I think about it all the fucking time. It would be easy to end the pain, suffering, and self hate that I feel daily. No more depression. No more cutting. Just ignorant bliss. I don’t know what will happen but I do know it would be better than the misery I live now. I can’t live with myself. I am “living” in a constant hell and it’s killing me; it’s actually slowly driving me insane. So the question is how will I do it? There are so many different options; hanging, suffocation, drowning, slitting my wrists, overdose, jumping, electrocution and so much more. I’ve written […]
I just hope you still love me
After all of the catastrophe
We were once companions, I believe
I never thought I would cause you to grieve
I miss you, and I love you
I just hope you love me too
I remember the mornings you came […]
I want to get out of all this pain… But for some reason i still hang on some hope and have been here longer than i thought. I will go soon… Could b tomorrow, next week, a month… Idk. Why do i still hold hope even though i know things (health) wont get better and i cant live my life like this. I had a great ride, and whats so wrong about ending it and not living through a painful life? Â Any thoughts ? Btw i think its everyones own right to do what they want with their livez, live or die.
When you sink into your low points, the pro/con ratio presents itself. You search for reasons to stay or go. It’s pathetic that a lifetime bottles down into a risk vs. reward scenario.
My question is, do you really need a reason? Do you honestly have to maul over the burdens that make living desirable?
It can be true that most of life’s setbacks are temporary problems. But some linger and will never be resolved. When they continue to stack up and never find a working solution, hope is in decline.
So I find it’s not as simple as hovering over one reason or a couple. It’s […]
I hope this will bring comfort to someone the way it did for me
I wrote this a long time ago, in my teens when I was first coming to terms with my depression and feeling suicidal. This was one of the many many poems I wrote going through a really bad time. Thought some of you might relate or have at some point.
I can’t bare to go on much longer
These suicidal feelings continue to grow stronger
The only escape is in my sleep
I’ve dug this whole and now I’m in to deep
Don’t act like you know how I feel
For you see this life of mine is surreal
Still praying you hear my desolate […]
Well… It’s because I care.
I care about all of you and I want you to be happy.
I know that you’re not happy. =_=â€
And that’s okay; we all have our own problems.
As I’ve been reading some of your posts I know you don’t want to die but you want to take your pain away and leave from your problems. However there is always hope. Let’s not give up. ‪
I know I can’t change your decision because….only someone who lives in that painful know clearly how hurt […]
I am 19 and for the past 3 years I have felt like shit. I fell hopeless, unloved, unimportant, insignificant. I feel like nothing really matters. I feel like my life is directionless and has no meaning. I am in major pain. I have a low self esteem even though I have been told the opposite of what I think. I feel like people are lying to me. I make good grades in my college courses that I take. I still feel stupid. I feel unwanted. I have no friends and no boyfriend because I am introverted. I can’t seem to make myself feel better […]
Have you ever felt like you were surrounded by darkness? A darkness so deep and pain so real that you just want it all to end? Have you ever felt like the world would be a better place without you in it? How about that you are so worthless that if people really knew who you were they would hate you as much as you hate yourself? Do you have a plan to end your life? Have you given up all hope? I have! Depression is real and the pain is intense, but there is hope —  Watch “Story 2013” on YouTube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CNbKbMIjLvU
I am scared, and confused.
I wonder why the voices won’t leave my head.
I hear them talking all around.
I see them when I try to sleep.
I want to get rid of them.
I am scared, and confused.
I pretend that they’re not there.
I feel their presences, it gives me chills.
I touch my mind to erase what I’ve seen.
I worry that they will be around me forever.
I cry because everyone thinks I’m crazy.
I am scared, and confused.
I understand that medicine won’t take them away.
I say that medicine doesn’t help to my doctors, but they don’t understand.
I dream […]
I just found it today. I don’t know you have read it or not yet… hope you enjoy it
Here is the full article:Â http://shakeoffthegrind.com/emotional-health/free-yourself-by-letting-go-of-what-you-cant-control
have a nice day!
I’ve been through so much only to reach this point again.
Got through my mother hating me my whole life, I get she has problems but not letting your 11 year old participate in family anythings, I mean what the hell. And then I was still expected to function like a normal child while my savior, my dad was sneaking me food. I’m past that now, she did horrid things to me but I’ve forgiven her.
Wow, forgot to mention the fact that my parents were (father occasionally) raging alcoholics put on earth by satan himself, thanks man.
Got through my dad beating me later […]
Does anyone else ever put themselves in risky situations in hopes that they might be killed? Like walking at night hoping to get ran over or stabbed, or going hiking in an unknown area and you’re inexperienced, driving in bad weather, or do some extreme sport or activity. Anything that puts you at risk, because you feel like it would be better to get in an “accident” instead of committing suicide, which has so much stigma attached to it.
I do this, I find myself not caring if something happens to me. A lot of times IÂ hope something happens to me.
Life is a battle that we all must eventually lose. Each and every one of us is constantly at war. Fighting for survival. Some have a more difficult battle to fight and some lose before they’re ready…
I guess what I’m saying is that life is difficult. There are so many risks. People die everyday… A lot of people. Death is a part of life. It’s inevitable, but sometimes it comes too soon. The lives of peoples children, peoples mothers or fathers are taken every day without a choice. And here I am… Wanting to throw it away… and for what? What would I benefit from killing […]
Everyone seems to lie, because the truth’s too painful. My mother and father l, by trying to work out a marriage that was doomed from the beginning. My sister pretends she isn’t hungry. My mother lies about the man she loves, the man that’s not my father. So where do I stand? Do I lie and pretend I’m happy? Do I admit that I’m not happy and I need professional help, although I’m pretty sure I’m beyond that? Do I keep on saying I’m just tired, that I’m stressed? I’ve been doing this for too long, we all have. Do I lie again, to myself, […]
So I just got this idea in English class that I could write a story thats 365 pages (they’re practically gonna be chapters) and each one is going to be journal entries for each day of the year. But on the very last day of the year, she is going to commit suicide and succeed. This book is going to turn out very well i hope. I might post it page by page on here. Maybe two pages/chapters a day, but that will only happen when I finish the entire book/story thing.
Things are a little shaky in life.
All thanks to one person. It’s interesting, what one person can do in your life.
*sigh* Well, here’s another video of mine. I hope you like it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TPZIr0PUZ4
Sincerely,
Nobody915
All men are mortal
Some men die old from age
Some men die of their own choosing to escape the hardship of life
Some men are murdered
and some men die courageously for their own principles
I hope to be one of these to die as I live; courageously
Hey people. It’s been a little while again, hasn’t. Maybe two weeks maybe less. And here I am again. Not to worry, I gave my word on not giving up and fighting these grey days till the bitter end, andd I’m still doing it. I maybe flawed in many ways but that promise is something I don’t want to break. So why am I here then? Well I wanted to ask about a few things and give a little update on myself. Maybe it’ll make someone’s day better knowing I’m still kicking.
So over the past two weeks, a couple of things have happened. To […]
You thought you could control me and you did, you still do. One thing I want most in life is to become the bigger person, and be able to forgive and forget. Why is it that you make this so impossible for me. I hate you with every inch of my being, my core, soul, or whatever it is that comprises this sad excuse of a human being that I am.
Every hit you gave, physical or emotional, scarred me to an extent which I am ashamed to admit. No one should have such control over another human being like you do with me. I see […]