My name is faith and I haven’t told anybody about my real story I’m not sure if i know it very well myself, anyways it all began when I was the happiest little girl you would have ever met. My best friend was my dog Zena she was always there to listen and she was always by my side to protect me she actually saved my life a couple of times. And then she became sick where she needed to take pills for medicine and everything was fine until one day where I knew something didnt feel right the morning of a school day but I […]
Tag:
Met
A couple of days ago i met my ex who had had the abortion. We haven’t really spoken about it since it happened and so when i brought it up it was a bit of a touchy subject. She had told a friend about it and they had advised her to write a letter to the baby and just say how she was feeling, she never had though.
We decided we would write one together. None of us knew what to say though and so we just sat for a while. Then we wrote ‘sorry’! That’s all i could say at first but then we got […]
I hate the term ‘to help’ because it means that you have a problem to be fixed in the first place.
I am a teenager and have already been through more than most people can even imagine. My biological father left when I was a baby and is in and out of jail. I haven’t met him, nor do I want to, but that event in my life is still a part of who I am today so it was worth mentioning. When I was young (2-5) I was physically abused by my stepfather at the time (also my little brother’s dad). I have two half […]
Why I am so paranoid…
Why I refuse to make new friends…
Why I always hide what I feel behind tongues…
Why I think the worst of people whom I had never met…
Why I never get close to anyone…
Well, I will tell you.. But only once for my memory isn’t the best and reliving what had happened only scars me even more…
He was there for me. He wasn’t my significant other or anything, in fact he was more of a big brother to me. You see I used to have an older brother, but he passed away due to cancer.. After many years of not having and older […]
I’m still breathing, the blood is still rushing through my veins, my hands are still moving. From the outside, everything seems to be okay. I seem like a normal high school girl, with a bubbly personality, always smiling, always happy. If only they would take the time to look beneath that mask I put on everyday. If only they would go that extra step to notice that the countless scars on my arm are not from my rabbits, but from my Swiss knife. If only they would realize that their words kick me over the edge every time.
I could probably spend ages going through each […]
I was watching this movie called My S.O. Has Got Depression about a Man who gets depression and struggles to deal with it and how it affects his relationship with his wife. What I liked about this movie was how it well it depicted depression but for me what really made it hit home was Tsure’s (main  character) feelings of uselessness and how some of the people around him wouldn’t understand his depression and would approach him with a “you need to toughen up” approach to things. After watching the movie I read an interview about Tenten Hosokawa the author who wrote the book that […]
Hi, my name is Tatyana, people call me tatty. As I was growing up everything seemed normal, mom always thought I had ADHD and everyone else said I was normal. But I wasn’t. My mom met the man ad her dreams, so she thought. He was nice, to her. Me.. Well he’d beat the hell out of me. He’s make me bleed, he smashed me so hard he got my blood on the wall and on my bed, I was only 5 years old. I’ve been in 8 foster homes. They were all horrible. Tryed killing myself when I was 7 I over dosed on […]
Come on baby do you think it’s good to feel
Like I’m lying here swimming in memories
I fear God because everything dies babe
Got a gun in the back of my Car
A spasm of good sense is making my eye twitch
I’ve had enough on your consolation.
I’m drowning caught in a shit tide
Tape my face to the inside of love
Nothing to eat but fingers in the back seat
Well i’ve met God and he had nothing to say to me
I pray to god that you’re right before my eyes,
Bathed in white light with halos in your eyes.
Don’t wanna waste no […]
for the first time in 18 months I saw the love of my life in action-via video. It was filmed just months before I met him. he was so happy, smiling and laughing. i recalled that smile, remembered that laugh. felt that feeling he gave me. we just lied in bed all day holding each other. but underneath we felt the same thing. we walked in on me once as I was vomiting up a large amount of pills. my liver will never be the same. I watched his eyes fade over the months as he sunk deeper into PF. I followed him down the […]
Its not totally clear. Everything between now and when I was a miserable as a child is a blur now. Things really sucked, I met her and things were good for a bit. However all that good is gone now and it just feels I’ll I can recall now is a 33 year continuum of shit. I guess I’m grateful there were a few good years.
