My dad is getting married soon. He wants me to call his fiancée my mother. I can’t do that! It wouldn’t feel right, and she’s not. I like her, don’t get me wrong. Her psychotic Husband who she ran away from because of abuse is making up shit stories to make her feel guilty and get under her skin. She needs to press charges and get custody papers over the kids before he can but she’s not doing anything. I’m stuck in the middle too, in everyone’s way. No one knows what to do with me. My grandparents don’t want me home alone even with […]
dont know how to start this so here we go:
(sory for spelling/grammar. english isnt my best language)
IM tired of living. dont know what to do anymore
it just feels like i shouldnt exist.
nobody likes me.
it feels like im a burden to my family.
i cant do fucking anything right
im a failure
(do have a couple of friends i met trough WOW. but havent met them IRL)
every night i pray to god(if he exist) that i dont want to wake up anymore as its pointless
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why cant i feel happy?
why cant i have friends?
why cant i have a girlfriend?
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why cant i simply wake up in the morning and not feel […]
DON’T YOU DARE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJxgrSCZJ1s
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother, father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them anyways.†They will die. Their hearts will […]
Okay, so nearly six months ago, I was extremely lucky to find an awesome girlfriend. She’s beautiful, smart, funny, caring, the lot. But, she has a few major shortfalls. One: she can’t deal with my depression or bi-polar very well at all. Two: she shuts down when I try to talk to her (I.E. she tries incredibly hard to either swap topic or turn it into something else) and three: she doesn’t like the fact that I smoke (she fucking hates it more than I hate me).
Anyways, I very rarely see her these days because her schoolwork is absolutely ridiculous. She’s only in year […]
2 weeks ago I told my sister I don’t like boys and that I kind of like girls she said that it’s an abomination to like the same gender and it isn’t ‘natural’ and said she was against it and asked why would I even like girls and said if I were to die today I would most likely go to hell (she’s Christian) she said I need to go to church (I’m not that religious) she also said if I were to tell my dad that I like girls he would most likely stop talking to me he said he’d rather his daughter be […]
I’ve been up all night thinking….is today the day? Tomorrow? Tuesday? …seconds keep turning into minutes that keep turning into hours that keep turning into days that keep turning into weeks that keep turning into months that keep turning into years….Life keeps going….Its unforgiving…you miss the bus you miss the bus there is no catching it….I keep lingering and festering like an open wound exposed to germs … I hate that the sun rises signaling the end of yesterday and the beginning of today….I fucking hate that today is the future that seemed so promising 5 years ago…I turn 22 next month on the 5th […]
Everywhere I go, every place I look, I see people. I see love; I see happiness. I see what could be best described as a form of ignorant euphoria. Guys strut through the malls with their girlfriends, people just sort of hang out around places. Fuck. I don’t know. I don’t think I’ll ever know. What I do know is that I am feeling a sort of pain that cannot be rectified, minimised, or mitigated, due to its constant presence.
I will never experience love beyond that of my few friends, or that of my parents.
To be perfectly honest, I’m tired of my parents, particularly my […]
I cant even relate to the songs,I get so jealous when I hear about girls crying over there boyfriend leaving the, or moving away
At this time of night all I can think about is I don’t fit in with this family. My dad got this girlfriend and she has three kids. I’m 21 and they rang from 10 to 12. I get I have to grow up but dam they talk me into these “family” trips. I am not the family type. I love my family but I can’t do the happy family crap. My family if broken and I am trying to keep the little family I have together.I cry a lot more then I use to and my friends have talked to me about how scared […]
Honestly, I’m scared. I’m scared of everything because since March I have been trying to find ways to get by. I’ve used every goddamn coping skill you could think of. All of them and sure they relieve how I feel but it doesnt change it in the long run. I was stupid when I tried to die. I was supposed to jump. That was my plan initially, but I got fucking scared of being stopped, being seen, so I found an alternative. I should’ve known it wouldn’t work. I should’ve thought of what would happen afterwards. I admit since going to the hospital I enjoy […]
My names Jillian, i’m 15 years old, and here’s my story, i decided to share the truth.
