my name is robert, and i am having difficulties with life at the moment, i guess you can say that i am not as depressing , i am very strong actually but even the toughest can fall down sometimes. i have a emotional attachemtn problem , my problem is that i fell in love and i don’t know how to let go. it started of as friends typical right? but it was so great , the greatest friends you could find ;were not that regular we like to do the same things we love only horror movies , we like earie things ,murder cases,stuff like […]
Tag:
Mom
I came out I was bi to my mom and it wasn’t the reaction I expected it to be. I expected it to be tears of joy but it was tears of madness and anger and I started to cry cause i didn’t know why she was getting mad of the situation I mean aren’t u gonna be happy for me i came out to u cause I trust you and now I have no choice but to think to kill myself I mean why hasn’t god taken me yet i mean it’s my time to go :/
About seven or eight year ago I moved to the UK with my grand mum. She’s great. The best I could have. Unfortunately I can’t say the same about my mum. Don’t get me wrong, I love her too, but there’s certain things about her I can’t forgive. One is the fact that she’d rather be a WOMAN than a MUM. It sounds quite strange doesn’t it? What I mean to say is that she’d rather be with her partner than with her children. It’s not AS horrible as it sounds, but it is rather bad. My mum and my brothers, they stayed back at […]
I’ve spent a long while thinking about my decision. Life just is just shit for me and it always will be. Shit started when I was 6, when I just came to Ireland with my mom to meet my da, I honestly had no memory of him before, life got bad when he entered it. It was a bearable kind of bad though. My sister was born later, after a while I got used to him beating my mom. It was bearable. When I turned eight and he got his new job, I dont know why but he began to turn on me as well […]
I’m probably being stupid, I keep thinking that the only reason that I should continue living is so that my family don’t end up hurt but I’m starting to question my theory. I found my release a week or so ago, cutting, it helped me a bit. Whenever I got shouted at for poor conduct at school or something, I’d concentrate on the pain and everything else would just go silent no matter HOW hard they scream at me, I just wouldn’t hear it. It’s become a routine, planning out and researching how to end my pathetic existence that can’t even affect society, if I […]
iv had a lot of thing happen to me in my life but the one thing that iv learned is that the people and things that are closest to you are the things that can hurt you
the most.
just recently i left my dad (im 16 by the way), my parents are divorced and every since iv felt like an empty shell, not because they are divorced but because they
are such different people.
all i want is to be normal, to get good exam results and go to a good college and get a good job, but i cant, i cant because i […]
Most of my life I have not felt motivated to do anything by my family. My mom is the only one who shows some support but I find myself saying “Why can’t my other family members do that?” Now look I do know what self motivation is in fact I consider myself the master of it because if I wanted motivation I would have to give myself it. For awhile it seemed good for things to be like that. You know put myself through some stuff without any encouragement but after awhile I long for it. I don’t ask for much just a simple “You […]
So I live in a house with my 2 parents and 3 younger sisters. I also have 2 older sisters, but my family broke a little while back and I am no longer allowed to talk to one of them. Somewhere in the midst of my family breaking, my relationship with my parents also broke. I can’t explain why, but I can’t talk to them. Any time they are around, I have absolutely no personality. I never show happiness, sadness, anger, anything. Only when they are around though, it is strange. When they are gone I have a huge personality, I’m funny and sarcastic, loud […]
I wanted to thank one person for asking if I can use help locating resources in my town, I appreciate it, actually I already have been using resources in my area, and unfortunately being bi-polar, I am to the point in my life where I trust almost no-one. Seems when I tell people that know me I am bi-polar, all of a suddenly I am treated differently. I had an experience about a month ago one of my AA sponsors already knew me a little and long story short made me feel like a psycho, so to him I say F**** off. One last thing […]
Hello, I’m marissa and I’m suicidal, achoolic, drug addict, and anorexic. I’m 14 and I drink and do drugs every night. I make myself puke 3 times a day. I have suicidal thoughts every night.
I live with my mom and her husband(sadly my step dad) I’m verbaly abused by both of them everyday. I was several times physical. I have no control over my life. I’ve tried to runaway but I always get caught. I’ve tried to take my life but always get talked out.
My father wasn’t there at my birth and was really never there for me. He moved to Florida when […]
My father’s existance summarizes how my life has been for me in a metaphorical term. Emotional blackmail.
My father calls me 24 times a day sometimes more for very trivial things. I do them. If i don’t I know what will happen.
