Tag:

nothing

Winner take All

by LifeafterDeath 5/14/2014

written by LifeafterDeath

It’s suicide vs the survival instinct.

Both ideas and feelings generated from the same brain. So why would the brain want us to survive and die ? wheres the logic ?

a short example:

experiencing a full manic episode, you a hold a knife up to your heart, you’re convinced all you wanna do is jam that baby in there, it starts with a nice big confident swing but then just before impact your arm goes soft ? or your mind goes numb and nothing happens ?? And for what. What possible reason

Some kind of fucked up cosmic joke.

Hi 🙂

5/14/2014 5 comments

Yes I want to die

by Scarface 5/14/2014

written by Scarface

Hello everyone I know you are all battling your own wars..here nobody aint got time for me to listen to me or counsel me for my suicidal thoughts are just increasing manifolds……i seriously aint in the humour to write I am 18,India and right now I’m high and i got the rope ready I just wanted everyone to know that yes i was defeated everywhere its not because of u krati u were my first love and i want to die with her being my last its all coz of me myself i cant survive i aint strong enough i am not the one maybe […]

5/14/2014 4 comments

Does it get easier?

by -E- 5/13/2014

written by -E-

Does it get any easier? Dealing with the pain? The sadness? Resisting the urge to wrap her in a hug and kiss her? How about pretending nothing’s wrong? Or accepting the fact that the thing you want most, you can’t have. Or how about living? Does that get any easier? Does it ever?

5/13/2014 4 comments

by Unimportant 5/10/2014

written by Unimportant

Sleeping is awesome.Waking up and realizing how much does this world suck is what I don’t like.If death is like eternal sleep then I have nothing to fear but I still am very scared.Fear of death is probably the only reason why I didn’t kill myself.

5/10/2014 5 comments

by nohopeleft 5/9/2014

written by nohopeleft

I think today should be today. I’ve got nothing left.

5/9/2014 17 comments

Im a Failure and always will be

by Adam1991 5/8/2014

written by Adam1991

Its wierd i was fine this morning then now this afternoon i feel totally depressed very minor thoughts of suicide and how much easier it would be if i didnt have to worry about anything anymore.

the thing that makes me the most depressed it that i have nothing going, im 22 and i have nothing going for me no career started no plans and no matter what i try to do i fail at it, i tried to take me EMR which is my Emergency Medical Responder so i could work on the Oil rigs as a medic, but i failed the mid term as […]

5/8/2014 5 comments

Hi

by clevername 5/8/2014

written by clevername

technically not dead, visited the site a few times, saw some people wondering… resisted the urge to reply, until now.

SP events happened to coincide with an opportunity for some KB (note: this is what my age group calls good weed; it’s short for “kind bud,” which indicates that it’s not “just schwag” or “brick weed,” but is instead, properly grown and almost always seedless); after almost 2 years of abstaining, for what had become apparently irrelevant motivations, i reached my breaking point, and really wanted some. The sample i received, turned out to be… well, i can’t say it was “the best ever,” but it […]

5/8/2014 17 comments

morbidly curious

by Remnant The Unbroken 5/7/2014

written by Remnant The Unbroken

I don’t know about any of you but I frequently look up ways that a person could die so I can structure the most reliable method of suicide possible if I ever came that close to the edge…which is rapidly approaching. You know, things like, “How to take a bunch of pills without throwing them up”, “HowÂ to tie a noose”, “Ways to bleed the most” but my results all turn up with nothing (except the noose one). Perhaps I need to ask the opposite of all these things. Or, just trial and error. Trial and error. I wonder if a near death experience is […]

5/7/2014 10 comments

I am going on Vacation soon

by Shaynax 5/6/2014

written by Shaynax

back to my homeplace and I do not the feelings I should. I am not excited or even remotely happy about it. I am frightened. I have the usual, “common”, yet unrealistic anxiety about the actual flight itself. Its the other things I am worried about too. About running out of medication, about having an anxiety attack, about not being able to sleep, about having alcohol, about losing my mind by not having routine, not doing enjoyable activities, having to lie about who I am because my family won’t accept me. I took the vacation in the first place because I needed to escape my […]

5/6/2014 2 comments

No one to blame

by KIRA 5/6/2014

written by KIRA

I tried so, but nothing worked properly.I don’t mind, not anymore.I did everything I could, I did my best but it wasn’t enough.I’m not mad.I’m ok.I know it’s not my fault.I’m so small.I’m just a tiny stupid spot in this infinitely big and stupid universe.I’ll commit suicide.I’m not the first and I won’t be the last one.I’m just a me.I’ll be just one more.I recognize my smallness and my insignificance and I accept them with a stupid smile on my face. 🙂

5/6/2014 7 comments

Invisible

by lostchild445 5/5/2014

written by lostchild445

Ignore me like disease
A ghost you choose not to see
Pretend I’m not there because
Shortly I won’t be
Maybe you thought I was stronger
That I could live through it
That the lies you spoke no longer linger
And instead I found peace
But you’re wrong, dead wrong
I’m just better at hiding it
The pain you put me through
Gave me much needed guidance
Trust no one
Believe in nothing
And the day will soon come
Where you feel nothing
No pain, no hurt, no sorrow
Maybe emptiness is a better way of living
Keep my heart beating is all you asked […]

5/5/2014 2 comments

Mesmorized

by whitneyirene 5/5/2014

written by whitneyirene

I cut while taking a bath tonight for the first time. For some reason it was so much better than cutting dry. The blood swirled around in the water, seeping from my skin. It was beautiful. I was almost hypnotized by it.

