It’s been for some years now. That feeling of loneliness and sorrow.
Since my only best friend I’ve ever had abandoned me, I didn’t find any real friends anymore. I don’t know why, but it seems that I’m just so very different from anyone else in my class and my surrounding. People think I’m strange. They avoid me. If we need to do group work in class everyone will sit happily together with their friends and I, well, I’m just standing there trying desperately to find someone to team up with me but no one hears me.
No one is on my side and helps […]
Tag:
pain
I heard this song on the radio again this morning. Last night, I was contemplating whether I’d do “it” now, I just fell asleep crying. Now I’m on my way to school with this song stuck in my head, it kinda makes me feel better. So yeah, Have a good day! 🙂
(i don’t know if the video would embed, i’m on mobile :P)
My friend of 35 years and boyfriend for 5 years killed himself yesterday. A shot of heroin in the arm took his final breath.
Others view it as an overdose because he was cheerful that we were spending the holidays together.
The reality: I found a spoon containing heroine, a Qtip from my bathroom, broken pen from my kitchen, an empty bag of syringes all stuffed a grocery bag with a time dated receipt in a local grocery bag pinpointing when he picked up using again. He just finished a year of rehab and I stood strong beside him.
I photographed the drugs and other items and emailed […]
REALLY CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS SURE WISH I COULD HEAR GOD REALLY ,I KEEP READING AND READING THIS
by RAYSRVS
written by RAYSRVS
Is death truely what you believe to be God’s plan for you? I am hearing that God is calling you to find peace in your life but could that not mean for you to find the path to peace while in your life on earth through the pain. I KEEP TRYING TO MAKE SENSE OUT OF THIS THAT IS WHAT SOMEONE WROTE , I HAVE BEEN ASKING GOD TO TAKE AWAY THIS PAIN, BUT HE OR SHE IS NOT LISTENING OR TALKING TO MEEEEE FOR YEARS AND YEARS >>> SIGNED>>> STILLTRYINGTOCLICKWITHGOD, MAYBE I WILL MEET THE DUDE WHEN I EXPIRE […]
I’m a doll. A toy. I am not alive. I have no emotions. I feel nothing. I am nothing.
If I keep telling this to myself, I wonder, will I finally stop hurting? Will I finally stop being so sensitive? If I keep telling this to myself, will I eventually believe it? Will it become true?
When will it end? Can’t I just become nothing? Can I not just be empty?
I don’t want to feel pain, or sorrow, or disappointment. I don’t want to hurt anymore. I don’t want to feel lonely anymore. I don’t want to feel joy and happiness and excitement, when it just ends […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
I’m 15 years old and I want to die. Today (I guess yesterday now) l told my sister that I didn’t want to live anymore. I also spent most of the day sleeping because I didn’t want to be awake.
Is it bad that all of my friends are moving on and they don’t care about me? I guess my friends and me included are “popular” and I don’t want to be friends with other people? I’ve been feeling left out for a while now. But does that make me a bad person that I choose not to reach out to other people because of […]
I have wholeheartedly decided to end it all on Tuesday (when i have money). You are all so kind, it has warmed my heart. However, my pain is too strong and this is the only way
What Do I Say Now? PART I
I don’t really know how to go about saying what I need to say to all of the people that I need to say something to. Honestly, how do you say that your sorry for killing yourself to all of those that you love and care about; when it was a truly selfish and self-centered thing to do, but it really was what you wanted at that moment and that you are still somewhat bitter about the fact that it was fucked with and you failed at because someone decided they knew what was in your best interest better […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Sitting alone
In this empty room
Crying tears from the pit of,my doom
I promised before that I would stop
But the pain of my heart just ignores that stop.
Holding that razor in my hand,
Is the only way I can feel safe
In this land.
Heartless
Worthless
Mantra I say in my head,
no one will love you,
She says.
Blood streams down
down my leg
weight is lifted.from.my head
Just cut,
Deeper and deeper until
Yes I can feel no more pain.
My eyes close and
there is no more room for me to stay
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Dear whom,
Why is it so tiring? Why? I am abjectly sick of living in this world.
My head is consumed with suicidal thoughts. It screams into my ears, screaming for me to throw my body over a bridge, stab myself with a knife, or hang myself. These thoughts are like a sound, a piercing sound, a frequency that I can only hear. It won’t stop unless my depression can disappear. It is booming into my ears. It is so intense! I can’t stand it. So very tired…
I experience so much agony from this tiredness that befallen on me. I am exhausted to the bones. Unfortunately, this […]
I’ve tried to die three separate times and needless to say, I’m still here. It seems like my pain has gotten worse this year. I truly feel like I’ve been cursed. I don’t trust ANYONE cause I’ve been used time and time again. It seems like the people that cause hurt and pain don’t suffer. I just can’t do anything right. No one cares or understands. Not looking for pity I just want to escape.
So there’s this guy that I’ve been talking to for more than a month and he’s depressed he really needs help he’s been through a world of pain I want him to get help so bad but I don’t think he’ll listen to me he told me last night that he wants to kill him self he said he won’t do it now but one day he will explode and do it he really needs help but how do I convince him to get help I love him very much and he loves me to and no matter what I will always be by his […]
There are so many people suffering, So many people on the verge of death. They wake up every morning hoping their fate will change, praying for a miracle. Every night they dream of being free from their condition and living a full happy life.
And then here I am, a person with a healthy life, with my whole life ahead of me. Healthy and young I have so much to live for, but every day I wake up and hope my fate will change, I pray for tragedy. Every night I dream of being free from this condition called life.
Why cant we switch. Why I can I […]
I was born to fail. I have no qualifications. I have no future. Time to kill myself now. Doesn’t it? I’m 19 and I have no idea about my life and I have no skills too. Maybe I was born by a mistake. Achieved nothing during my lifetime. Help me if you can. Thanks for reading. Hard to breath. Holding so much pain inside me. No, still I’m not crying. Holding this pain for 1 year now. 🙁 ON THE FENCE
Well, is it?
I can’t wrap my mind around this. You hear christians talk about heaven. Oh such a glorious place, no more pain, no more worries, no hunger, no anything but good.
So if heaven is all that…………..is it wrong to want to go there? Why would anyone not want to go there? Is it a real place?
you run , you love,
you could you wont,
you stay, you feel,
you should, you wont
You wont be allowed to being attached to someone without pain.
You wont be allowed to get what you want without hurt someone.
there are friends outhere , waitting for you
and most of the time they love you more than you will love them .
This time…
theres is no one waiting for me, no one who could love me more than I do,
I need to talk , to do something, to get out of my head all those “friendly” people who doesn’t love me back!
Damn it im such […]