Tag:

pain

Self-mutilation

by Alexther 7/1/2014

written by Alexther

I love it…

I love feeling the sharp pain as the razor slides across my skin and flesh,creating an opening…

I love the euphoric feelings that comes with every new cut…

I love feeling in control of myself…

I love mutilating myself,through cutting or any other way…

Basically,I only live to harm myself.Smoke as much as I can and hope I get lung cancer.Cut as long and deep as I can until I go to the ER to get fixed.Drink as much as I can,until I collapse into an alcoholic blackout and wake up 24 hours later…

I have learned to enjoy physical pain…As I said,it’s the only thing I keep […]

7/1/2014 1 comment

nothing to loose, either way

by Snake5422000 7/1/2014

written by Snake5422000

Nobody knows what, if anything at all, happens in this hypothetical afterlife. However, knowing what I know about the current world or realm I am in, and where things are going here, and knowing that the better part of my life is already behind me, I am looking at it much like this; if there is an afterlife, maybe I can become a ghost and live forever in a younger and happier state, maybe not. Even if there isn’t anything beyond this, well, zero is greater than negative numbers. In essence, no life at all is better than a life of pain and suffering. At […]

7/1/2014 2 comments

Journal Entry #3

by marine105 7/1/2014

written by marine105

CLICK ON PICTURE FOR A CLEARER VIEW

Comments welcome

7/1/2014 5 comments

Something in the Way

by FromThePitOfMyBurningNauseousStomach 6/30/2014

written by FromThePitOfMyBurningNauseousStomach

An Overall Feeling Of Untapped Anger Ludicrous Expression Of My Burning Nauseous Stomach And Dissociation That Pierces My Soul And The Lust Of The Universe A Sedated Feeling Of Sorrow Contempt And Hatred Low Octave Starvation And Slow Sweet Whispers Of Foreboding.

I’ve lost it. I’ve gone completely insane. I had stuff here, now it’s gone. Maybe it’s for the best. Maybe it never happened. I have a hard time thinking. It’s impossible not to sound like a whiny, punk ***** when I try to explain my situation. I come off as pretentious, hypocritical and mean-spirited. Maybe I am. Sorry for the spam, but I just […]

6/30/2014 5 comments

Living on borrowed time

by andartarius 6/29/2014

written by andartarius

In my head i died two months ago

I had moved to the big city, crowded with too many people, living in a small bedroom , all so that i could accomplish my long life goal of succeeding as an artist. But my illusions broke like a millions of shards of glass when i came confronted to the reality that i didnt had any more of my hard earned money to keep this dream alive, and after giving so much energy, i found myself at 24 years old, alone, broke, and with no one to speak to with no more energy to spare. I had 2 […]

6/29/2014 5 comments

First Post

by greensky 6/29/2014

written by greensky

Hi. I’m a 38-year-old female. I’ve been reading on this site for many months. But I’ve never posted. Today I felt like I should share my story. The first time I thought about suicide was when I was 10. I can remember locking myself in my bedroom closet for two months surrounding myself with pillows crackers and fantasizing about who would be at my funeral and whether anyone would care, I scratched at my wrists. That was the only self harm I can ever recall. That was the beginning of what I consider the bad gene. Fast forward to now present day and what I […]

6/29/2014 6 comments

Moonlight

by Nobody915 6/28/2014

written by Nobody915

Hey guys.

I made a new video and guess what? I hate it. You know why? Because the person I made it for didn’t even appreciate it.

I don’t even know any more.

I’m losing happiness. I thought I got out of the tunnel. I just… don’t know any more. I don’t want to deal with any more pain. But I also don’t want to die. But, it seems as if the only way to not feel pain any more is to die. Why must God or whatever put me in such a position? I have died once, and I don’t plan to die a second time. But […]

6/28/2014 12 comments

Drowning

by mementomori 6/28/2014

written by mementomori

I find myself crying. It seems to be the only thing I’m constant and good at lately. I find myself bursting into tears moment after moment. I try to hold on to those moments of clarity when my energy shifts and my ideals and desires seem so clear. But I can’t, this wave of pain seems to catch me over and over again and no matter how hard I paddle it strikes and submerge me into it’s darks waters.

