So it is awfully shitty to take a pre test online for ajob and realize u cannot even begin to do the math on the sample questions,,, how scvrewed up is that? its simple percents and iam not able to do that so i feel quite defeated right now!! as if i could think yself better~na not happening in this lifetime\1 SUCKS TO B ME!
Tag:
Lifetime
I’m 12. Freaking 12. And I have a suicide note written.
When I was 11, I fell into a depression. I wasn’t quite sure why, I guess my parents pissed me off too much. I couldn’t go a day without crying. Sure, call me a crybaby.
It was too much stress. I had projects due, tests upcoming, essays my dad forced me to write. I hyperventilated at least five times.
One day, I was printing out another essay when my dad was yelling at me in the other room. I looked down and saw the printer cord…and then suicide popped into my mind. Why not?
I wrapped the cord around my […]
Hello all, I’m new here. And I’m wondering if anyone else could decipher the above question for me. My (highly depressed) friend and I were talking about it a while ago, but considering we’re both kind of screwed up in the head, we never came to a conclusion. I just… don’t understand how someone can live for him or herself. I admire people who can do that but… I can’t comprehend it.
Maybe it’s cause I’ve lived most of my life trying to live up to people’s expectations (and failing) but… Aren’t we surrounded by attachments – family members, friends etc…? In a sense, don’t we […]
My life feels like I’m walking on a rock road.. Always cold and dark. Never knowing if I’m going to trip. When I do, I hesitate to get back up. Afraid of tripping and falling again. I always get back up though. Some falls take longer to stand up from.. Something keeps me going down this road.. The hope that the sun is going to wink at me and give me light to see the obstacles in the road. I don’t know how long it’ll take and maybe I’ll never see it in this lifetime. Someday though, whether I’m dead or alive, I’ll see the […]
Yeah, because finding you dead, being shocked at what they see, calling your name, not hearing your voice, trying to wake you up, not feeling your warm skin or breath anymore, freaking out, shouting for help, crying, trying to get you to talk to them again, asking if you’re okay, wondering why you refuse to at least tell them to fuck off, calling the paramedics over, calling the cops, family friends and neighbors are now like WTF, the medics put their compassion to 300% for everyone’s sakes, the police give their part to determine malicious intent or otherwise, they try breathing life into you, they […]
There’s nothing wrong with my life, besides the fact that I’m a useless leech. I’m 28 and haven’t done a damn thing with my life. I’ve always been told that it’s because I’m lazy, and I’ve accepted it. I’ve been sad for no *good* reason for most of my life (plenty of shallow reasons–too stupid, too ugly, too awkward, etc, etc). Attempted suicide once, many years ago. Woke up in intensive care to suffer massive guilt from my mother. My dad wouldn’t speak to me for almost a year after that–just flat out ignored me, though we lived in the same house. (Because of course […]
I have tried just about everything. I started trying when I was seven years old and have not been successful this far. I am 42 and am in chronic pain. My health is failing which as you could imagine makes one very depressed. As for the gun shot I didn’t try it myself my brother did it for me. At seven I received a gun shot directly into the eye and spent six months in the hospital. I lost an eye over it and a lifetime of pain. Today my health is failing because of the damage that gun did to me all those years […]
I once asked my friend what he thought about suicide.He told me “suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem”, he told me it was gutless and a cowardly thing to do.
I think it’s the bravest thing anybody could ever do. To end your life and welcome death and look him straight in the eye, i think it’s the bravest thing anybody could ever achieve.
I’ve thought about it, many times, I don’t think there is a person who hasn’t had the thought of ending it all cross their mind in their entire lifetime. I am new to this site but already it’s helping me, every time I look […]
Right now, I am contemplating life. What’s the point? Purpose eludes me. At this moment, I don’t see much point in going forward. My life is mediocre at best. And even if it gets better.. what is “better,” and what is it really worth? Does better mean more money? At this moment, I couldn’t care less about money. Money can’t buy happiness or love. It could buy me a house, but what would I do in it that I don’t already do (eat, sleep, bathe, find ways to entertain myself..). I could go back to school.. to do what? Get a better job to make […]
I know people will hate me and there is no way out my situation – this is why I can’t see a therapist. I have a “girlfriend”, who was once a fiance. We had a child together and then she immediately got fat – I don’t mean a few pounds, but nearly 200. She also stopped bathing (except once per week), smokes constantly (even though she has high blood pressure). She is absolutely revolting to me. I feel so absolutely ashamed when I am in public with her – I walk a couple feet behind her, etc. I can’t have friends – because of this. […]
I’m 36 years old, a bad mother, a worse wife. no job, no life, I finally got the storybook family and life I always wanted, but now I have to sit by the sidelines and watch it go by. I’ve tried a total of four or five times now to get rid of myself over my lifetime, and I can’t even get that right. I am a useless, burden to my family. They would be better off without me and won’t even know I’m gone. I use to believe that I was here for a reason and that everything that I have gone through would mean […]
Borderline personality disorder: Society’s way of saying that you’re a ticking time bomb. Abandonment issues only get worse with time. When you get numb to the pain, your mind simply widens it’s threshold. Boxing lessons: They will happen. You have only two choices in life: Die, or grow another day older. Immortality can be measured by things accomplished in your lifetime, as well as how long you endured this lifetime.