My first school ever was Green Way Elementary, the first day of school was OK, until i started showing up at school looking all gross and ugly… It’s because when i was younger i lived with my parents, but then they split up because things weren’t working out for them, i seen them fight all the time, i stayed with my dad for a bit because my mom moved away with her girlfriend, while i was staying with my dad he liked to have friends over and drink […]
I won’t say my name but this is my story :
im 18 years old and ive always been uncertain of where my life’s going to take me .i never was the smartest in school and I wished there was around it .ive struggled all through out  my high school years.Anyways I’m approaching my señor year  and my girlfriend just left me .the thing is is that  right around when I met her last year I was in a dark time .i rarely came to school until I met her .i felt as if a weight had finally been lifted off my shoulders like I saw […]
im a boy and my girlfriend is my blade
She(my blade) makes me forget all the pain i have
She understands me
and when i cut
it brings smile on my face
so some guy  told me to put my story up here and wait for reactions on it before i do anything.
why not.
here’s my fucked story:
i am Jeroen Steeman. i am currently 17 years old, and i live in a small village in the netherlands. my life is garbage.
i used to have a happy life tough. lots of friends i hung out with. two awesome older brothers. a happy mom and dad. then my mother got multiple scerose (that’s the dutch name for it anyway) and lost her shit. all the joy that once exsisted in our family life just got destroyed. both my brothers moved […]
Every day I wake up thinking that this day will better than the last, but it doesn’t work that way. Every day is the same crap. Hoping that someone will hire me, but it doesn’t work like that in today’s world. You have to wait and wait and wait hoping for someone to hire when you know they won’t. I have always wondered why interviewers want a hand shake after an interview. They always say they will give a call when they really don’t. To me right there, that is backstabbing. They always act so happy to see you, but never call if you have […]
It’s my first post here, I must admit that I don’t know why should I bother doing this given that nobody gives a fuck what I do. I want to fall asleep and never wake up, I’m one of the worst persons that ever lived, I’ve made a lot of people suffer and most of them hate me. I think I shouldn’t be alive, that way the world would be a much better place, I can’t think why I could make the difference here, nobody will miss me. I’m that guy that walks alone with his head down, who people never talk to, I don’t […]
Everyone has to die one day, then why should wait for your death. It is better to take your life by your own way, a less painful death. Why should wait for some miserable disease like cancer. And most importantly if you are so hopeless that you don’t even want to wake in the morning. You wish that you never been born at first place. You don’t have a single person in your life to trust, to share your pain. When you are back stab by your best friend, cheated by your girlfriend, watching your father died with cancer. When the nightmares don’ let you […]
So the other day I was thinking about hanging it up and calling it quits, my life is complicated. I’m young but I feel like I lived life before if that makes sense? But anyway tied the belt around my neck and put it in a knot twice and was about to hang it up in my room, I tested it to see if it would hold my weight it did, and just as soon as I was about to give it another try my cat wonders in my room and starts purring and I put the belt down and started playing with my cat […]
I have anxiety, stress. When I wake up everyday I am in a state of panic. It takes about 30 mins of meditation to slow to heart rate from about 130 down to 70 beats per minute. My girlfriend says I shout in my sleep sometimes. After I slow my heart I can think straight again. But it takes about another hour before I can actually eat anything. So I get up every day around 6.
I can feel my heart all the time. When someone says something to me, I can actually feel how my body has reacted to it in my pulse and in […]
My dad hung himself on March 18th, 2013. Actually it could have been the 19th no one is exactly sure. It was my spring break and I was at the beach with a few of my friends and my girlfriend. I didn’t find out til that Thursday which I think was the 21st. My phone had been dead for a day or two and I didn’t bother to charge it, I guess I didn’t think anything important was going to happen. I finally charged and turned off my phone and saw that I had received a text from my rabbi and a woman in my […]