Tag:

older

When is it time?

by Estelwen 6/8/2015

written by Estelwen

I’ve thought about killing myself almost daily since I was 12 years old. I am now 25. My plan/methods became more refined as I got older until I reached a detailed, effective plan. I feel as though I am marching inexorably towards my suicide, even if there is still a very small part of me that doesn’t really want to die. Every time that little part gets drowned out by the suicidal thoughts, I seize the opportunity to purchase another piece of equipment or put another affair in order. Everything is almost ready.

How do I know when it’s time to go?

While I’m at it, in support […]

6/8/2015 2 comments

Story of my life

by Silentnoise 5/30/2015

written by Silentnoise

First of all I”ll tell u about my parents: when my mother was pregnant with me in her she wanted a girl since I have 2 older brothers, so when I was a child she used to treat me like a girl my hair was long, she used to let me wear dresses…etc I really love her the most in my familly, my older brother has psychological problems (autism, shezophrenia and some other syndromes) his iq is 70 – 80 therefore a lot of schools didn’t accept him, he should have went to a private school for special people like him, but my father insisted […]

5/30/2015 2 comments

bittersweet

by godbless 5/24/2015

written by godbless

Today my childhood best friend graduated from high school. She is a year older than me and she moved away a few years ago so we lost touch. I’m really happy and proud of her accomplishment. I can’t help but feel like a complete failure though. I’m never going to graduate or accomplish anything. I have no future or dreams anymore.

5/24/2015 2 comments

Why do I look forward to death?

by BadYear 5/24/2015

written by BadYear

Let’s see.

No more daily emotional pain that is excruciating – more than any physical pain I have felt.
No more feeling like I want to scratch off my own skin just to take away the feeling of emotional pain
No more trying to face people and smile
No more worrying about jobs/cars/bills
No more worrying about will I find a partner.
No more worrying about my health and which diseases I have because I get a headache.
No more worrying about losing my looks as I get older.
No more worrying about anything anymore.

Just peace and calm and NOTHING. I have just 10 days […]

5/24/2015 9 comments

Why Do I Feel Needy?

by yaykitty3 5/19/2015

written by yaykitty3

I am so mad at myself that I feel this way! Why should I suffer when most people have it so much worse. I have a family that loves me, a boyfriend that is awesome, and friends that have my back. It’s just that lately my grades have dropped and I worry that I’m not fitting in. I cut like crazy, and I spend most of my time looking at percabeth fanfictions. I think that I might be going insane! My brothers are so much older than me, and they are amazing at everything. I think that it might be too late for me to […]

5/19/2015 1 comment

What’s the Point?

by Tobias 5/17/2015

written by Tobias

Surely, you’ve heard the phrase “old soul.” Dammit, that’s me.

I’m not that old. I’m still young, most people would say. But the things I’ve been through and the perspectives I’ve held must surely tell another story. I say this with sincerity, not grandiosity. In fact, I’m sorry to admit it. I wish I saw things differently.

All my life I’ve dealt with depression. To be fair, I didn’t start noticing it until I was maybe 9 years old, but I did notice it, and it only got worse with time. Depression brings […]

5/17/2015 2 comments

No Will to Live: Part 3

by QuietlyBleeding 5/16/2015

written by QuietlyBleeding

Enjoying the story so far? GOOD. Before i continue with this part, i will give important facts to remember because it makes the story even better. Isaiah grew up going to a christian church. I know, I know, he grew up with pious pricks, but yeah he was raised with good morals and values. And he always went to either a christian or catholic school. And he also went to summercamps after each school year and recieved the same treatment he recieved from school at summercamps and his church. Isaiah grows up not being able to trust his legal guardians, authority figures, or students. Isaiah […]

5/16/2015 3 comments

I can’t take it anymore, I’m tired.

by Phobia 5/15/2015

written by Phobia

Today might be the day I end this miserable life of mine. Either overdose myself on sleeping pills so I will never have to wake up again, or jump in front of a moving car. I’m sick and tired of being lonely and having fake friends who just use me for things and and make fun of me with their “jokes”, and how they always tell me their “kidding around with me” It’s been eight years I’ve been going to the same fucking school and nothing has changed. As we all got older I still ended up having nobody. I’m obviously worthless and live a […]

5/15/2015 4 comments

Pretty little Freakshow

by Skeleton100 5/10/2015

written by Skeleton100

Once there was a little pinhead who became infatuated with another little pinhead. The two pinheads pinned around together and produced five mini, pathetic pinheads. The pinheads lived from lousy paycheck to paycheck, their kids miserable, lady pinhead an anorexic crying mess half the time…
Finally daddy pinhead meets a sexy blonde library pinhead and they start pinning around secretly. Lady pinhead doesn’t like this. Not one bit. She quits her job, quits taking care of the little pinheads…
3/5 little pinheads end up in institutions for various reasons. Eventually lady pinhead takes her turn in the hospital, where they force her to eat little […]

5/10/2015 2 comments

Where Do I Begin

by pastspeak320 5/6/2015

written by pastspeak320

Sometimes I wish that I didn’t exist. Nothing in my life seems to ever be going right anymore. I wish my life was over all the time. I don’t think about suicide as much anymore, and I haven’t tried in 7 months to kill or otherwisebharm myself, but I still wish I were dead.

