Tag:

pain

And another one

by thelost 10/22/2015

written by thelost

She knows not her true beauty, it astounds one to know that this magnificent beauty has no idea she is near angelic. Her skin a golden brown from long hours in the sun, her muscles toned from hours of exercise, soft auburn hair, and a face fit for a princess. This woman’s beauty permeates to the very depths of her soul, although few have ever seen it. A kind word from her is enough to intoxicate most men, and they often fall madly in love with her. Some men even revere her as a goddess

Yet she refuses to see beyond the scars she swears ruin […]

10/22/2015 1 comment

Another short story

by thelost 10/22/2015

written by thelost

She stands there, a broken heart. A lone soul stranded in a sea of emotion. Goddamn if she isn’t beautiful in it though. Her hair moves gracefully with the wind coming in off the lake. Normally she would have tied it behind her, but today such formalities seemed unnecessary. Her eyes seem as if they are on the verge of tears, but she is still beautiful. She is almost more beautiful for all the pain she is in. Her skin has tanned from hours in the sun, and her muscles have become toned from the hours she has spent sailing and maintaining her boat. The […]

10/22/2015 1 comment

voices.

by L0STgirl 10/20/2015

written by L0STgirl

I’m not crazy, their there, always there. They linger in the back of my mind and demand to be heard. Oh the pain, the sweet agonizing pain. Have I created monsters inside me in hopes of never being alone?

10/20/2015 5 comments

</3

by PandaMonkey0207 10/19/2015

written by PandaMonkey0207

All I ever wanted was to die. Those sleepless night I cried. As I watched my blood run down my wrist. He was the only one who made me happy. I pushed him away because of the pain. Now I’m watching form afar. Another girl in his arms. He smiles as he looks at her and I’m wishing it was me. My heart shattered. I’m all alone. I cut to stop the pain. I do it because I don’t want to feel. He always had my heart. I tried to love another but all I could do was think of him. My lover. The man […]

10/19/2015 1 comment

I Don’t Know What to Do Anymore

by Mitzia 10/18/2015

written by Mitzia

It’s been a long time since I was last here. About a year and half, to be exact. I thought I was really getting better but in the last few months, everything seems to be spiraling down again. I’ve read that it’s therapeutic to write about it, so hopefully this will help me.

In July, my boyfriend of seven months, Alex, broke up with me. He was everything I had wanted in a person and I woke up everyday with an overwhelming amount of happiness that I thought the years of suicidal thoughts and depression were finally leaving my mind.

If only I knew how wrong I […]

10/18/2015 1 comment

My first cut

by iambeautiful 10/16/2015

written by iambeautiful

My hands are trembling. I really want to, but it is wrong. I should’nt feel like this. It is wrong. Which sane person gets pleasure from pain. Self inflicted pain. But it sets me free. It sets my soul free atleast for a while. And the scars lighten and disappear eventually. It’s not like i am murdering someone or even commiting suicide. It helps me put things in perspective. My mind isn’t clouded anymore. I forget my sorrow and pain. The emotional pain. It disappears. The sting takes over all that I am feeling. I can cope with it. Yes. I know I want to. […]

10/16/2015 2 comments

Why am I still here?

by bigsis211898 10/16/2015

written by bigsis211898

I don’t know what to do anymore. Maybe my friend Rachel is right. Maybe I’ve lost touch with what is real and what is not. All I know is that I am losing the battle. And I feel like I’m hurting my friends. They can’t deal with my shit. I can’t deal with my shit. I want to die. I want to disappear. But I don’t want to commit suicide. I don’t want to do that to my friends and family. I don’t want to put that pain on them. But I don’t want to continue in this pain. I don’t want to keep fighting. […]

10/16/2015 2 comments

i think

by sarai1996 10/16/2015

written by sarai1996

She killed herself… she’s so strong … cause she ended everything all the pain and hurt she feel…

10/16/2015 2 comments

Good on paper

by themap 10/14/2015

written by themap

I am an insult to depression. I am a living effrontery to depressed people.

I make a LOT of money doing a fairly easy job.

I live in a beautiful house that has been in commercials and magazines.

I bought a new car last week because I was bored with my bmw.

I am constantly surrounded by family and friends who tell me how great I am, and can’t tell you how many people I’ve had fall in love with me.

My best friend lets me dogsit his amazing black lab who is the embodiment of love whenever I want because he knows it helps me.

Despite all this, I am […]

10/14/2015 6 comments

I wanna get rid of this pain.

by Anaiah J 10/14/2015

written by Anaiah J

Well, can someone tell me how to get rid of this pain. I wanna take some pill and just go sleep because I’m tired of my life. Please tell me what to do and how I would die without anyone knowing ..

Thank you.