I feel lost, confused and covered by this dark shadow that rarely allows light to come in. I tried once to commit suicide, in a moment of […]

6/28/2014 0 comment

by msquared 6/27/2014

written by msquared

all i can think on my commute is, if i just step off the platform if i just jump in front of the train, my pain will go away. I’m too much of a coward to do that. i can’t stop tearing up at work, then i was out with my parents and started crying in front of everyone, they just thought i was sad to see my family friends move, sure i am extremely sad about that, but my sadness for myself is much worse. I’m completely miserable to the point i can’t take it anymore. i just want to scream and beg everyone […]

6/27/2014 4 comments

How Much Longer

by PrisonBound 6/26/2014

written by PrisonBound

Simple events cause downward spirals of pain and hopelessness. 45 years old and nothing to show…a complete loser and let down to everyone that knows me. It’s too late. People who say its never too late don’t know the pain, the challenges, the guilt, the shame. Maybe its not too late, but it feels like it.

6/26/2014 14 comments

I hate myself

by blckcat 6/26/2014

written by blckcat

I wanted to cut myself but I didn’t.
I never do.
It’s like I enjoy internalizing my pain for some sick pleasure.
If I’m depressed or sad at least I feel something—
otherwise I feel nothing.

6/26/2014 2 comments

I Am Finished

by marine105 6/25/2014

written by marine105

I wish to terminate the continuance of a certain existence,

though it is obvious that the identity is of someone regarding myself,

I do not wish to expose the exact identity of the person[s] involved.

So I will simply yield this Inquisition:

Why not?

The hour grows short; hasten your responses

6/25/2014 7 comments

Hitting rock bottom once again

by Martinez1023 6/22/2014

written by Martinez1023

Im strung out on coke and weed. And all I can think of is that one day when I survived. I think about it everyday and wonder what I did wrong to have to survive in this world. I literally have everything yet I feel like I have nothing. I just want the pain to go away.

6/22/2014 0 comment

by breakeven 6/21/2014

written by breakeven

Idk what he wants from me. He knows how to change my feelings every second. And it’s just pain to always be strong. Always show him I’m better now. It’s like he knows what makes me melt and what hurts me. And then at night. I get pushed to my limit and no one knows. No one ever will know.

6/21/2014 3 comments

Torture:How is it different from living?

by thepainiskillingme8062 6/21/2014

written by thepainiskillingme8062

Is it wrong for someone under extreme pain to end it the only way they can? I don’t think so. If my life is hell why shouldn’t I be allowed to end it? If it’s mine I’m going to do what I want with it. It’s not your choice, it’s mine, I don’t care if my choices hurt you. That’s on you, not me.

6/21/2014 2 comments

(Y)

by abandon16 6/20/2014

written by abandon16

I lik this its lik a virtual diary n ppl wit the same mind cn help u n give u tips
The stories memories thoughts we write no one cn understand it unless they read this blog i find this a way to write n write n understand my pain more

6/20/2014 0 comment

That haunting memory.

by GroundedAngel 6/19/2014

written by GroundedAngel

I’m new and I just want to say, this is to get my thoughts down on paper but nor bottle them up or keep them as secrets.

I’ll go ahead, without sugar-coating it. I’m an ex rape victim.
Which is funny, I don’t get why it’s known as being an ex victim. It scars you mentally and emotionally and sometimes physically, but I guess it’s happened and it’s not happening anymore. When I was younger, I can remember being put to bed at the house of my grandmother’s on their bed and when I woke up I was crying and my legs […]

6/19/2014 3 comments

planning for the future

by Mad-hatter 6/18/2014

written by Mad-hatter

I am a certified genius.

that’s a good thing and a bad thing.

I am a constant danger to myself. I know exactly how my body ‘ticks’. and I know how to make it stop ticking. I don’t need no knife or revolver I am able to use anything except the air filling my lungs. I have been planning my departure for almost 9 years now. escaping pain in it’s various forms.

heartbreak, impending failure, shame.

6/18/2014 98 comments

the struggle within me.

by im_worthless 6/16/2014

written by im_worthless

its all too real, the pain inside my head. the nauseating,sickly voice telling me to do it. It hard to not tune it out without first listening to what it has to say. I feel like…i feel exhaused honestly. tired and sick of trying so hard when ill forever be two steps behind everybody else. Whats the points of putting so much effort when it goes unnoticed?

Is life suppose to be like this? a cycle of working breathing living, eating, sleeping thats it. Thats not something id be willing to make a life out of. I want to be happy and i want to take […]

6/16/2014 1 comment

depression

by supermajor03 6/15/2014

written by supermajor03

deppresion isnt crying all the time it isnt the constant reminder that you want to die, its the feeling of being numb… its not something you want to have bt you just do. its not like i asked for this life. I would never want someone to feel the pain i feel…

6/15/2014 0 comment

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