Trash, yard, clean, glass of water, make my food, find my shoes, shave my beard, find my clothes, mow the lawn, water the grass, find my glasses, where’s my tooth brush, let’s get groceries. You go in the store I’ll stay outside (he talks on the phone to some woman i don’t know) Oh i didn’t give you enough money? How much is the […]
I miss the people who know me. Now I know how it feels to finally see the people I badly wanted to be with because they knew me and then realize that I left behind the ones who really know me for these people who will never understand me or even care to try to learn who I am. It hurts. I thought this is what I wanted but these aren’t the people I grew up with…
I’m home… Fuck it I have no home. I thought I wanted this but I’m still fucking miserable. Guess I’ll never be really happy again. I feel more trapped […]
They are terrible. My grandma is fucking crazy and she screams at me and chases me around. I live with my grandparents. My grandpa has no heart for the emotion of another human being. They used to beat their kids. My mom hit me really hard yesterday because of something stupid. I’m gifted but they tell me I’m not. They don’t encourage me or any of my talents or anything I do. They constantly blame me for things and make me feel like shit. I have no confidence. I don’t go out. I don’t do anything. I research and self-educate myself a lot but they […]
ugh i need advise can you guys plz read this and tell me what i should do about it
by gen19
written by gen19
I haven been here in sometime, mostly because i found and amazing guys who gives me a reason to live and fights for me at moments when i feel like giving up. But as you guys know it life cant be great for people like us things always get screwed up for us. My mom hates my boyfriend and has gone to the extend of telling me that i have to pick between her or my boyfriend and if i see my boyfriend again i would stop being her daughter and that i might as well just kill her because thats what im doing by […]
I wish I had an interesting story but I don’t. I just want to die.
by SuicideBoy
written by SuicideBoy
I read all of your stories here, and I feel sad, angry at the world, frustrated and at times soothed. I think of my own story and feel nothing.
I don’t have a story, just the pain that comes with it. I grew up in a normal family, had normal friends, got normal grades and, for the most part, was normal. But as far back as I can remember I’ve wanted to die. The thought consumes me.
My first close call happened when I was 15 and in the school play. I screwed up horribly, and after the show I went to an old bridge and sat […]
I’m a monster. I destroy everything I touch. I’m a freak.
These are the thoughts that have plagued my mind for the past two years. It all started when I lost my best friend in 9th grade. After she joined band, we got into different social groups. I always had issues with making new friends, so I became her “stalker”. She began to distance herself from me, and I began to threaten to cut myself to get her to talk to me. At first the threats weren’t serious, but threats always turn into promises. When the cuts eventually lost its effectiveness, I began making suicidal threats. […]
HAPPY FATHERS DAY.
Happy Fathers Day everyone! Well, today’s the day. The first Fathers Day without my dad. It’s kinda sad .. I’ve been trying not to think about it, because it’ll just hurt more. I still never found out how he died, I think someone’s hiding something from me. I don’t think autopsy’s take that long, does anyone agree? He’s been gone for about 8 months. Time flies! He was a drug addict. Always has been. He’s always gotten away with everything, & I believe in Karma honestly! Right around the time he died, he was trying to do the right thing. […]
I don’t know why I’m writing this, maybe it’s to release all my feelings somehow but I don’t think it’ll make a difference. I didn’t have a great childhood. My parents always fought and my dad was/is abusive. It hurt to see him hurt my mom and my two younger sisters. I used to care that he hit me but I got used to it and I just wanted to protect everybody else. Heck, I used to crave him abusing me because in my head that meant scars, bruises, belt marks. Evidence. I hoped that one day it would get so bad that someone would […]
Hey. I did it. I survived till Florida. Thanks for all your help guys. Of course I’ll still stick around the site sometimes. My mom hasn’t noticed my scars yet but I think I’ve figurd out how I’m gonna handle it. Strangely, I’ve only been here a day and a half but all anxiety and panic attacks, stress, pain, it’s all completely dissapeared. God I’m so happy to be home. At the same time I kinda miss being miserable :/ But again, Thank you for helping me to get here alive.
oh how i want to go down 6 feet and be free
ill be away from this world and the hurt its caused me
so its selted, ill force a bullet right into my heart
ill end all the pain from the place it had to start
ill be in bliss and euporia and maybe feel okay
“i was too weak to go on”, ill make sure my note will say
im sorry for the confusion, you raised me right mom
it was me who chose to do this, so please try to stay calm
i know this is hard for you, seeing me in crimson
but one day youll realize that this was […]