Keep fighting the good fight and never give up hope everyone. You are all loved and such amazing human beings. 🙂
I lost my job of almost twenty years today. I don’t have a degree, any skills, a really low IQ, and health problems. I made a pact with myself a long time ago that if this happened, it would be the last straw. I would need to stop being a baby and take my own life. People have been reaching out to me lately, but good people never consider maybe this person had plenty of chances and fucked them all up. Maybe it’s time to admit that I’m a mistake and stop burdening the world. Those people will get over it if I go. They’ll […]
Today at work I started to really feel bottomless sad, and the desire to end my life became once again overwhelming. But because of that recent lovely moment with my son, I actually had enough sense to not let myself sink further, but call my psychologist. Quite by miracle I got an appointment that very afternoon, due to a last minute cancellation. Usually the wait list is weeks long, unless it’s an absolute emergency. I take that as a good omen. And she is wonderful. I’ve been seeing her for years now, and she’s one of the major reasons I’m still alive.
Im just in my […]
I don’t think I can be saved. I’m seriously considering murdering my great-grandmother since I feel her death would be merciful for the entire family… I know killing an old lady of 103 with severe dementia is morally questionable but I know I’m immoral. I mean I think Earth will be better off without humans and would even nuke Earth if I could. Sorry animals but it’s for the greater good.
Hey guys. I am realizing something here. I have to move on. I have a picture with myself since I was 8 years old. I look at that picture and imagine what he wanted. He was a good kind child. His parents gave him the best they had. He had computer and a shelter+ food. Some of us don’t have this, some of us are paralyzed, having serious medical problems and the list can continue. The divorce of my parents and my introverted nature shattered my world, and the dissapointments with my exes. But still, like Salt said, I am good looking and smart. I […]
I stoped hanging out with my bestie and going out or even doing the fun things i use to do i dont like to go out i feel i been keeping to my self i hate feeling sad ugly fat im depressed and i will see doc soon i hope i can get better i always say im ok to not worry those who love me and see the good in me but im feel sad im sorry im not best at typing i do have a learning disabilty and dislexia hope ur day night is a good one its damn in morning and still […]
Hello loves 🙂 So I haven’t been feeling exactly chipper lately, and I think I’ve found something helpful.
You can go somewhere you think no one will hear you, or you can just stay in your house. Grab your pillow if you want to try and muffle the sound- but I recommend just letting it out.
Now, take a deep breath (haha see what I did there) and just scream your freaking head off.
Now I don’t mean a half assed yell- I mean a fucking battlecry against everything you’ve ever faced as a challenge or a foe.
Just a suggestion
its been a while since I’ve posted on SP mainly because I’ve been pretty happy lately. About 2 months ago I had a big fight with my mom and I told her to shove it and that I would rather live in my car than live with her so that’s what I did. Yeah I had the balls to do it so I did I slept in my car for 2 weeks and I was extremely bored but happier than I was at home and then I told my ex girlfriend and her parents took me in because they always liked me only one was […]
Hazy, remember when you said I should die my hair pink?? Well this happened tonight and I LOVE it. It’s not pink but it is so me! I actually feel really good! Thank you for being such a good person 🙂 you really do make a difference. Now I am sitting back and waiting on the backlash.
Do watching YouTube videos make you happier or more depressed? Â When I watch these videos (not celebrities, mind you) but of “ordinary” people, I see so much talent- people who can sing, people who can dance, draw, play musical instruments, rap, beat-box, heck even people who speak well or people who know how to put on make-up to make themselves look like superstars (all those tutorials)! Â Maybe I should stop watching shows like American Idol and X-Factor…
When I look at myself, I don’t feel like I’m good at anything. Â I don’t have any talent. Â Ok, so I am relatively intelligent and I do have a […]
Cause I’m struggling with that right now. I read your stories on SP, and I think of how much I wish I could take your pain and suffering from you. How you all seem like such nice souls, and how you don’t deserve to suffer like you do.
But someone like me… I can’t help if I don’t deserve to kill myself and suffer whatever might come after. I have so much, and although I live alone and only see my family once or twice I year, they help my financially and I don’t have to worry about that too much.
Despite that however… I wish I […]
All the memories just replay in my head over and over. The good ones make me think how can this possibly be happening when things were so good? And the bad ones make me wonder what I did wrong and think of a million other ways I could have done things differently. Just over and over and over.
The only time I get away is if my sleeping pills work or I’m asleep. I feel like if I had the access and knowledge I would become an addict to something because I can’t imagine living a life being haunted by memories. How am I supposed to […]
Any kno some good shows or movies to watch i like that they made a halloween myers dont come out till 2016 realy that far away dramma horror i like wbu do and do any of u skype mic and chill
Hey everybody : I know its been a while since I last posted I just thought I’d post this. I was in the shower earlier this morning when I realized That I haven’t self harmed myself in a little over two months. I noticed it when I was feeling my hip bones this morning and noticed one of my major scars healed almost completely. Though my appetite is still shitty ( due to finals coming up next week) . My mood has been getting better which is a good thing at least. 🙂
All my life u drank i wished one day u would give it up but i doubt it i thought that when u had to go to hospital for surgery that u might of stoped u did good for few weeks and then u drank i wish i was born with powers i would make booz disapear
I feel i dont deserve friends i dont have many but very few kno my wrongs and still speak to me the one i hurt most is done with me we dont even speak i think of __ alot i miss the good times i suck
life comes so easy to so many people. decent people around them. decent grades at school. decent personality. decent appearance.
thats all i really wanted. an average, decent life. i could live with that. but not this life where everything is a struggle.
things do work out better for some. dont tell me nothing good comes easy. the only good that comes easy for me is these suicidal thoughts and plans because they are my only escape from this hell life.
i am back to lying in bed all day staring at the walls falling in and out of sleep. it makes sense that this is how it […]
I know it isn’t healthy but I self medicate with alcohol to deal with my depression. Â Everybody thinks it’s a good thing that I drink a lot “Oh there he goes again at the bar! What a cool guy” or “Wish I could drink all the time like he does”. Â Going to the bar is comforting. Â I really like to see all the different people hanging out enjoying themselves. Â I almost always go alone, so the staff there kinda started to talk to me and I’m pretty good friends with them now I guess. Â But they aren’t really friends per se, just loose acquaintances I […]
Hello everyone! I hope your Sunday I’d going well. I just wanted to say that if your day isn’t going great, then talk to someone. It doesn’t even have to be about what’s getting you down, just talk to someone who makes you happy. I find that there are certain people who just cheer me up just by being them. If you know of a person like that, I encourage you to talk to them. And if for any reason you don’t have a person like that, talk to me! My email is in my bio description thingamadoohickey. I’ll talk to you (:
I know this […]
Presuming, as I do, that my hopes for conventional happiness are completely fucked…….what now?
Suppose I’d live an average western lifespan – another 50 years or so. 2065. By then the world should be well on it’s way to collapse. Drought, famine, fire, flood, war, all that fun stuff. Seemingly our little pockets of prosperity will be last to fall. My corner of the world may hold out longest, sinking the boats of refugees fleeing continental chaos, while we continue to extract foreign resources at gunpoint. So this bubble of decadence may well outlive me.
But I doubt it’ll be the same country then. We’re already slashing […]