Also, nothing is better than going to bed with fresh cuts I’ve decided.

5/5/2014 5 comments

Serious

by wanderlustnebula 5/2/2014

written by wanderlustnebula

I could seriously just end my life, just like that. Nothing’s stopping me, not even the words of my ”friends &family”. All I see is pain. Give me a break you deluded, sellf-servant prick. If you really believe in the words that you preach, get off your screens and onto the streets! Ahhh Bring Me The Horizon always has the right words… Yet people succeed flawlessly into ignoring people who have the right words. They don’t care about nothing but money anymore and it saddens me, even scares me. This world is a waste, humans have destroyed it, well most of it. There are still […]

5/2/2014 1 comment

The First Try

by onthefringes 5/2/2014

written by onthefringes

(I addressed this to a friend. The thing is, I won’t send it to her. I want it to be read, though, so please do.)

Read this in a place and time where you can handle an emotional outburst. You can’t know how sorry I am for burdening you with this, but you deserve an explanation.

If you feel guilty at this for any second, I swear I will haunt you for the rest of your life.

1/13/14. I have no idea what you were doing that day, but you might remember it by receiving a somewhat suicidal message from me. You texted me later, and I eventually […]

5/2/2014 1 comment

by Zephyrus 5/1/2014

written by Zephyrus

‘Ask him why there are hypocrites in the world.’
‘Because it is hard to bear the happiness of others.’
‘When are we happy?’
‘When we desire nothing and realize that possession is only momentary, and so are forever playing.’
‘What is regret?’
‘To realize that one has spent one’s life worrying about the future.’
‘What is sorrow?’
‘To long for the past.’
‘What is the highest pleasure?’
‘To hear a good story.’
— Vikram Chandra

5/1/2014 1 comment

Forgive me

by quaero 4/30/2014

written by quaero

I expected too much, didn’t i? i made my destination too high and then expected myself to reach there too quickly. i despised myself for every shortcoming i encountered. am i not like that youth in thus spoke zarathustra? i often skip steps, and for that no step forgive me. the more my hopes go higher, the more my passions go downward. what do i seek in the heights? i tried to give a word for my seeking, and since i had heard that ‘nirvana’ is the highest achievable thing , i gave it to my seeking. but the truth is that seeking in me […]

4/30/2014 1 comment

Love For Survival

by ITriedIt 4/30/2014

written by ITriedIt

So I sit here in a class

no one notices what I do

no one

I sit alone with no one by me

like I like to sit but how I hate to sit.

That empty feeling of being alone will always linger.

No matter what.

Even if I sit with my friend or my girlfriend.

I will feel alone.

It won’t go.

It’s madness that I can’t escape it.

I want to escape it more than anything but I can’t.

I just can’t hurt my girlfriend who is depressed on her own.

Every time I try to go she can’t take it.

I can’t stand hurting her.

I just don’t understand.

She would be better without me right?

I know it.

She’s […]

4/30/2014 9 comments

Hypocritical nonsense

by quaero 4/30/2014

written by quaero

All kind of thoughts run through my mind. i can be anything. i can change to any side. just convince me and see where i go. i have always tried to find answers to ultimate questions – questions that are right and on whom my existence and my suffering depends. every time i watch a documentary or read a philosophical novel i get into one of these questions and seems to find myriad of solutions to it. but experience has taught me that they somehow never works. so now when i find a solution i also ask myself why the solution would not work and […]

4/30/2014 0 comment

My face is embarrassing.

by MeganDipo 4/28/2014

written by MeganDipo

It’s not that I’m unattractive, I’m just embarrassed by my face; I hate moving my mouth in front of people; I hate when people look at me. I try to be social but I just creep people out, and that just puts me two steps backwards. My brain is slowing down. I can’t remember words or concepts I need to communicate with people. My brain has become so tired I struggle to remember correct sentence structure when speaking. I am thrust into all of these social activities because of my boyfriend and I constantly embarrass him. Sometimes he catches me staring at nothing and asks […]

4/28/2014 3 comments

And so it goes

by alina_01 4/28/2014

written by alina_01

I have been MIA for awhile, had to deal with all the crap in my life. And to be honest I’m numb so numb that I wonder if the pain was honestly so bad that I had to shut it off like this. Other times I question whether I ever truly cared in the first place. I loved this guy once and he broke my heart and soul TWICE. And I feel nothing, absolutely nothing at all not even a little something. I look at him, I’ve kissed him again just to see how it would make me feel. And yet there is nothing I […]

4/28/2014 2 comments

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