Is it really selfish to kill oneself because you’ve had a lifetime of misery? Why is it ok to force someone to withstand many numerous years of unending misery to save a few people a few days or weeks of pain? I am a suicide survivor myself. I was 15 when my mother took her own life, and yes, I have remained angry with her for the last 13 years, but that was different. She had a 15 year old child and a 6 year old child she was responsible for. I have no children whatsoever, and don’t intend to have any. I recently tried […]
I have 5 sisters. My imperfections used to be guarded by my older sister, she’s 18. She rebelled against my family, did very unfortunate things, and next to her I was perfect. Then she was kicked out of the house. With her gone, all my imperfections came to light. I now sit between two perfect sisters. One is 23, the other 15. I am 17 and next to them I feel worthless. They are always better than me. They love better than me, they are more fun than me, and they have a better personality than me. At least that’s what my parents make clear. […]
WHY?
That’s the only question I have for you.
WHY DID YOU DO THIS?
I can’t keep doing this, I don’t understand. Why would you make humans capable of love? It’s a horrid, horrid emotion? I don’t understand what we did to deserve this kind of cruel and unusual punishment. You made us in your own image, right? What, did you just have so much love in your heart that you had to give each and every one of us a bit of it, so that we could feel the pain you’ve felt in having to give up so much for us? Well, I’ll tell you one thing, […]
Yesterday, I got arrested for obstructing justice. My parents were not pleased, obviously. Especially my father. I don’t have a close relationship with my father, so I think it was pretty easy for him to disown me as his son. My mom tried to defend me and say that I’ve accompolished a lot in my lifetime, but then my dad pointed a finger at me and said, “when the fuck was the last time this stupid son of a ***** did ANYTHING right? Give me date!”. I wanted to stab him so bad… But then I realized he was right. I haven’t done shit with […]
“True love ~ Broken dreamsâ€
-Hai, my name is Peter Alesana also other’s would like to call me Petii. I’m going to share a story about broken dreams, the human mentally capacity of fighting for your loved one, for your dreams, shattered lost soul, never endless suffering, a story what will encourage you to stand up and keep pushing even if everything seems to be dark and hopeless , when you are on two knees praying, shaking in the unconditional pain, when you cried so much that your tears turn into blood but won’t stop falling regardless how try you hard, when there is no one else there to […]
Just not sure of everything again. I cannot believe this feeling would revisit me this soon. I feel like it was just weeks ago that I started feeling great inside. Today, it’s just the opposite.
Everyday, I’m feeling irritated of almost everything and everyone around. My family’s full of judgemental beings. My parents are way too preoccupied with caring for their favorite daughter’s son. My brothers are way too busy playing their games. Older sisters are too busy with their lives. Younger sister currently living under the same roof is full of judgement. At one point in this lifetime, I feel close to her, like […]
I’m normally a very independent person. I don’t need people, they don’t need me, but I NEED YOU NOW. There’s this chance I might have, I don’t even know if I have it yet, but there’s a chance of a chance. I usually don’t like hope; I shut it down, but I started hoping today and I was too far gone by the time I realized it.
So I’m just hoping now. So I figured if I was going to ruin my fragile mental state with hope (you have not seen what hope can do to me; its pretty scary), I might as well try. […]
We are born, are educated, get a job, find a partner, have a family, make enough money to stave off discomfort, live the constant struggle of existence, get old, weak and sad, and then die.
Man killing man, people starving while others watch, rape, death: It all seems so illogical, so pointless. Life must be the complete stupidity of existence itself. Therefore we need to create artificial meaning to prop up our petty lives. We depend on religion, which answers our questions by referring to another world that doesn’t exist but provides a so called reason for living. Some people survive through apathy and conformity, following […]