Everything was fine until a couple years ago, and now I seem to be in a downward spiral I can’t get out of. I’m an 18 year old girl and most of my life has been pretty tough.

A couple years ago, I got my first job. It wasn’t the best job, but […]

5/6/2015 2 comments

This is what I thought.

by Iamhere1999 5/3/2015

written by Iamhere1999

I am a writer, as most are on this page. I came across this page completely by accident but I guess it wasn’t. I am 16 years old and way to young to be thinking about this topic to some. To me I think that at around this age you are trying to figure out where you belong and what people best suit you. I have been bullied which applys for a lot of people. A lot of people have left mentally and physically and there was and is nothing I can do about it. I thought that maybe I can make a difference with […]

5/3/2015 0 comment

by redemptionsong 5/2/2015

written by redemptionsong

i wish everybody on here and everybody in the world felt nothing but happiness at all times I wish there was no such thing as mean people I feel like if you really think about it most people’s sadness has to do with other people’s actions I just need for this world to be a good place I need to not raise my kids when I’m older to live in a place so depressing and fucked up I just need happiness and I need to be better at wording my thoughts because I sound like a little girl on here who isn’t making any sense

5/2/2015 3 comments

Repurposed

by Sammi6xoxo 5/2/2015

written by Sammi6xoxo

Above are a few of my older shots repurposed or recycled to make one piece.. Is that what I am? Am I just something that someone forgot about? It’s like whatever put me here found me and decided that I could be used to take everyone’s shit. Have I been repurposed? I used to be proud of who I was.. Not so much now..

A flower destroyed for its fragrance

A singer being forced to dance

A branch broken to cause pain

Water released to go down the drain

All of […]

5/2/2015 9 comments

From suicidal to homicidal.

by misssK88 5/2/2015

written by misssK88

Lately I’ve been slowly hating myself and wishing harm on myself less and more so moving those feelings and urges towards others. I have PTSD, which causes anxiety at times and just the other day a couple people pointed out my anxiety and how it makes me seem like a timid, pathetic little thing. Let me tell you something. If you grew up with an alcoholic father who abused you physically and mentally while your other family members turned a blind eye (no matter how many times you stuck up for them when they were being abused)… if you were raped when you were only […]

5/2/2015 4 comments

I have a strange phobia

by fearfuljerk 4/30/2015

written by fearfuljerk

I am an 18 year old male. If this content is too graphic please remove the post, I just don’t have anywhere to turn. Ok, lets get started.

I have a phobia, which entails people thinking I am masturbating. This may sound weird, but it has been developed over the past 4 years, and furthered by constant negative reinforcement.

It all started around the time I was 14, I had begun masturbating prior to this, but before this I really didn’t feel the true motivation to do it. Maybe I am a late bloomer? Anyway, I was caught several times around this age by my mother, and […]

4/30/2015 1 comment

Hi

by Bradley1 4/20/2015

written by Bradley1

I might be a little older than others using this page. I’m 36 married and 3 kids…One of them is 3 years old. But these thoughts always come into my mind that my family would be better off without me. The weight of it. I’ve struggled with these thoughts for years. My wife can find someone bettet

4/20/2015 4 comments

moving on…

by munckin 4/14/2015

written by munckin

Wondering starting to date again… I like one girl more then the others she is cute and sweet. She is originally from the country that I moved too 6 years ago. But also lived in the east and southern of Europe.

She is 8 years older then me. I don’t mind. I actually quite like it as I would like children and I think she would want them too. I wonder though if it is a wise step.. in the longer run for my happiness if that path were to happen….

we click really well so I do not really for see problems in that […]

4/14/2015 2 comments

Help

by sofar 4/13/2015

written by sofar

I have been so close to committing suicide the past couple years and I can’t fight anymore.

I suffer from severe depression, anxiety, and PTSD due to a horribly emotional abusive relationship I was trapped in for almost 2 years. I have anger issues. I have separation anxiety. I am plagued with nightmares.

I do not see a chance of happiness in this world.

I live in the shittiest era of the United States I could have possibly been born in. Jobs are hard to come by, and even if you get one, there’s such a lack of interpersonal relationships anymore. It all relies on your ability to […]

4/13/2015 4 comments

Life Without Depression

by louise52 4/9/2015

written by louise52

…Or rather, life when depression is artificially suppressed by a drug called Abilify. It’s pretty good peeps. The weather here in the UK is freaking gorgeous at the moment. Not hot but so mild and balmy, cloudless sky, pollution in the high range here in London apparently but I can’t say I’ve really noticed.

I was getting out and mixing somewhat before, but always driven by desperation, need and fear of the alternative. Now I’m getting out coz I’m kind of excited to meet new peeps and do new things. Went to a local social meet up thing this afternoon, for peeps over 50 with a […]

4/9/2015 0 comment

Little Brother

by NewGuy 4/2/2015

written by NewGuy

Warning – really long and pathetic post

So I still want to kill myself. And every time I think about this, I think about the reasons I shouldn’t, or why I haven’t already. And most of the time I realize I’m just living out of fear of something. Like the possibility of an afterlife. I think I overcame this. And the other major one, which I think I overcame a few months ago, is the idea of my mother mourning me. I’ve never liked it when my mother expressed her love for me (which I think is common for teenagers with low self-esteem – even though I’m […]

4/2/2015 2 comments

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