three in my school, an hourglass figure, decent face, and healthy body with no mutations…etc.) But I don’t see a […]
This was from my journal i cut out alot of it. I apologize in advance if you think im just crying out.
why am i not good enough for you momma? why do i feel unloved by you? why do i feel like a pile of **** when we talk momma? momma why have you hurt me enough to lead to trying to kill myself? please momma i need answers for my feelings. i want you to love me momma. why do i have all these scars momma? why do i feel empty when i hug you? momma your son loves you and does all he can […]
Have you ever felt like u can’t breath, dying to catch a breath
your chest is about to explode,
can’t even think ,
u feel so extremely sad but you can’t cry, like you just wanna scream.
A battle, a fight, another day. Every morning I wake up and the first thing I do is check to see if I still remember how to smile, I’m not sure when it happened but piece by piece my emotions were shattered and I slowly started faking them to get by.
I guess it did have a beginning. I once had a dream, a direction in which to aim for and look forward to, but it fell to pieces and went from being a realistic future to a childish night time fantasy. I tried to fix it, I tried to create a new dream, but every […]
I’m Going through a divorce with my wife of 7 years. I recently started getting these feelings of regret and how I treated her. I am trying to get her back but it seems like she has moved on with her life already. I am so hurt and sad inside. I just want my family back. Idon’t want to live without my family together. I don’t feel the live from her anymore. We havetwo small children and it breaks my heart to see them going through this. I just want to give up. I can’t cook or clean or have no energy for theme I […]
Another new day, to some there is so much hope, so much promise. I envy those who have so much feeling. To me, there is nothing, it is all just empty and numb. Do these people not realize that life is just a rat race? Nothing more and nothing less, pretty cut and dry. People say it’s the little things in life that make it worth living. What happens when you see past that though? When the little things no longer offer a shred of happiness? Sometimes I fool myself into thinking that I deserve these feelings of hope, and happiness. However, it’s nothing more […]