10/14/2015 3 comments

I Cant Do This Anymore….

by BrokenAngel8 10/11/2015

written by BrokenAngel8

A perfect weekend ruined by one conversation. After a wonderful 21 st birthday celebration. Now just sitting here with new bruises and scars all over me. I cant do this anymore. taking the pain out on my self from the stress, pain, every single little thing that goes wrong and attacking myself like some kind of animal. If I want to be able to live another 21 years this has to stop. I know I have a lot of bad things happened in my life and some good things. I am seriously considering on getting help like get counseling. I don’t believe in this method […]

10/11/2015 3 comments

Be honest

by No_one_care 10/9/2015

written by No_one_care

Am i worth it???
Am i worth this pathetic life?
People see me laughing and smiling but inside i’m dying. How can my life be so complicated??How do i go on?? Do i even try?? I just honestly am struggling with the pain i feel inside.

10/9/2015 14 comments

how do I help?

by onlyoption 10/8/2015

written by onlyoption

so ive been on autopilot to deal with depression for the last 4 years, but now with counselling and therapy I’m starting to come back to life. I’m noticing my feelings and the feelings of people around me. I look at my friend and she is just like I was, apart from shes not on auto pilot, shes feeling every ounce of pain and hopelessness. everything in my body wants to go over there and hold her, and tell her something, make the pain go away, cry with her, so she doesn’t feel so alone. but what do you say? what do you do? we […]

10/8/2015 3 comments

is it wrong

by No_one_care 10/5/2015

written by No_one_care

Is it wrong that every night my tears stain my pillowcase. No one notices i often slip back into the mindset where i just see no point. Everyday i pray to God to give me the courag e to end it. Why am i not good enough??? Why???? I just want it to be over not tommorow, not the next day, but today. I hate myself. I hate my life. No one cares about me. No one loves me. I am giving up. What do i do????? They can’t tell that my will to live has disappeared. They can’t tell that my leg shakes because […]

10/5/2015 5 comments

Sudden depression

by disgusting 10/5/2015

written by disgusting

Sitting at work and having it hit me, how can I be so disgusting, so gross, so untouchable? Just thinking of things I can’t really get in to here, but of course it concerns the guy I love. Why’d he ask me long ago if I could be friends with benefits if the thought of the slightest touch of me is so gross and disgusting? And why in the hell do I have to be the ugliest person in the world? Why couldn’t it be someone else?!! What the fuck did I do to deserve being so fucking gross and ugly?!?

But also, I think I […]

10/5/2015 8 comments

How not to share.

by Thatothersmightlive 10/3/2015

written by Thatothersmightlive

So I haven’t written in this blog for a while. Why? During my time away from this my depth of depression sunk deeper as I found that the world around me continue to push me aside, saying I was no longer physically able to work in my chosen fields. And since I was not working, that ment my knowledge of those fields was no longer of value.So it was best, they said in unspoken words, that I sit at home and wait to die.
So that’s what happened, but as I sat at home in physical pain from my chronic illness and the emotional pain […]

10/3/2015 2 comments

This Test of Life

by RT :) 10/3/2015

written by RT :)

This Loathsome test of life, that nothing is in my hand
except the power to take away my own life
My heart does not desire what i want to do
and i stop myself from doing things that i want to do
My mind is not mine to think, what i want to think
God, why are you testing me with pain
O Sadist, Do you want to give me pain
even bigger than the pain of this life
Or are you waiting that i get so disappointed with life
that i take my life by my own hands
So that you can get a […]

10/3/2015 3 comments

Pathetic Beyond Compare

by Little Black Riding Hood 10/3/2015

written by Little Black Riding Hood

I was just called stupid by my own husband that decided I’m holding him back and that me cutting myself was and is a stupid way to let go of my pain. But what does he know he doesn’t know how much depression hurts and how bad of a toll it takes on people. Anyways he’s deciding that being with me is to much of a problem so as of now I have nothing to look forward to waking up to every day anymore. At least this feeling of hating myself and feeling like a pathetic loser is going to be over soon.

10/3/2015 2 comments

Withdrawl

by FreeToFall 10/2/2015

written by FreeToFall

I live with the hell of chronic pain conditions that affect me every day. I was dimissed from a doctor a month ago and have an appt with a new one soon. I’m on heavy pain meds and they ran out a few days ago. I have Percocet from my pcp to get me through the next few days but it’s not enough. How does someone who’s already severely depressed and daily thinks about suicide handle withdrawl at the same time?? I seriously feel the need to use again, and I haven’t done hard drugs in 10months. I’ve been crying often this past week and […]

10/2/2015 15 comments

Wishing, waiting

by Trix 10/2/2015

written by Trix

I’m trying to remind myself that I’m still that small bit calmer than usual. Things have changed; they’re still better. I’m still trying. I’m not sinking as fast or easily as I used to.

But I’m falling… The depression is agonising. I’m exhausted. My muscles are heavy, uncomfortable and sore. My mind is the same. I’m tired of closing myself off from the world. I’m tired of choosing between letting in the sunlight or being able to think slightly more clearly. It’s so sad to think that I’ve reached a point when a single car journey can set off all my ME/CFS symptoms and leave me […]

10/2/2015 31 comments

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