I can’t help it. I just can’t stand it anymore. I’m so alone… There’s no one for me. No one to care, no one to help, no one to even just see.
My friends have been ignoring me, and I don’t know why. I know I’ve snapped a few times, but they have too. And now, one of them, one of the two who mean the most to me, hates me–at the very least. I want to say is was because he wouldn’t communicate with me. I feel like he’s blaming me for everything that happened, and I hate it. I get blamed for enough […]
Well, I guess my story starts from the day that I was born. My mother, so I’ve been told, started drinking around the age of twelve. She was from an extremely abusive household and I figure she needed something to get her mind off of it. I don’t hold it against her. Anyway, she had about seven kids with a different man every time all over the United States and dropped us with the fathers. She committed suicide when I was about ten, not that it mattered. I never met the women and I don’t really care to.
My father also had a very, very, […]
i’ve never posted here before. i’ve read a lot of posts, and wanted to respond to many… but i never could find the right words, because i would feel hypocritical telling someone “it will be okay”, when in fact it very well may not be. i know that’s not the point, but still.
i had everything i every truly wanted. i was married to the most beautiful girl in the world, who also was my very best friend. i have been head over heels in love with her since we first met in 2001. i was 19 then, she was 16. we both made some mistakes, […]
I’m too sane for this crazy world. You can’t be a man who’s word means something in a world filled with liars & manipulators. I know. I was one of those once. I did the work to change. I made my name synonymous with integrity and honor. I fought every day for my family, for others, for the underdog. Then one day everything I worked for was demolished by the person who I thought cared the most. Someone who placed the blame for their choices, choices they made years before I ever met them, on my shoulders. And I looked around and no one was […]
This day hasn’t been a good one I talk to the one I call mom and she fould out that I tried to kill myself and she told me that she won’t know what she would do if I was gone. The problem with that was that I can’t get those thoughts out of me head. I just keep thinking that my family’s life would be better if I wasn’t around and that my “friends” lives would have been better if they had never met me. I don’t know that for a fact but I do know that they wouldn’t have a depressed friend around […]
Why am I here? That is the question i have been asking myself lately.  I just don’t get it.  I feel like God is just keeping me here as entertainment. My mom is pregnant and felt like she was going to have the baby early, so she was in the hospital and got to come home yesterday.  I had soccer practice, but i feel slow and tired so i haven’t been playing good.  It just feels like the world is moving without me. All my family does anymore is yell. My dad says it’s my fault we fight, but couldn’t give me any reasons why […]
all right so im a 15 year old male im inlove with a 38 year old bi sexual. i met her from my moms work my mom inturduced me to her said id like her. i thought she was ugly n short.3 weeks later we went to the beach. she came down on a saturday and asked me to spend the night at her motel cause she was alone so i did n we talked for about 2 hours now im in love with her. How do i ask her out or do anything with her. i dont want sex just someone to care hug […]
today after school i hung out with my friend lily she is really nice i met her in P.E i also hung out with my ex or bf or what ever he is we went back to her house and started drinking i just followed along because i did not know what to do it helped numb the pain… after i left they he stayed at her house and continue drinking the scotch she pulled out of her parents liquor cabinet… when i got home i started doing shots of vodka and i did some drinking while i was home by my self i almost […]
One last breathe
Pull it in deep
One more pill
To put me to sleep
25
26
swallow it quick
This pain is restraining
I can’t keep on waiting
I’m lost and confused
I’m done trying to choose
It’s the finale goodbye
The last farewell
I’ll met you all
In that place called hell
Today, I met a little girl,
With brown hair and brown eyes.
She is only ten years young,
But beyond her years she’s wise.
Today, I learned that life’s not fair.
This girl, she cuts her skin.
Barely grown, yet feels such pain,
From outside and within.
Today, I saw the truth denied,
To me by many folk.
Life is hell and then you die.
Today, I finally broke.