I am a misanthropist! Full of hatred towards the human race. To me this life is counterfeit, full of bullshit from the little specks of atoms that we are in this unfathomably large universe. I am in no way religious, I do not believe in shit other than we’ll find the truth out when we individually die. Just a rant from my crippled ass. Be well to all on this site, every second that goes by we are closer to the end of this existence (like it or not – tick fucking tock:-)
Tag:
life
life is love for somebody but when you love somebody you will miss them and it hurts but when you lose those you love and miss you feel like you got hit by evrything bad but in time you lern to see the little shine there is in death and when you find out what death is you wil know that it is a pretty thing,
when I was younger all I wanted to do was grow up, now I just wish I was 5 when life was easy and carefree. Growing up sucks, period.
Why am I still alive?! I’ve been drinking antifreeze for the past two weeks! Believe me, enough of it to kill 6 adults. Why am I just falling asleep like it’s nyquil?!!! What the fuck?! I don’t believe in religion, I don’t want to talk about it, and don’t offer me help. I know life is suffering and I’m trying to fucking leave! Why can’t I get out?! I’m just here killing time.
I remember a few months back, I was so stressed. My mom and siblings couldn’t understand me at all. I used to cry in the shower, shower in the dark, I wanted to die so bad, but I love life.. My story may not be as intense as other but I just wanted to share my story, you should love life, and there is a suicidal phone number where you can call to talk to people. What may come to you may hurt you but life only wants to see how strong you are, so don’t let it hurt you, show it that you can […]
I hate myself. I hate my mind. I hate how it warps my sources of happiness into sources of anguish. All of the people and passions that made life worth living now make life unbearable. I can’t trust anyone, not because I’ve been hurt, but because I am paranoid and afraid. I don’t want to disappoint them or make them hate me. Because my mind is so twisted, I will take their most minute actions and scrutinize them…fabricate reasons why they might hate and despise me. I tell myself my family only stays with me out of pity. I tell myself that former friends are […]
Lately I have been thinking, I am not the person I used to be. The fact that I can’t get it out of my head makes me so fucking sad. I think back at the person I used to be and now that things have changed… Many, many things have changed. It makes me so mad and depressed about it. It sucks too because I just want to not think about it. But they won’t leave. I can’t think of any way to stop thinking than to just “stop existing.” Because why else should I even be here, if I am just going to keep […]
Dear whoever,
Is there even anybody who reads this? Or maybe we’re all just self indulgent in our misery :/
Anyway here I am, this is new. I feel silly. My boyfriend abuses me. Mostly emotionally but sometimes physically. It’s not stopping.
Tbh I must be really unlucky or been a dictator in my past life. I was adopted because my parents were too young and too high on some kind of drug, I don’t know which they never told me. Unfortunately my adopted parents weren’t…great? Well my mum mainly, but I blame my dad more because he knew she was hurting me but ignored it.
So I guess […]
suicide does not end the chances of life getting worse, suicide eliminates the possibility of it ever getting better <3
I wrote a whole long spiel but in the end I’ll just reduce it to this:
Fellow people who didn’t grow up with *close* friends or *supportive* family, how have you created meaning in your life? I’ve always thought life’s meaning was what you made out of it– and I still do– but now I’m realizing you can’t make anything out of life if you don’t believe it could become a reality. And you can’t believe in a dream like that if you don’t believe in yourself. My problem is I don’t know how to believe in myself. I think psychological research has bolstered the theory […]
I have read a lot of posts from here over the years, particularly when I Google something random and crazy about death or killing myself lol. I decided to make an account earlier when I read some posts about donating organs after suicide. I have been in love with death for many years now. I think I romanticize the thought in my head too much sometimes. I am of peaceful and sound mind. I would never hurt anyone so I assure those reading this that no one (except maybe my own self..) is in any physical danger on my behalf.
I am going to be 23 […]
If your battling depression and issues in your life right now. The crazy stuff going on in the world doesnt help much.
We have plagues like Ebola and the Black Plague popping up and killing lot of people. Other mysterious illnesses are
popping up and injuring people and doctors don’t even know what some of the Illnesses are. e have wars in the middle east
we have countries beefing up their arsenal of nuclear weapons and making threats towards other nations.
We have governments taking away peoples rights and people that have been sworn to protect us making declensions
that make things worse for us…. and some of those elected […]
just when you think you got it all together life hits you with a curve ball and puts you back in the slumps.
Life sucks. It’s pretty simple. When you are born…your mother shits and pisses herself (at least most women do). So you’re born into shit and piss. When you die…you defecate yourself. Your life begins and ends in shit. And do you know what is all through your life? Shit. We do our best to get through it. But it’s all shit. People are fake liars. And even the best of us (humans/mankind) are pretty fucking terrible. Nothing good ever lasts. The pain and loneliness of life just builds and mounts. We sleep, eat, work, pay bills, go through heartache, headaches, financial problems, have families that […]
If I could just do it right now, it would be very little planning, as few “tools” as possible and I would REALLY enjoy feeling physically amazing just before starting.
I would want to do something quick, like a little slit of the wrists, thighs,and then carotid and jugular veins / arteries. Either that our I’d eat a bullet. Quick, precise, and thorough.
The only reason I can’t do it right
this moment is because I have so much shit to wrap up so that I know that I will be absolutely no more burden to anyone. , Plus, if I were to go […]
The time is drawing near….
I fear. It’s coming on a lot faster than I expected it to. It’s a little odd how the more and more I feel the need to exit this life, the less and less detailed and involved it needs to be. I used to sit and think about how much better things would be for me and for everyone else if I wasn’t here. It was like I would daydream about how wonderful I would “feel” and how free everyone else would be. I would picture my services when I was laid to rest and I would think of all […]
Suicide has been my main preoccupation for the past few months, primarily resulting from an intense burst of unbelievable drama. Let’s just say it had to do with an ex-boyfriend I love dearly and who was on the precipice of never talking to me again (because I broke up with him) which was this huge ticking time bomb floating above my head just counting down the seconds until it exploded. And explode it did. The explosion was catalyzed by a backstabbing by my sister where she not only stuck the knife in deep, but then twisted it, dumped salt into the blood-soaked wound, and then […]
I feel emotionally disconected. There is no reason for me to feel depressed or sad, because I don’t have what anyone would consider a bad life. I feel disgusting, because other people have real reasons to be sad and depressed, yet here I am. There is nothing special about me. There is no reason for anyone to extend an effort to help me out because I don’t feel like I contribute to society in the slightest. The only reason why I feel any guilt is that I do not want my few friends and my small family to feel like they failed. No one failed […]
Since Labor Day weekend, I’ve been walking a track circle; on one end is glorious hope and love, on the other is despair, hopelessness, heartbreak. I’ve been researching suicide methods over the weeks, not often, but when I slide down the rabbit hole. Today I began a more in depth search into methods; I have several on my mind. Thinking I will commit to a plan once Thanksgiving is over. Always, once this, once that….I’m so tired. I wish I could just end it once and for all. Life is too overwhelming, too heartbreaking, too tiring. Hope is tiring.
I don’t know what I’m doing. People always say “there is reason for living, there is reason to stay alive” but I don’t see that. What’s my reason? My 3 best friends of 3.5 years that stopped talking to me two days before my birthday? My dad that left when I was two weeks old?
A friend of mine once said to me (before his girlfriend blocked me on his account) “You can’t say no one else has any reason for living.” but what I was trying to say to him was, why are any of us alive? What is the point of life? We aren’t […]